Life After I Do Podcast

Our 2 Cents Vol. 27

• Life After I Do • Season 1 • Episode 118

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We close out the year with our most honest “Two Cents” episode yet—full of laughs, tough love, and real relationship conversations. From holiday highlights and personal wins to listener dilemmas involving control, boundaries, postpartum health, blended family dynamics, and stalled commitments, this episode tackles the moments that quietly test love and self-respect.

With practical scripts, compassionate guidance, and humor that lightens heavy truths, we break down why boundaries require enforcement, how silence can become manipulation, and why shrinking yourself is never the cost of partnership. If you’ve ever felt torn between keeping the peace and protecting yourself, this conversation will leave you feeling seen, supported, and clearer about your next move.

Thanks for rocking with us! Don’t forget to follow Life After I Do so you never miss an episode. Got a relationship situation you want us to weigh in on? Hit us at https://linktr.ee/lifeafteridopodcast — we just might talk about it in a future episode.

SPEAKER_00:

I was concerned for her and my child.

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, honestly, what I always tell you, the two things I always said is I didn't, I never paid a tax, I never paid attention to taxes until I became a homeowner. And I never really considered how uh real hormones were until I became a mother. Those were the two biggest things like in life. Like oblivious, I don't care about taxes. They don't exist until I try to buy a house. And then with hormones, I'm like, ah, I'll feel like this forever until I had a kid. So hey everybody, and welcome back to the Life After I Do podcast. Come in, sit down, or drive in your car, or relax around your house. And relax your feet. And party on down with Kai and Mo for the next 45 minutes.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay. Boo. Ooh, Ski.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, Mo. That was too much. Hey, Mo Ski. Hi, babe. How you feeling? How you doing? You look good. Thanks. I'm doing good. My hands are ashy, but.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, I mean, what's new?

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, I'm gonna just try to keep them clean.

SPEAKER_00:

Good hand because you'd be lifting all that weight.

SPEAKER_02:

My hand is ashy because I couldn't find the lotion after I showered.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, I thought you was, I thought you was upstairs. We were talking about 1738.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. That's what they look like when I'm in the gym, though, because I use so much chalk. Hey, what's up? Hello. I'd be like, I said they be like all through the cracks of my hands and everything. People probably be like, really? Hello, hello.

SPEAKER_00:

Unnecessary. But hello again and welcome to the last episode of 2025 of the Laid Podcast.

SPEAKER_02:

Also known as Life After I Do.

SPEAKER_00:

This is coming out on New Year's, New Year Eve.

SPEAKER_02:

Eve. Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00:

And uh has been a year.

SPEAKER_02:

I can't believe we're already at the end of 2025.

SPEAKER_00:

Flown by.

SPEAKER_02:

That's crazy.

SPEAKER_00:

When can I see you again? In 26. I'm gonna see you tonight. I can't.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, this year has flown by though. Yeah, it has.

SPEAKER_00:

The lip is good.

SPEAKER_02:

I feel like it's oh, thank you. Thank you. I thought I would go with something a little bit deeper and richer, a little bit more mature.

SPEAKER_00:

I can't wait to take it off here.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh my gosh. A little making me hot. Um, a little bit more a little bit more mature, you know? Goodbye.

SPEAKER_00:

How's your week, Mooski?

SPEAKER_02:

My week was really good.

SPEAKER_00:

That's good. Let's get to what's important. Okay. What's important? I'm gonna tell you all we turn it down. I don't know. I don't know how to do that. It's been giving. Sorry. I don't know. But go ahead, tell us about your week.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh my week was good.

SPEAKER_00:

How was your Christmas?

SPEAKER_02:

My Christmas was fabulous. My baby girl was excited. It was, you know what I loved about Christmas? Christmas was extremely chill. Right. Extremely chill. Like you. I even got a photo of both of my parentals on my couch, both taking a nap. That's how chill Christmas was. For you. It was chill for you too. You didn't have to do nothing. Well, aside from a handyman. He was an elite employer. He was my elite employer.

SPEAKER_00:

I said, I'm gonna be putting shit together for the next four days.

SPEAKER_02:

It took him six hours to put that bed together. And that was just the first that was just the bed. Yeah. And you didn't go to bed until like what 2 a.m.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes.

SPEAKER_02:

And I was like, I said, listen here, as long as her bed and stuff is like put together when she wakes up and she can walk into her room and like see everything cleared out and see her new bed and like her bedding and stuff like that, she'll be excited. And then you can just put the rest of the stuff together on Christmas and she'll she'll be excited as she was. She she spent pretty much most of the day in her room.

SPEAKER_00:

On Christmas.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, you do, because you were talking about how good my greens were.

SPEAKER_00:

No, I'm talking about like breakfast for Christmas morning.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, because oh, because you were upstairs putting things together, and I had a breakfast down here on the table, and I asked if you wanted to eat, and you were like, Yeah, I will. And then you came down here after we had all eaten.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, y'all didn't even wait for me. Co-work. Listen, co-work. Yeah, it'd be like that.

SPEAKER_02:

But um, Christmas was really good. I'm very grateful and blessed. Thank you, Jesus. Got through Christmas. Um, she was happy, she was excited, she got everything that you know, pretty much that she asked for. She wanted a new room and an e-reader.

SPEAKER_00:

She got everything, but and I feel bad about it.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, her Leo?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, she can get her Leo.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, that's okay. She'll get one next month when we go to competition because we always get her one. It doesn't matter. She'll be fine. She'll be fine.

SPEAKER_00:

I'm gonna get my baby her lead. Now I gotta get her two. Do do you, Boo Boo? Do you? Dos Leos.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, but yes, super grateful. Um, happy to hear, like, you know, everybody had a good Christmas. I had my mom, my dad here. I wish my sister was here, but you know, that's oh, she played my life. Um, I wish we could have had gumbo and had my sister here, but that's a different story.

SPEAKER_00:

So see, why are you getting it?

SPEAKER_02:

It's a different story.

SPEAKER_00:

I wasn't gonna bring it up. But now I gotta bring it up.

SPEAKER_02:

But my butt but but okay, on a scale of one to ten, and do not play my life in front of these people. Okay. Don't be trying to tell me one thing behind closed doors and get out here on God's interwebs and lie. How was my roast? My roast was on a scale of one to ten, Maurice. Don't make me hurt you. It was a don't make me hurt you.

SPEAKER_00:

It was a solid seven and a half. Pretty good. Seven and a half? It was, I mean, it wasn't as good as mine.

SPEAKER_02:

That's okay. That's the only reason why you're giving me a seven and a half. Whatever, it's okay. It's okay. You want to fake it, but then you want to praise me behind closed doors. I'm sure there's a term for people like you.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, all I was saying is that I was very I was very proud of your cooking. I said, she has I said maybe she has been listening. What? Maybe she has been watching me cook. Isn't that difficult to cook a roast? Okay, all right now.

SPEAKER_02:

Seasons, seasons, seasons, fearing and putting it in a pressure cooker.

SPEAKER_00:

Did you see the lady that seasoned that damn ham with water?

SPEAKER_02:

What you can't season anything with water. What are you talking about? She seasoned a ham with water. Wait, no, back up.

SPEAKER_00:

The guy stitched the video and said, Man, what the water tastes like?

