Life After I Do Podcast

Our 2 Cents Vol. 25

• Life After I Do • Season 1 • Episode 114

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A week of coughs, errands, and hair-wash day becomes the backdrop for an honest look at how love really shows up when life gets messy. When one partner is sick and the household load suddenly shifts, the small tasks reveal the biggest truths about care, commitment, and showing up for each other when you’re not at 100%. That real-life moment launches us into four listener stories that push the limits of boundaries—from a “friend” suggesting shared partners, to the myth of being “the prize” without contributing, to houseguests who disrespect your home, and the spouse’s best friend who hides bullying behind jokes.

In this conversation, we break down privacy versus secrecy, reciprocity in relationships, house standards that protect your peace, and the importance of public protection inside a partnership. With practical scripts, boundary-setting tools, and relatable humor, this episode gives you language and confidence to stand firm with friends, family, and even your partner when lines get crossed. After listening, ask yourself: What boundary are you recommitting to this week?

Thanks for rocking with us! Don’t forget to follow Life After I Do so you never miss an episode. Got a relationship situation you want us to weigh in on? Hit us at https://linktr.ee/lifeafteridopodcast — we just might talk about it in a future episode.

SPEAKER_00:

Pissed me the hell off.

SPEAKER_04:

How the fuck are you embarrassed that I defend myself? Right.

SPEAKER_01:

But you not embarrassed that this bitch has been talking about me but for the last two years. But when she brings the fuck out of here.

SPEAKER_02:

When she brings it to his attention, his response is that's different. She's my best friend. Thanks for doing it. Hey Booski. Hi, Booski. How you feeling? Uh better than I have been in the past 72 hours.

SPEAKER_04:

He was down bad.

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, I'm still down, but I'm not down as bad as I was.

SPEAKER_04:

You will go sound like a smoker. I don't know what's wrong with me today. Cut it out. My little something in my throat.

SPEAKER_02:

Cut it out. Cut it out. No. Okay.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. You're doing too much.

SPEAKER_02:

You're doing way too much. I said, my poor baby, sick? Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Got the sickness.

SPEAKER_02:

And it just sucks because I don't get sick very often.

SPEAKER_04:

Right.

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, so I guess.

SPEAKER_04:

Wait, wait, that's not true. You get sick a lot.

SPEAKER_02:

With what?

SPEAKER_04:

Actually, no, you don't get sick a lot. I get sick a lot.

SPEAKER_02:

Why?

SPEAKER_04:

Because I got a sickness for the thickness. Bye.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, don't make me laugh because it makes me cough. Um, but I guess it, you know, it's it's good. It's good. Um, because, you know, I need out the system. No, my body needs to develop new defenses. So I shh, you know, I got my my new defenses.

SPEAKER_04:

At first, when you told me you were sick, I was like, damn, my baby's sick. But I was like, look at God. Because we were just talking about how you felt like you needed a delo week. I said, Okay. I said, now you're gonna delay all the way.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Because now you're not gonna use none of them muscles. Wow.

SPEAKER_02:

Not you over here praying for my downfall. Oh my god. That's crazy work.

SPEAKER_04:

I just wanted you to heal. You always talk about you talking about this hurt, that hurt. I said, you're the person I know that lift every day or everything hurt.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, apparently it comes with a territory. That's what I'm told. Apparently. Apparently. But yeah, on Sat, what was it, Saturday? Saturday morning, I woke up and my um my ear was really itchy. My right ear. Yeah. It started with the itchy right ear. And I was like, damn, my ears are itchy for like my right ear. And then it went to my other.

SPEAKER_01:

What's talking about you?

SPEAKER_02:

Um, I don't know. And then by the time I like as I was getting ready, and by the time I got to the gym, my uh right nostril was like on fire, like burning. Tearing your ass up. Yeah, and I was talking to my friend and she was like, What's what's wrong? And I was like, girl, my right nostril is on fire. And she was like, why? And I was like, I don't know, it must be my sinuses. So then that was what Saturday. And then by that evening is when I started feeling it.

SPEAKER_04:

Like because you woke up Sunday, you were.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, and Sunday I was just I was down bad.

SPEAKER_04:

And I was like, go over there.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. Well, the only reason why you were able to say go over there is because the week before I had bounced back, he was sick. And then this this past week, I've been sick. So now I gotta like triple and uh double down on the kid because I'm like, uh, could we be expecting this next week with her? Like, I don't think she's going to get sick. I I pray to God she doesn't because I don't like when my baby don't fall.