SPEAKER_02:

Wait, what do you mean she what did she do? Sit it in water and let it soak, or what?

SPEAKER_00:

The ham. She had like precooked ham. Okay, well that's that's where we already messed up. She put them on like a bacon tray, and then she poured, she said, first off, I'm gonna start off, I'm gonna start off by seasoning them with water. I said, bitch, what you doing what next? Was it Josh's mama? No. But it was the same complexion.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, okay, so I gotta I gotta know. Okay, so she put it on a bacon sheet, she put water on it.

SPEAKER_00:

When I watched her pour the water on there, I cut it off. Because at that point, I said, I'm not I don't have to sit here for this.

SPEAKER_02:

That's why I have to take a dude. I have the right to scroll. And when she started with, I'm gonna season it with water.

SPEAKER_00:

I said, bitch, getting pusher.

SPEAKER_02:

What you're not gonna do is ruin my day. That's what you're not about. My week was good. Oh, I didn't ask you, but go ahead. It don't matter. I was like, I didn't ask you. Oh, wait, before we before we end my week, I just want to say that I am ending 2025. I'm ending 2025.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, good note. Tell them why being go ahead. I already know where this is going.

SPEAKER_02:

Being able to decline bench, not flat yet, but decline bench 185 pounds for two on my first three. I could have done four. That's neither here or there. That's neither here nor there. But I had I had my see now. The thing is, I mean, let me just preface this. I have my gym girlies there with me. And you know, when the girls are together and when you're in like a group with like women who lift and they want to do it like for real, like even if we're just trying some shit that we know we can't lift, that's like the joys of it. But that's where I really appreciate gym community because like the people that we've met at the gym, like our gym friends, you know, the gym girls were there, my gym girls were there, and my girl Jen, shout out to Jen. Jen hit 185 on decline for four, and that was her very first time. And so um I told her, I was like, Well, you know, if you hit 185 on decline, I was like, I'm gonna at least try. I said, if even if you do one, I'm gonna at least try. And so she got under there and she was like, okay, and she cranked out four. I know. And I was like, I spotted it. I said, okay. I said, well, I'm she was like, get under there, and she was on the sideline cheering me on, and she was like, up, up, up, and I did two.

SPEAKER_00:

Could have done three.

SPEAKER_02:

I could have dree, but I stopped at two and I was proud of myself.

SPEAKER_00:

Since you're mentioning names, I think it's time that I say it publicly.

SPEAKER_02:

Say what?

SPEAKER_00:

That Jen is my favorite.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, bye.

SPEAKER_00:

And I will flip this up so that Marlena can see that.

SPEAKER_02:

I think I think she's your favorite too.

SPEAKER_00:

No, Jen's my favorite.

SPEAKER_02:

Just Jin?

SPEAKER_00:

Just Jim. Okay. No, Chris is my favorite too.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I love her. I love all of them. I love all my girls. I don't I don't love them. I they're cool. Okay. Well, you know what I mean. Like, they're cool. The the the the girlies, my gym girls, that my lifting gym girls, like, okay. I get that that's that helps me to be motivated and excited to go to the gym. When I see them there, I'm like, oh, the girls are here. That means the girls are putting in work. Glad that I showed up and I wasn't the weakest link this week. So that's that's really that's really fun. So that was the highlight of my week. Okay. Aside from that, was my personal highlight for myself. And but my highlight overall was seeing my child enjoy a good Christmas. Well, tell me about your week. Like you were about to tell me.

SPEAKER_00:

Them Eagles won. Lord, it was stressful.

SPEAKER_02:

You're sitting up there having my baby screaming like she knew what she was screaming for.

SPEAKER_00:

She knows what's going on. I'm teaching her the game.

SPEAKER_02:

And at this point, like teaching her to behave irrational over a football game.

SPEAKER_00:

Like I said on Facebook, I say at this point, I'm applying for the offensive coordinator position. Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

Because bye, Demel. Goodbye.

SPEAKER_00:

Because KP ain't it.

SPEAKER_02:

I know KP is. He's the office coordinator.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, he's doing a terrible job. What they do? He's doing terrible job. He calls the place.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_00:

He's doing he's doing a terrible job at it.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. Well, I mean, they won. So is he doing a terrible job?

SPEAKER_00:

This is the first screenplay I seen called all year long. I said, I ain't never seen us run this play. I said, I guess that's an improvement, but he's still doing terrible. Okay. But my week was cool. I was really happy that my baby was happy. My daughter, not you, about Christmas. Uh her her morning, Lord, Lord, she couldn't stop um talking about the e-reader. And then she gave me a list of about 10 books.

SPEAKER_02:

That she was like, I need these right now.

SPEAKER_00:

So we need to purchase these right now.

SPEAKER_02:

You had to download Kindle Unlimited.

SPEAKER_00:

I said, Phoenix. I said, calm down.

SPEAKER_02:

She said, I heard it. It says unlimited.

SPEAKER_00:

I need these ones right here. I said, okay, baby, I'm gonna get these books for you. But it was cool. It's just the first, I didn't look here. The one I'm gonna I'm gonna give my wife credit, y'all, because I told her, I said, look, I'm not cooking nothing. Yeah, I was okay with that. I'm not making no sides, I ain't making no desserts. I was okay with that. I ain't making nothing. Now normally I do most of the cooking.

SPEAKER_02:

And even on for like a for a holiday like that, not most of the cooking.

SPEAKER_00:

And even your mama, your mama was like, Why you got here in there? Why you not in here? I said, Because I told her I'm not doing this. Because what I wanted was gumbo. Now I'm back to the gumbo. Oh my god. I wanted gumbo, people, and I would have been down to help cook the gumbo.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, he would have he would have cooked the gumbo.

SPEAKER_00:

I wasn't gonna do shit for gumbo. I would have cooked the gumbo. But since her mother.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, now she's not your mother-in-law because you're upset you couldn't have gumbo.

SPEAKER_00:

Since her mother is allergic to shellfish, I can enjoy my holiday.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, because I didn't want to run the risk of my mother having.

SPEAKER_00:

You could have stayed outside.

SPEAKER_02:

Goodbye. Okay, now you sound as absurd as my father. He talking about, he was like, Why you couldn't get a damn epi pen? And my mom was like, I guess I could have tried to get one, you know. Maybe next year.

SPEAKER_00:

Your daddy was right on point when he said, How about he's like, that's kind of selfish, ain't it? He said, How the hell is it nine versus one and the one win? I said, exactly.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh, because we don't want the one to end up in the embedded. Then she's gonna stay at home. Goodbye. Why she got a road on our holidays? She didn't. Goodbye. Don't worry, Mom. I got your back.

SPEAKER_00:

I could have been up I could have been in here uh cracking uh crab legs and cut it out.

SPEAKER_02:

Eating good old sauce. Well, think of it, think of it this way. You say you saved money.

SPEAKER_00:

No, I didn't because the kenya would have all that shit.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye. No, she wouldn't have.

SPEAKER_00:

Cut that out.

SPEAKER_02:

Cut it out. But it was a cool week. Yeah, it was a really cool week. I can't complain.