SPEAKER_04:

She was already sick and she was asymptomatic. Okay. And she came in here talking about I just want to love my parents. You you still hate No Ma Baby.

SPEAKER_02:

He he he ever since, okay, when we all had got COVID, what was it in 2022, 21? We all had got COVID, but she was uh we were all positive, but she was asymptomatic. So she was like going about business as usual, and him and I were both down bad. And I'm grateful that she was asymptomatic. Like I'm I'm so grateful that she was able to just ride it out.

SPEAKER_04:

If you haven't had COVID, that it when to feel like you're dying and to have a toddler on a on a thousand.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh yeah, it was it was tough. Oh my god. It was tough.

SPEAKER_04:

It was a couple times I was like, Lord.

SPEAKER_02:

But luckily, luckily, when um when I felt like I was um getting sick, this was back in 2022, I was literally at the doctor in the doctor's office. And um I just got like, it was like a wave of fatigue. And then just, you know how when you just know you're about to get sick, like before you actually become symptomatic.

SPEAKER_04:

I'll see you.

SPEAKER_02:

Um you know you're about bye, you know you're about to be sick. And in the doctor's office, I was like, let me put another mask on. And I like literally in the doctor's office, I put another mask on.

SPEAKER_04:

You was mass heading.

SPEAKER_02:

And um, yeah, I put another mask on. I called my friend to come um pick my daughter up because I still needed to do my doctor appointment and everything. I left the doctor's appointment. I went and got um like soup and everything. I came home, I made a huge pot of spaghetti. Like I knew, I felt it coming. And I made a huge spot uh pot of spaghetti. I had snacks and everything going, and then I went down, then you had went down, and then we got tested and it came back. We were all positive. But because I had like prepped all that stuff, like we quarantined in the upstairs bedroom, I had everything laid out for her. And she like, you know, she had her food and everything because we prepped that stuff, but that was for her. Yeah, well, we didn't eat anything because the only thing we were eating was watermelon. Yeah, that's the only thing we eat.

SPEAKER_04:

That's the only thing we could hold down, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

And then I couldn't stand for more than five minutes at a time. Like after that five minute mark, I was like, oh, I'm dizzy.

SPEAKER_04:

You sit down in the shower, I say it's bad.

SPEAKER_02:

It's bad. I can't I couldn't stand up. Couldn't stand up. Right. So um, yeah, so then this time with my with my cold, I know it's probably because you know, we've been around a lot more people than we normally do. We had a house full of people and everything.

SPEAKER_04:

I don't host nothing.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Right. Because it it but it's nor it it happens, it's the season and then.

SPEAKER_04:

It only happens when we host something. No, it doesn't. So I think the universe is trying to tell us don't host nothing else.

SPEAKER_02:

No, don't host another. But I'm feeling much I'm feeling much better today. Like I still feel like I'm, you know, I still have stuff to get through, but at least uh today I was able to get up. I was able to straighten up.

SPEAKER_04:

My question is, sorry to cut you off. My question is, are you gonna get on the SERMASTE tomorrow?

SPEAKER_02:

Uh probably not, because don't don't make me laugh. Because I was feeling like yesterday, I was like, what did I tell you yesterday? I was like, I think I might need to go to urgent care and get a breathing treatment. And I hadn't, I didn't come downstairs for what, two days almost? And so when I finally came downstairs, I came downstairs, I tried, I like made myself something to eat because you were gone and stuff, and I had texted you and I was like, Why am I out of breath just walking around the house?

SPEAKER_04:

I will say this though. All your friends ride for you.

SPEAKER_02:

Why?

SPEAKER_04:

Because every one of your friends I ran to ran into.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, everybody asked about me?

SPEAKER_04:

Everybody asked about you, and they're like, as you should, as the husband, you need to be taking care of her. Oh, when you were out running the air and today, today when I saw Michelle when I was picking up a feet from school, she doubled down. You bet I hope you better be taking good care of my girl. I said, calm down. Okay. She wants for nothing. She needs for a lot. I mean, she she needs for nothing. She wants for a lot. Bye. No, I will say I live by I live by a line where you'll never need for anything. I don't care if all of them wants.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye. I I will say, I will say thank you.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, and you welcome.

SPEAKER_02:

Because you really, like, you really husband and father.

SPEAKER_04:

This week. Like it's rough.

SPEAKER_02:

It was rough. He even washed hair, y'all. Now, I don't even, I don't even think you've ever washed her hair. Like, not since she's been like a big kid, like when she was a baby.

SPEAKER_04:

I don't, but I was fully prepared to blow dry and break it too.

SPEAKER_02:

But even she was nervous. Yeah, she was like, She was like, she came into the room and she was like, Mom. I was like, Yeah, um, dad said he's gonna wash my hair. And I was like, Yeah, I was like, Are you okay with that? You can't do it, yeah, right. I was like, are you I was like, are you not okay with daddy washing your hair?

SPEAKER_04:

She was like, no, no, don't get it wrong. She has no problem with me seeing her in the nude.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye.

SPEAKER_04:

Because I try to tell her the time Phoenix put some clothes on.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, she doesn't know, babe.

SPEAKER_04:

But her problem was make sure you don't get no soap. My mommy does, uh oh my god. All I heard the whole time. Mommy does this. Mommy has me the time sometimes. Mommy does it this way. Oh no, you're putting too much. Ma'am, I'm running this, okay? I'm running this.

SPEAKER_02:

But that remember, like I said, I tried to set you up for success. I was like, let her do the first go. Yeah. Because she likes to feel like she, you know, she's in the house.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, mommy lets me wash my hair the first time by myself. And then you come in. I'll I'll call you when I'm ready.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. I'll call you when you're ready. When she's ready. Okay, I guess I work for you. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, she has proven all week that I work for her. Bye. So my week, people, has been stressful and very busy. I have been more tired this week.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh gosh, than you were when you were sick last week.

SPEAKER_04:

Then I have right in a long time. Bye. I have a new appreciation for what she does. I said, I don't want to do this shit. I'm sick of this attitude. And not only am I getting attitude from the child, I'm getting attitude from this one because she hurt because she's short because she don't want to deal with nothing. I wasn't giving you attitude. I'm a good patient. You you are a passive aggressive patient.

SPEAKER_02:

What did I do that was passive aggressive?

SPEAKER_04:

I mean, I if I had to get it myself, I just get it myself.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, I did not say that. That's because you first you started the day off.

SPEAKER_04:

And then you was like, then didn't you hit me with the am I gonna get my soup?

SPEAKER_02:

Well, because that I was gonna say, you you came out your I didn't even ask. You were like, oh, I was gonna get you your Albundiga soup uh for dinner. And I was like, oh my gosh. I was like, you took the thoughts right out of my head. Like, look at you reading my mind.

SPEAKER_04:

It's really not hard to keep a woman happy. All you got all you gotta do is feed her, feed her her favorite food and get out her way. That's it.

SPEAKER_02:

And then you were like, um, then you uh tried to retract it and was like, oh, you know. You're like, I'm just I'm just gonna cook. So of course I'm gonna instantly get an attitude because I don't feel good, and then you already offered me a comfort food that I know that I wanted, and then you tried to retract it and be like, oh, I'm gonna cook. I don't want whatever you're gonna cook. Long story short, but you got my soup, so I was happy.

SPEAKER_04:

Long story short, people, I end up getting the soup and then cooking for myself. Because I bought just enough soup for her, because I didn't want that shit.

SPEAKER_02:

But I shared my soup. So my week was like I couldn't even finish it because I like in my mind I was hungry, but then when I started eating, I was like, I knew you wouldn't get that much.

SPEAKER_04:

That's why, that's why I was like, that's why I was really mad they didn't tell her in the small.

SPEAKER_02:

No, it's only it's only one size.

SPEAKER_04:

I knew you weren't gonna eat a large. Um so my week was exhausting.

SPEAKER_02:

Dealing, uh, you know, wearing being a husband and a father.

SPEAKER_04:

That's that part wasn't exhausting. I had to put on the mother roll. Okay. That's I said, mmm. It's a lot, huh? I said, if if if uh if if she's sick one more day, I'm gonna start having moose wings.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, don't have me hurt you. I don't I don't want to be violent. I'm gonna have to go get me a cold.

SPEAKER_04:

I'm gonna have to give me a cold drink and a beverage, give me a cold drink and some food and sit behind micros. I now I understand. I gotta get away from these Negroes because they trim it.