SPEAKER_00:

We're going into um the I mean 2025 is uh blinked. That's how fast it was over.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. Usually, you know what? Usually I feel like I can't remember much from um the beginning part of the year, but I think it's because I like I think this year I can I can think back to January, I can think back to March, and I think it's just because I had certain uh it's because I had certain goals that I wanted to achieve. So I did. That's good. I did. So um I did not achieve my goal. Fee and I were talking about our goals for 2026, and I told her that we're gonna work on our vision boards and um, like, you know, map out what we wanted to do, like as a family, and map out what we wanted to achieve in the world. This is true. She's to New Germany.

SPEAKER_00:

She told me, look here, Dad, I just need to be on a plane in 2026.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. Oh, and she wants another Disney channel.

SPEAKER_00:

She said, I don't care. Because she's 48 inches tall. She said, I don't care where the plane is going, I just want to be on the plane.

SPEAKER_02:

I just need to, I just need to Well, you know what? I'm I'm happy because she's at that age now where we can start taking those types of um, you know, vacations where they're going to be memorable for her, where she can really remember them. You know what I mean? Like taking her places where she's like two and three, she may not remember. I remember. We remember because she ruined it for us. Bye. We remember. So let me ask you. But now she's at the stage where she can like verbalize and she can have the experience and she can have an input. And so that's what's gonna be.

SPEAKER_00:

Let me ask you this before we get into the episode. Give me, give me two highlights and two lowlights of the year.

SPEAKER_02:

Of this year?

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, I mean, you can do it in 2026.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, one of my lowlights was that I did not um sign up for my first competition. Okay. Um, another lowlight is that I did not uh hit one of my 400 lifts.

SPEAKER_00:

I mean, you can you can. You just bullshitting.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, and then my highlight, uh my highlight is that I stayed consistent with my plan. Like the plan, you know, my plan that my coach wrote out for me. Um as far as no, as far as like the workout plan, consistent. Yeah. The eating sometimes is what, you know, you know, but we we've gotten a lot better at it, gotten a lot better at it. Um so the highlight is that I was consistent with my workout plan. Um, and then my other highlight is that let's see, because these are like personal highlights. I'm not gonna do like my family highlights, just my personal highlight. Um, my other highlight is that I broke um 320 for my squat. That's good. All right, well, we got it. What's your what's your two lowlights? Huh? What's your two lowlights? Low lights and your two highlights.

SPEAKER_00:

Um my low light is about to gain weight back because my wife keeps feeding me stuff.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. Wow. I'm to blame. That's crazy. It is. That's wild.

SPEAKER_00:

Um, other low light, uh, you know, I've you know, I've I've had some really dark place, dark times this month, this year. Those are lowlights. Um, my highlights is uh, you know, I'm if I take it gym related, I've worked out all year long. I guess that's a plus. That's great. Um, I can finally um lift my body weight all major lifts.

SPEAKER_02:

And you can do 225 for eight. A nine, actually. Don't worry about that. Um don't worry about that.

SPEAKER_00:

And um, so yeah, that's it. Yeah. Oh, and my other highlight, the girl that car paid off.

SPEAKER_02:

Hallelujah. Hallelujah, hallelujah. Let's take a moment. Right. Let's take a moment for receiving my pink slip. Thank him. Thank you, Jesus. What do you do all the time?

SPEAKER_00:

Came through.

SPEAKER_02:

Ask and you shall came through.

SPEAKER_00:

Receive the USPS.

SPEAKER_02:

Came through the USPS. Wait, and then not us driving the other day, and then we were coming home, and we both felt like something in the car, and you're like, Yeah, you bet, you bet you listen here, you dirty hell. We literally, literally just take the car off, and then we're on our way home, and the car like it like felt like it was like pulling or something, and he looks at me, and I look at him. He was like, Did you feel that? And I was like, I did. I was like, listen, you feel don't you put me in my mental my current mental state. Now, listen, I'm you know you know me. Like, I'm not gonna be opposed.

SPEAKER_00:

You ain't never opposed to get nothing new.

SPEAKER_02:

Not gonna be opposed to having to get a new vehicle. However, I would like to enjoy like not having the car payment.

SPEAKER_00:

This is the first time in six years that we have no car payment.

SPEAKER_02:

On all in any of the cars, yeah. Like all three cars, we have the pink slips.

SPEAKER_00:

And I am trying to be last in this because if I can get her to stop gymnastics, I can go get a truck.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, bye. Goodbye. Good damn.

SPEAKER_00:

What we got today, Booski?

SPEAKER_02:

Um, it's the end of the month, it's the end of this the year, and we're going back to back. It's an hour two cents episode because we we came in here laughing and giving our two cents, and we're gonna leave laughing and giving our two cents. And quite frankly, I love the interactions that you guys have with this segment of the show. The comments are always giving with this segment of the show. So, like, I love it. And I love how you guys participate and send in, send in these stories because y'all be hope you get some good ones. Y'all be y'all be stressing me out sometimes. It's it's good, but y'all be stressing me out sometimes. Um, okay, so let's let's start here. Start a little lighter. Um, I've been doing a lot of reading, so you have to excuse me because my eyes are a little tired.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, Shane put a book down.

SPEAKER_02:

I have not. Y'all I've literally that smut. Okay. D. I'm not reading, I'm reading thrillers.

SPEAKER_00:

She's been deep in the middle.

SPEAKER_02:

I am reading thrillers. I need you to cut it out, okay? Um, but I am like, as soon as I finish a book, I'm like, what's the next one? So my eyes are a little tired, but here we go. But you're my phone. Um I don't like you. So they want to know if they're gonna be an asshole, okay? Um, so she wants to know she's an asshole for wearing red makeup when her fiance explicitly asked her not to. Okay. Okay. Well, our situationship is an arranged setting. He's 26. I'm 21. Um, we've been talking for about two months now. The only reason we aren't married yet, I'm hoping she means two years. The only reason we aren't married yet is because he can't get a few days off of work until February. Okay. That sounds quite he's kind of on the romantic. Side, I say. He's acting just fine until a few days ago. I was at my friend's wedding, and when I got home, I got a text from him saying, Whatever outfit you wear, don't wear red makeup because you look good without it. I previously told him that red is my favorite color, and seeing him say that kind of made him feel me feel like he was being controlling. To that, I said, It's my favorite color, so I'll be wearing it. We can talk about it. You can further explain yourself and point out the reasons why. Um, why, if you're uh comfortable enough, but do not expect me to not wear it because it's my favorite color. I sent him some pictures from the wedding I attended, asked about how his day went and all. He wasn't online, plus my phone was dead, so I said bye and I went to bed. He stopped talking to me after that. He didn't respond to my texts or any of my calls. He left me on scene. I didn't realize he was mad because I thought he was just busy. I sent him a text anyway, thinking he'll see it when he had time. Later he replies and seemed kind of cold. He was responding in short answers, responding late, even though he saw my text right away and wasn't asking me anything about my friend's wedding. Then that's when I realized he was mad. I told him that we could talk if he wanted to. And again, he left me on scene. He was sulking, which made uh which he was sulking that made me mad, so I had stopped texting him. The next day he uploaded a status saying being burdened with too much emotions. He uploaded that at four in the morning, which means he didn't go to sleep. Later that day at evening, he sent me a song link. The song was about not wanting to fight. Knowing him, I know he doesn't like to listen to these kinds of songs, and more likely, he searched it up. I find that crazy, lazy, and childish. If he had had enough time to find a song, then he could have just said or sent me a text or a voicemail saying what he wanted to say. He gave me the silent treatment for three days, then decides to send me another song link, not even apologizing and expecting me to act like nothing had happened. I still hadn't texted him. Why would a man have any problem with a certain colored makeup? It's freaking illogical. It isn't about the makeup at this point. If he's gonna act ignorant every time we have a disagreement, then how is he gonna act in a real serious, difficult situation? I told my mom about it, and she wants me to apologize and to just obey him. I said I'm calling off the wedding if that's how things are gonna be. He is supposed to be a partner, not someone I take orders from. So am I the asshole?

SPEAKER_00:

Yes and no.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_00:

Either way.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. Let me hear, let me hear the reason why she's the asshole.

SPEAKER_00:

Because he asked you directly not to wear that color. So he asked you directly and you refuse. And so he sees that as a sign of disrespect. Got it. And that's why he just he didn't know how to uh convey his feelings or how he felt in the moment, how that man felt. That's why he probably ghosted you, which I don't condone. He should be a man and express yourself because you need to be heard. So that that part of it is why, because he asked you not to. Granted, whether it's your favorite color or not.

SPEAKER_02:

I was you know that's where I was going, but go ahead.

SPEAKER_00:

He asked you not to. I me personally, I would have I I it would have been, I think it would have been better if she would have just for that day didn't wear it and then right and then try to get to the bottom of what he meant. So for that part, kinda, right? She's not an asshole because he ghosted her.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_00:

And then now he's sending subliminal messages through song links.

SPEAKER_02:

Which is crazy.

SPEAKER_00:

Because you can't use your words. Because you can't use your words. So nah. Okay. But this is weird. Y'all young, and if you don't want to tolerate this, leave us ask anyway. I mean, come on. He can't be that robust of a romantic if he's going ape shit over the color red.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, so I'm gonna say, just for overall, first of all, I can totally understand where you're coming from. But about how you know, I can totally understand where you're coming from about him like specifically asking her if you could not wear that. Um, but if you remember, he said, could you not wear that simply because you don't, like you don't need to, like it's not necessary, you know? I'm quite sure that he knew that red was her favorite color way before things got serious enough. Okay. Before marriage. Make sense? You know? It's kind of it's kind of like saying my favorite food is mango. But because you just don't like mangoes, you think that I should just not buy mangoes or keep them in the house. You it like it's it just sounds weird, right? So it's like if you know my favorite color is red, if we met and I had red fingernails, or at some point during our relationship, I'm sure you've seen her in red lipstick or like a red dress or red nail. Hold on, I'll let you talk. I know. Um, and then now all of a sudden we're getting close to like the whole thing of marriage and me being your wife. And now you are throwing a temper tantrum because I decided to wear a color that your only explanation for you not wanting me to wear is simply because you just felt like I didn't need it. That's a that's that's that sounds off the alarms for me. Like there's something else behind it that he's not saying, but he he needs to be a big boy, exactly. And he's abuse his words because that's another part that would turn me off, and that I'm not going down the aisle when you can't even express to me how you feel, and you're sending me song links. We're not in high school.

SPEAKER_00:

I agree with you. Another thing is her mom is wild for saying she's obeyed.

SPEAKER_02:

I was getting there. I was I was getting I just thought about that part. I was getting away. Mama is wild for just saying for her to say just shut up and obey.

SPEAKER_00:

Shut up and read a book.

SPEAKER_02:

Listen here.

SPEAKER_00:

That's wild.

SPEAKER_02:

Listen here. We are not like I'd be like, Mama, I love you and all, but this is not like your mom's mom's mom's era. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00:

Because women nowadays beat men.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye. I don't, I don't have to sit here and just like your mom literally told you to sit down, shut up, and obey.

SPEAKER_00:

Crazy work. Crazy work. Crazy work. I would I would I'm telling my daughter hit him with a left.

SPEAKER_02:

Shut up. Hit him with a left. Maybe, maybe she thinks like her daughter wouldn't have any more prospects, and she's like, girl, don't ruin this bitch. Now you're just thinking, I was like, maybe she her mom is probably thinking, like, girl, you do not have the playing cards to be playing games like this.

SPEAKER_00:

You you barely got him.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, you you might want to just pipe down a little bit and just listen to the man.

SPEAKER_00:

Me part, I think those situations are weird for me.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

I don't know. I I hope this is made up.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

You hope all of them are.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, okay. So let's see. Am I the jerk for telling my husband I want a divorce in front of his sister after she invaded our privacy again?

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, let's go.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, I'm a 35-year-old female and I've been married to my husband, Mark, who's 37 for six years. We've had ongoing issues with his families, lack of boundaries, particularly his younger sister, Amy, who's 29. Mark's family is very close-knit, which I respect, but their immersement often infringes on our life as a couple. Two years ago, Amy went through a really bad breakup and needed a place to stay. That's the problem. Mark offered our guest room without consulting me. That's a problem, too. I wanted to be supportive, so I agreed to a two-month time frame, but Amy ended up staying for eight months. During that time, she consistently overstepped. I would come home to find her wearing my clothes, using my expensive skincare products, and even sleeping in our bed when we were out.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, that's too much.

SPEAKER_02:

She would eat the special treats I bought for myself and monopolize our shared spaces. Mark always made excuses for her behavior, even after she moved out. Amy would show up unannounced at all hours, letting herself in with the key Mark gave her. I repeatedly asked Mark to set boundaries, but he accused me of trying to come between him and his family. Could have sworn you were his family, but whatever. The final straw came last week. I came home from a stressful day at work looking forward to a relaxing bath in our master bathroom. I walked into our bedroom to find Amy napping in our bed again. I can't. She'd gone through my closet and was wearing my silk robe. I lost it. I woke her up and told her that she needed to leave immediately. Mark came in and started defending her, saying she just needed a place to crash. In that moment, something in me broke. I turned to Mark and I said, I can't do this anymore. I want a divorce. Amy looked shocked. Mark started arguing with me, but I held firm. I told him I was done having my privacy invaded and my needs dismissed. I said that I would be filing for divorce first thing Monday morning, and I wanted Amy to hand over the key and to leave for good. I feel awful for springing that on Mark in the heat of the moment, but I hit a breaking point. He's blown off my concerns for years and seeing Amy in our bed again in my clothes, I just couldn't take it anymore. Am I the jerk for announcing that I want to divorce in front of my sister-in-law after she violated my boundaries one too many times?

SPEAKER_00:

I'm gonna say no. I'm gonna say no. Because you had already drawn the line in the sand, so now you had to double down. Yeah. So you sometimes you gotta say no business.

SPEAKER_02:

I feel I feel like yes and no.

SPEAKER_00:

I'm not done. And I understand where she's coming from.

SPEAKER_02:

No, you don't. Shut up. There ain't nobody sleeping in your bed. Ain't nobody being in your clothes.

SPEAKER_00:

Hold on. They're not in my clothes.

SPEAKER_02:

But they're sleeping in your bed.

SPEAKER_00:

Not napping, but I have come home.

SPEAKER_02:

Not napping.

SPEAKER_00:

I have come home and have uh standing in your room? Some in-laws in my bed.

SPEAKER_02:

Who was in your bed?

SPEAKER_00:

A cousin and a sister-in-law.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00:

In my bed. Knowing how I felt about that. And I let that go. Oh I I tried to be the bigger man.

SPEAKER_02:

They were talking to you.

SPEAKER_00:

No, they wasn't. They were in the bed.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, okay. I don't. All right.

SPEAKER_00:

After I had left, I had came home from work and they was in the bed.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh.

SPEAKER_00:

Same situation.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_00:

And the two months, I know about that. Two months turn to eight. Oh, Lord knows I know about that. Who tell you you try to help family boy? They they overstep. But you're she's not a jerk at all. I get it. I'm on her side.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, so I would say.

SPEAKER_00:

I probably look here. I probably wouldn't have done it exactly in front of her, but doing it in front of her.

SPEAKER_02:

She wasn't in the home for doing that. That's the whole question she's asking.

SPEAKER_00:

But doing it in front of her now, now wasn't it?

SPEAKER_02:

You think the sister-in-law is gonna feel guilty? Because she's not.

SPEAKER_00:

She is.

SPEAKER_02:

She isn't. She is. She isn't.

SPEAKER_00:

She is.

SPEAKER_02:

She wasn't even considerate of the wife before. You really think she gives two damn exams? No, no. The only thing is that the city isn't.

SPEAKER_00:

No, because now her and Mark gotta go back home with their parents.

SPEAKER_02:

No, her, she gonna, she's gonna comfort Mark by telling Mark his wife was a bitch anyway.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, yeah. I mean, of course, because she gotta protect her for where you lay her head.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. And so then now her and Mark can probably go find a place together and live happily ever after.

SPEAKER_00:

I hope they're not in Alabama. They might be too close. Bye, Maurice. You know what they say about people in Alabama.

SPEAKER_02:

No, I don't. Well, what do they say about people in Alabama? Go ahead and read the next one. What do they say about people in Alabama? I want to know.

SPEAKER_00:

You know.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, I don't. But anywho, um, am I the jerk for considering giving my wife an ultimatum about her weight? Or I leave. Let's go. It's not what you think it is. Let's go. I already know how the title sounds, but please hear me out before you come for me. I love my wife, and I genuinely think she's beautiful, and I fell in love with her even more after she gave birth to our son three years ago. This isn't about attraction. This is about something way more serious. After she had our son, she put on baby weight, which is completely normal and fine and expected, but she never lost it and instead kept gaining more. She was already really depressed, so I thought it was PPD and encouraged her to see someone about it. She started therapy and after trying a few different antidepressants, she found one that worked. Mentally, she's been doing so much better since then. Physically, though, things have only gotten worse. She's 5'2 and currently around 260 pounds. Her BMI is close to 50 and she just keeps gaining. I need to be clear, this isn't about how she looks. I still find her attractive and I still love her very much. But heart disease runs in her family, and at this rate, she's going to die. I don't want to watch the woman that I love and the mother of my child slowly kill herself while I do nothing. I've tried everything I can think of. I've asked her to go to the gym with me, suggested we do a diet together, offered to meal prep so she doesn't have to think about it, asked her to stop ordering fast food, tried to get her into active hobbies, things we could do as a family. She says no to it all. Every single time, and I don't know what else to do. I've been supportive and patient for three years and nothing has changed. If anything is gotten worse, I'm at the point where I feel like the only option left is an ultimatum. Either she makes a genuine effort to get healthier or I must leave. I can't sit here and watch her eat herself into an early grave and leave our son without a mother. I hate that it's come to this, and I never wanted to be the guy who threatens to leave overweight, but this feels like life or death at this point. Am I even a jerk for even considering this?

SPEAKER_00:

I'm gonna say no. I'm gonna say no. Now here's why here's why. Here's why I'm gonna say no. As someone who has been in a deep depression state and was only pushed out of that state by an ultimatum, the ultimate that you gave me that woke me up to reality, that helped me.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_00:

So that part I'm gonna say no to. Where it gets tricky for me is that she's dealing with postpartum.

SPEAKER_02:

Right, but it's getting taken care of. Like she's on antidepressants and stuff.

SPEAKER_00:

We don't know how much that's actually.

SPEAKER_02:

Right, and the medication could also be contributing to the weight gain. Exactly.

SPEAKER_00:

So it's like I uh on that side, I don't think it's as cut and dry as she thinks it is. Because yes, she may be at a better place at a better space mentally because of the medication. But she's not over the hump. But the medication may be forcing eating may be a side effect of other medications. Medication, yeah. Uh uh increased hunger or whatever. Yeah. And if she wasn't really active before.

SPEAKER_02:

And she the her maintenance, like her body maintenance was just like an acceptable weight to you. Yeah. Right. And then the, but there was like she didn't meal prep before, she didn't go to the gym before, and then but she just had a like what you think is considered a healthy body weight, you know, then So I mean, I don't I don't think he's wrong because he's a he said he's considerate, he's considering it.

SPEAKER_00:

I don't think he should give her the ultimatum.

SPEAKER_02:

You don't think he should give her that type of ultimatum?

SPEAKER_00:

I don't. Okay. Because uh I do believe in wedding vows, and you said in sickness and health. So And this is part of her being sick then. So if if you believe that this road is leading her down heart disease, all you can do is try to help her along to avoid that. But you you signed up to be by her side through sickness and health. Yeah, it's a tough situation to be in. And at first I thought this was gonna be something where I could rag on them, but it's not.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, that's why I told you. I was like, you're like, oh, let's go. I was like, it's not what you think.

SPEAKER_00:

Um but yeah, it's it's hard because I I I mean, I don't want to put all your business out there, but when you when when my wife was postpartum, Lord Jesus, like I I was concerned for her and my child.

SPEAKER_02:

Like I mean, honestly, what I always tell you, the two things I always said is I didn't, I never paid a tax, I never paid attention to taxes until I became a homeowner. And I never really considered how uh real hormones were until I became a mother. Those were the two biggest things like in life. Like oblivious, I don't care about taxes, they don't exist until I try to buy a house. And then with hormones, I'm like, ah, I'll feel like this forever until I had a kid.

SPEAKER_00:

So yeah. Um because the look on my wife's face when I used to come home from work and my daughter was fresh out. I'd be like, here's your baby. After she had just um, you know, did her nine-month bed.

SPEAKER_03:

Really?

SPEAKER_00:

Like, I could just I could just tell, like her, she was exhausted. It's exhausting. She was exhausted mentally, mentally, physically, emotionally. I would come in the I would come home from working, you know, 11, 12 hours, and she would say, I'm gonna give you an hour to shower.

SPEAKER_02:

Get something to eat, and then you come get the child you asked for, sir. Come get your baby, come get your baby, and I'm gonna go to the room and I'm closing the door.

SPEAKER_00:

The cold part about it is she does it today. I'm leaving here really with your baby.

SPEAKER_02:

No, I don't. You're such a jerk. I do not.

SPEAKER_00:

She's gonna leave me and my baby at this house.

SPEAKER_02:

If me and my broke bestie be out in the streets together.

SPEAKER_00:

Now y'all do.

SPEAKER_02:

We was out in the streets last night.

SPEAKER_00:

But yeah, sir, I I wouldn't do it. This is uh this is serious. Uh, I wouldn't do it.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, here's the thing. I can I can totally understand where he like what he's saying, where he's coming from as far as like the health risk, because she has heart disease that runs into her family that runs in her family, right? So, I mean, she he's probably witnessed family members who have died due to heart disease, and then he's probably looked at them and like they were overweight. So he's probably like that. It's a trigger for him. You know what I'm saying? It could be a trigger. And we don't know, we don't know what type, well, we're just gonna go out on the limb. We don't know what type of 260 she is. Like, is she just like like a super unhealthy 260?

SPEAKER_00:

Like too she's not deadly like you.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_00:

She's fine too. She oh she said she oh she's not doing nothing active.

SPEAKER_02:

He did say she wasn't doing anything.

SPEAKER_00:

She just round.

SPEAKER_02:

She just Demel. Stop. She's just round. You're such an asshole. She's just round. I'm just saying. No, she's just round.

SPEAKER_00:

And he probably and he probably guessed making 260. Because I Lord knows when you tell me how much you weighed, I said, Ain't no way you weigh that much.

SPEAKER_02:

But that's the thing. No one when I tell people how much I weigh, people are like, there's no, like, my friends, everybody, there's no way in hell. Yes, ma'am. It's just the way my body is built. And it's like, and then once I pick up a weight, it's just like my body just takes to it, and you know, that's genes, I guess. Um, but no, his his concern is is very is very real because I personally, you know, I have seen that concern on your face pertaining to me.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I looked at you a couple times. Ooh, Jesus, I need you around here. I can't I can't I can't be a single father.

SPEAKER_02:

You always gotta put you always gotta put fucking extras on it. You always have to put extras on it. And then when I come for you, your little feelings get hurt.

SPEAKER_00:

Not my little feelings.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, your little feelings get hurt. Okay. Okay. All right. Listen. Go ahead. The man has a valid concern to be concerned about his spouse and looking at her in. In the way of, like he said, I still find her attractive. I still think she's beautiful. It's just that she's not active, she's not eating well, she's on antidepressants, she's the mother of my son. And given her family history, and I've probably he's probably seen some of her family, like I said, croak over from heart disease, and they were probably obese. In his mind, that's just a direct. And he was like, I don't want to go through that. And I also don't want to sit back and watch you like do it slowly. Because genetics are real. Right. Genetics are real. Um, but on the same token, like I get where he's saying that he's done things to try to help her and to try to motivate her. And sometimes you saying the thing is not going to help. Maybe you just get into the habit of doing it. Maybe you just start doing meal prep, even if it's just for yourself. Just to start doing it.

SPEAKER_00:

But the meal prep ain't gonna help because he he said she ordering fast food.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, but what I'm saying is is that if he what I'm saying is it's like a parent, you want to model, you want to model what you want your children to pick up, right? So with some couples, some couples, not all couples, if you have one who gets on this like health path or health journey, then sometimes it can motivate the other partner to be like, you know what? My husband is getting up every day and going to the gym and he's only doing 30 minutes, or he gets up every day and he walks on the treadmill for 10 minutes. The least I can do is get up and do a jump rope where I can maybe that's where the inspiration needs to come from. Absolutely, Maurice.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, go next one, next one, next one. Next one, next one. Next one.

SPEAKER_02:

I love you. My baby dad didn't have any gifts for our kid to open on Christmas morning, but he had gifts for his girlfriend's kids, and I'm furious.

SPEAKER_00:

Let's go.

SPEAKER_02:

Hello. So I'm writing in because I am so upset and I don't know how to handle the situation without going off. My ex and I have been split up for four years now, and we have a kid together. For the past few years, I've had him every Christmas, but this Christmas, he asked if he could have him for Christmas, so I agreed. My ex has a girlfriend and has only been with her for about four months. She has four kids and moved in with him already. Anyway, I had my son Christmas Eve and did my Christmas with him, and his dad called and asked if he could have him that night to stay with him. I agreed and took him over. On the way over, the whole way there, my son was talking about how excited he was to go to his dad's and saying his dad had told him that he had gotten something really cool and he was so excited. The next day, I called my son and said, Merry Christmas, and asked what gifts he got. He said a PlayStation gift card and a Pokemon card he wanted, but neither one came in time. So his dad just showed him what he got, but he didn't have anything to actually open on Christmas Day, which is complete bullshit to me because he had all this time to get it. So why did he wait till the last minute? I asked what the other kids got, and he told me that all the kids had gifts to open and about three things a piece. I was furious when he told me this. I ended up talking to my ex's mom, and she told me that my ex had told her that he had spent about$300 on each kid, but only$150 on our kid because he's quote unquote too spoiled anyway. And he had already bought him a PS5 back in June, so that has to count as a Christmas gift. His girlfriend doesn't work, so I know it was all his money going towards her kids, and my ex makes really good money. His mom is angry about it too, but said that she doesn't know what to do about it. I was so angry Christmas Day, I was crying, just the thought of him watching the other kids getting to open gifts, and he had nothing. If I had known this, I would have told him that he could just stay with me on Christmas and he could have had stuff to open on Christmas morning. I haven't spoken to his dad about it yet because I didn't want to call on Christmas Day and start a big fight and cause issues for my kid. But it's been a few days now and I've cooled down, but I'm still really bothered because my son was hurt. How should I handle this? Should I say something? Should I let it go? I don't know. I'm just so angry and I don't know what to do.

SPEAKER_00:

Let that shit go. Let that shit go. Here's why I say that. One, the PlayStation gift card, maybe he said something wrong. That's automatic. You ain't got it.

SPEAKER_02:

They're both cards. You can't just No, no, no, no, no. The Pokemon card.

SPEAKER_00:

No, no, no, no, no. That Pokemon card, different. Stay in your lane. Stay in your lane. Stay in your lane. Because we don't know what kind of Pokemon card he got. Okay. Now he got him some limited edition. That now that Pokemon card may be worth more than$300 depending on what Pokemon called.

SPEAKER_02:

No, he said he already said he only spent$150.

SPEAKER_00:

But it may be worth more. He may have got it for just because he spent he spent less than that. That card may be worth more. Because I got cards upstairs right now that's worth more than what I paid for them.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. Is it enough to pay the house off? Yeah, I might.

SPEAKER_00:

If I put them all together, maybe.

SPEAKER_02:

Especially that that so now I need to know why you're slacking.

SPEAKER_00:

Especially that incredible Hulk.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I need to know why you're slacking.

SPEAKER_00:

Because I'm not finna sell my shit for you. That's for my babies. My grandbabies. My grandbabies are gonna be sent. Bye to man. So I think you should just let it go. Because he did have something and he his dad showed him something. Now, because I feel like she's she's hung up on the on that on the act of him physically opening something, but it's not like his dad didn't get him anything. Now, did he have time? Yes, he had more than ample time. Do men procrastinate? Yes, we do. I'm not cutting him slack on that, but he did get the child something. So I don't think it's as big of a deal as you're trying to make it seem. And if the kid kind of like forgave him, you kind of just kind of let it roll roll because that's the relationship between him and his father, since y'all got nothing to do with each other. And how he spent his money on them other kids ain't none of your damn business.

SPEAKER_02:

It's not, however, go ahead.

SPEAKER_00:

Shoot us, shoot us.

SPEAKER_02:

Excuse me. It's not about shooting Bill.

SPEAKER_00:

Uh-huh. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_02:

You had your own biological child sitting there on Christmas morning with nothing to open. And you talk. You asked for him, but you knew he wasn't gonna have anything to open up. No.

SPEAKER_00:

No, no, no.

SPEAKER_02:

Listen, he picked him up on Christmas Eve.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, babe.

SPEAKER_02:

At night. He did. Hold on. At night. He did. Wasn't no mail running, Maurice. The mail wasn't gonna run on Christmas Day. He didn't have the PlayStation card. He didn't let me finish. Let me finish. He did not have the PlayStation card. He did not have the Pokemon card, right? Right? Okay. Okay. So you wanted just to spend time with him on Christmas, which is like that that could be cool too. Like maybe I could have brought him by Christmas morning. You could have seen him and get to spend time. But for you to ask for to have him on Christmas morning, and then for you to sit there and watch him, watch him sit on that couch and watch the other kids actually physically open gifts. Think about it from the child's perspective. You're thinking about it from the adult perspective. You're thinking about it from the dad's perspective. Like who he did get him some. Think about it from the child's perspective. Now imagine, imagine your kid sitting on the couch. Okay.

SPEAKER_00:

This ain't about my baby.

SPEAKER_02:

No, I'm saying, I'm just saying, for just hypothetical, but imagine your kid sitting on the couch. And like I asked for her to come to my house for Christmas, and I'm like, oh yeah, I got you something, but it didn't get here in time. But she gotta sit here and watch the other kids open up, and it doesn't matter if it's one gift, they get to open something.

SPEAKER_00:

Again, I say, like I said, I cut him no bail for not having it there on time, but he did get him something. And maybe, maybe he didn't have it to open them, but maybe you're missing the point though to mail. The point you're saying is that he had to watch other kids that he's not related to opening kids at his daddy's house. But his dad, I I feel like his daddy is still making his daddy, he made the effort. Now, granted, he failed. He made the effort because he ordered the stuff.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, last minute, which makes me feel like now I'm an afterthought. Because here's the thing I'm gonna say 90% of the gifts were probably ordered anyway, right? Their shit got there on time. That's crazy work. That's crazy work. The kids that are not his, their shit got there on time. Their shit got there on time, whether he would have picked it up, whether he ordered it or not, their shit got there on time.

SPEAKER_00:

But again, there's no proof that he was actually the one that bought the gifts. And I'm pretty sure they mama get some money for them. I'm pretty sure they mama bought them some of them gifts. Okay. So no, you're not gonna just put all that on that man like like they mama didn't buy a game.

SPEAKER_02:

If the if okay, even if the let's just say the PlayStation. I'm not gonna argue. It's a gift card, is it not? It's a gift card? Yes. It's a gift card?

SPEAKER_00:

That part is wild. But the Pokemon card. It's a gift card? The Pokemon card.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, so like I said, what I say, Standard on the phone. What I say, stands. Um, last one. Last one, because you're getting on my nerves.

SPEAKER_00:

But then again, as a woman wrote that, and she don't understand how. You're getting on my nerves.

SPEAKER_02:

You're getting on my nerves, so we're gonna pass on. Last one. Yeah. My boyfriend who's 30 laughed at my marriage deadline.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, I would have laughed too.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, let's see. My boyfriend who's 30 laughed at my marriage deadline. We've been together for three years. He still gets uncomfortable and fidgety when I bring up commitment. He said it is quote unquote scary sometimes. And he gets angry at me for bringing it up and almost walks away. One of his conditions for marriage was to live together first. I'm opposed to this for religious and family expectation reasons. But eventually I gave in. Telling my family about our move decision was and still is awkward. But he said that if we're still strong after two to three months, he'd start taking things more seriously. That's odd. Um three months has passed, no changes. I told him a couple of times that I would need to know before the end of the lease, but felt like my words weren't being digested. I texted him my timeline explicitly. At this point, he got incredibly upset that I was caging him, even though I made my courtship rules very well laid out at the beginning of our relationship. He said he'd wait past my deadline out of spite. Okay, okay. I'd given him nine months' warning and he still accused me of leaving him. He said if I was going to think that way, that I should leave the room and start packing and selling off my things now. Do it. I'm telling, I'm telling this because I love him and I don't want to lose him. But meanwhile, I feel like I'm losing myself. Everything I do is either quote unquote wife material or quote unquote not wife material, as if he's always measuring me up. It's exhausting aiming to be a better version of myself, giving wife benefits, but having no deeper discussions than we did three years ago. I know that I'm still young, attractive, and doing well in my career, and I want to get settled down with the family by a comfortable, not time-sensitive age. He says that I'm being unreasonable. He says he already wants me. He says that he already wants me, but needs to be 99% sure of me before pulling out a ring. I feel silly for being the one chasing. I've been questioning my own value a lot. I'm not perfect because if I show, oh, I'm trying not to be perfect because if I show any attitude, it sets us to, it sets us two steps back. Conversations, ultimatums, none of it's working. I don't know what to do. What would you do if you loved someone like this? Walk away. Oh, girl. I would walk away. I was gonna say, I would walk away. I'm gonna say if he feels free of open the case. Hello. Let him fly. Let him fly. Be free. What happened to that boy? Girl. Girl, I would be, I would be getting my Q luggage. Every day. I stop by Barnes and Noble and get me a good book and a cup of Joe.

SPEAKER_00:

Every every day she stayed there. She's chipping away at her own self-comfort.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, like that's what she said. She's questioning herself, and now she said, I feel like I'm losing myself. Baby, if you if you're already feeling like you're losing yourself and he hasn't even proposed, and he's he's telling you he's not gonna propose.

SPEAKER_00:

And I'm gonna say this. I'm gonna say this. I'm gonna say this. You gotta stand on business. If you don't stand on business now, even it's gonna be 10 more years down the line, y'all gonna be boyfriend and girlfriend, and you're gonna still be waiting.

SPEAKER_02:

And if you let if you let if you let him shenan once, he's gonna shenanigan? He will shenan again.

SPEAKER_00:

Because I should I shenan every chance I get.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, if he if you let him, if you let a mother shenanig once, not you cussing, he'll shenan again.

SPEAKER_00:

Now, here, let me tell you this. Stop wasting your time. This man don't want you.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, he does, he doesn't.

SPEAKER_00:

And even if he any even if he does want you, he don't understand how much he wants you.

SPEAKER_02:

And this is- And this, what you need to do is leave so he can realize it makes the heart grow fonder. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

But what you need, go out there and get you a young thing, because you're younger than him.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, she's 25. He's 30. But like, she's also thinking about her biological. Yeah, she got a clock.

SPEAKER_00:

Women got a timeline.

SPEAKER_02:

She likes listen, we gotta get these babies going.

SPEAKER_00:

Because my my own father has shown me that I can have kids in my 50s, because he did. And I said, that's what's wild.

SPEAKER_02:

There's men who have kids in their 70s.

SPEAKER_00:

I said, it's wild that you call me so much you got somebody pregnant in your 50.

SPEAKER_02:

That is crazy work.

SPEAKER_00:

Tomorrow you got a little sister on the way. No to fucking.

SPEAKER_02:

No, I don't. I don't. Look, your other children might. I don't. I only know the ones that are already here on earth.

SPEAKER_00:

Y'all think I'm bullshit. I have a sister. We have a 19-year gap. I am not. My baby sister, Maya, I love her to death.

SPEAKER_02:

But wait, is that just I just saw a video on TikTok and she was surprising her two, her two kids, they're older. Her daughter's like 17, her son is like 18. He finna get ready to go to college. And she showed them the pregnancy test, and they both like looked at her like with an attitude. And the son said, he was like, Well, I'm finna leave. And she was like, Where are you going? He was like, I'm leaving for college. He said, So good luck with that. Yeah. And the daughter was like, I'm not doing it. She was like, I already, because she already has a six-year-old brother. And she was like, I already watch him. She was like, I'm not doing it.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm not gonna do it.

SPEAKER_00:

Ma'am, ma'am, ma'am, leave. Stop wasting your time.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, don't waste your time. It's ridiculous.

SPEAKER_00:

But here's the thing: you've already moved your morals once by moving in with them.

SPEAKER_02:

And you and that's why you feel like you're losing yourself because you're constantly changing who you are to accommodate him. Somebody who ain't changing. But he still he still isn't trying to make an inch towards what you guys have discussed or what you want, but you're the one that's constantly having to chip away, chip away, chip away, chip. And then every time you chip away, he still says, That's not quite it yet. And then you chip away a little bit, and then he goes, Um, maybe almost there, but not quite here that. And that that's why you just need to walk away, girl. It's it's not worth it. Just now walking it out. Hey, now walking it out.

SPEAKER_00:

What's that walking it out? East, not the bird.

SPEAKER_02:

What happened to that boy? What happened to flew away? All right, guys. Let's hop into the comment of the week.

SPEAKER_00:

Now look here, y'all. I couldn't even go through all these comments. There's a lot.

SPEAKER_02:

What is this in response to? This one, okay.

SPEAKER_00:

We have a lot of comments today, okay? I I I pulled a lot. Y'all had me in tears. Okay. These first two, it's more than a lot. I'm I'm gonna put all the one of the difference, y'all. These first two come from the video about the little girl that was biting, kicking, and and oh, and the friend said her daughter, her son, or her daughter would never go near her.

SPEAKER_02:

No, her son would never go near her daughter, her friend's daughter.

SPEAKER_00:

Because her friend told her to raise her boy to be a to be a man and not gonna be. The first comment comes from Rashad Unders underscore Snow. He said the little psychopath needs to see a be needs to be seen a therapist, and it's true. I think about that. A lot of y'all said the old girl controller is psychath as well. Uh now she may be on a spectrum. She may be, but she needs a belt on her ass. That's what I think she needs.

SPEAKER_02:

Or she just needs better guidance and direction. The second comment that was right under his comment said You can be a bitch at a very young age, and this sounds like that. Nope, you keep your child away from me and mine. Not you can be a bitch at a very young age.

SPEAKER_00:

And I and I like that. I saw that immediately.

SPEAKER_02:

I just I could just picture her saying that with a straight face, like, no, you can be a bitch at a really young age.

SPEAKER_00:

And that's from what's her name?

SPEAKER_02:

Uh Tabia 107.

SPEAKER_00:

Loved it.

SPEAKER_02:

You can be a bitch from a very young age.

SPEAKER_00:

Now look here, y'all. The rest of these come from the um posts about um the family vacation.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, where they wanted the brother to pay for everything. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

Now look here. If I read your comment, you are officially part of the petty committee. Bye. Goodbye. They were giving. This first one comes from Pope Mope. He says he laughing out loud at the petty. They did it, you fittdy it.

SPEAKER_02:

Wild. People are unhinged. People are unhinged.

SPEAKER_00:

And this one comes from Teresa. Teresa said, stay at the same hotel too.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. The hotel that they wanted that they wanted you to pay for to book for them. Just stay at that hotel.

SPEAKER_00:

So make sure you keep the same itinerary. Right? Yeah, because I'm I'm gonna go. Look, okay. Now this is from YouTube. She uh this person says, uh uh, you fly solo, says, the only people I'm sponsoring, they're quoting me. The only people I'm sponsor are the people that with my last name that I that I come in or that came out of my wife.

SPEAKER_02:

I can't.

SPEAKER_00:

And I that's a fact to this day. That's a fact. Right? And then she's just me, me says, I'm blocking everybody in the group chat.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Right. Yeah. Like y'all don't have to worry about me no more. Y'all inviting me to pay for y'all trip and not invite me because y'all want to spend time with me is wild.

SPEAKER_00:

That's wild. Hold on. And then black, black onyx said, book them all a fight on Spirit Airline. And if they make it to the destination, if they make it.

SPEAKER_02:

If they make it, I would book it and then cancel all that shit at the last minute when they get to the airline.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, and my my my top, this is my personal favorite from a custom underscore 76. Stay at home, broke ass.

SPEAKER_02:

The fuck. That was funny. Stay up, broke ass at home. You can't go on a trip.

SPEAKER_00:

Welcome all to the petty committee.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh, we we're gonna have shirts coming uh merchandise coming soon. If you would like to be a part of the uh honorary uh petty committee, honorary member of the petty committee.

SPEAKER_00:

We gotta start our own hashtag. Goodness gracious.

SPEAKER_02:

Petty does it. Petty does it.

SPEAKER_00:

Y'all we appreciate y'all. This is that. Uh I'm gonna tell you what's funny.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. But this has been another episode of the Life After I Do podcast. If you are not doing so already, you already know the rundown. Follow us at Life After I Do Podcast on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and um YouTube. Almost forgot. Don't forget you do know the rundown. Don't forget. Do you know the Muffin Man? The Muffin Man? The Muffin Man that lives on Drury Lane? Yes.

SPEAKER_00:

She's married to the Muffin Man.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye. Um, you can also write into the podcast at LifeAfterI DoPodcast at gmail.com. We love, love down bad seeing y'all, seeing y'all write into us.

SPEAKER_00:

And once again, people, I want to let you guys know for all of you guys who are listening and replying to us or via the text message through the fan mail through the um through the host of the podcast. Oh, yeah. You cannot reply to fan mail.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

So another person asked me today how to submit a story. I'm sorry. We cannot apply to fan mail. Reply to fan mail, but you can write into the podcast. Yes.

SPEAKER_02:

At lifeafter I do podcast at gmail.com. So we love, I'm telling y'all, we love getting y'all down bad. Down bad. Down bad. And here's the new year, guys. We got some fun things planned for the new year. In the new year, we hope to be getting some merch to you guys. So there's a lot of fun things happening. Goodbye. There's a lot of fun things. Hopefully, that'll be taken place. Not hopefully. That will be taking place. Right. Okay? We want to keep the party bus going.

SPEAKER_00:

That's a train, not a bus.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, honk, honk.

SPEAKER_00:

I don't know. I don't know. That was an old call.

SPEAKER_02:

That was a clonker. All right, guys. I'm finna get my wing stopped.

SPEAKER_00:

Um, so you just like the wife.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. Shut up. I went to the gym today. First of all. First of all, I went to the gym today. And I'm gonna and I'm gonna make it fit into my macros.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, you'll make it fit?

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna make it fit.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, yeah, you will.

SPEAKER_02:

Until next time, guys. We'll see you in the new year. Peace, Buskies.

Head Shot

Kynesha Gill

Host
Head Shot

Morice Gill

Host