SPEAKER_02:

Now I understand. You get it now, huh?

SPEAKER_04:

Everything I got comfortable. Babe, get comfortable again. Dad.

SPEAKER_02:

Pick up drop off, appointments, hold on, errands. It's the errands, ain't it?

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, it is. It's the errands, ain't it? This is the thing about picking up a drop-off. So now, since I've been picking the drop off, now I go and I park, I park up the hill. Uh-huh. So now she's like, oh, Dad, I told you I don't like walking. Man, we're gonna walk up this hill because I'm not finna carry you. Well, you're gonna carry my backpack. I will carry your backpack for you if you ask politely. I said, you know, she's spoiled.

SPEAKER_02:

I thought she likes doing the hill. Is it the hill that's in the school or the hill that's walking down the hill?

SPEAKER_04:

And then she let the car to be right there. Oh, okay. She doesn't want to have to walk down the street. Oh, okay. I've been parking down the street to get my steps.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, yeah. She don't she don't want to do all that, Maurice. After school. She's been at school all day.

SPEAKER_04:

I don't care about that. Wow. She'll do shit at school, we'll play. Morning recess, lunch recess. Bye. Second recess.

SPEAKER_02:

And then running Mount 100 Mile Club.

SPEAKER_04:

What we got today, Buskies?

SPEAKER_02:

Today it's an hour two cents episode.

SPEAKER_04:

Thank God, because I don't think she got the capacity to talk about an actual issue because she is not 100%.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't know if I have the capacity uh to read all this today. You might have to take.

SPEAKER_04:

No, we're not gonna have you take over because we'll be here all day. I'm about to uh bust out my hooked on phonics.

SPEAKER_02:

Wait a minute, did you see that uh I it was a TikTok and it was like she was sitting down reading the Bible, and it says what it's like when my wife reads, and it was uh Buster Ryan span in the background when he on the Chris Brown is like and then it says, then it switches to him, and it says verses when my husband reads, and he's holding a um a Dr. Seuss book, and it's the little boy's voice. Um, because like when you know, like um Okay, because like all right, go ahead and read these things because now you're about to piss me.

SPEAKER_04:

You're about to find a new way to piss me off.

SPEAKER_02:

Don't make me laugh, it's gonna make me cough.

SPEAKER_04:

You about to find a new way to piss me off.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, um, so let's let's let's get this party started, guys. Because I know y'all probably don't want to listen to my stuffiness for very much longer. Um, and plus I'm starting to get hot again. Oh, yeah, you are. Um, here we go. Um also excuse my reading because my eyes get a little foggy. Okay, look here.

SPEAKER_04:

If you can't do it, just do it.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh shut up. Okay, here we go. Am I the asshole for rejecting my friend's request to have an open relationship with my husband?

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, wow. This is crazy. That's bold.

SPEAKER_02:

We're starting off. That's bold. Okay, here we go. I'm a 30-year-old female and I've been married to my husband, who's 32 for five years. We have two beautiful kids, five and six, five-year-old male, six-year-old female, and have a very strong relationship and are happy together. Recently, my quote unquote friend Lisa, who's 29, confided in me that she has developed feelings for my husband. Bitch. She said that she finds him attractive and admires our relationship, and she asked if we could consider having an open relationship so that she could be with him too. I was shocked. I told her, no, explaining that my husband and I are committed to each other and that we are not interested in an open relationship. Lisa got upset and accused me of being selfish and closed-minded. She argued that today's modern relationships should be flexible and that I was denying her happiness. Since then, Lisa has been distant and has been spreading rumors in our friend group suggesting that I am overly possessive and controlling. This has caused a lot of tension, and some of our mutual friends are now taking sides. My husband is supportive of my decision, but I feel guilty for the drama it has caused. So am I the asshole for rejecting my friend's request to have an open relationship with my husband?

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, first of all. First of all, Lisa ain't your friend. Right. Fuck Lisa. Uh-huh. Let me talk about that. And what the fuck she means my husband is supportive.

SPEAKER_02:

Is he trying to convince her because he wants to save Lisa? No, he's support, he's supportive of her, like telling her Lisa no.

SPEAKER_04:

But does he want to tell? I want to know, does he want to tell Lisa no?

SPEAKER_02:

He he's saying, oh, you instead of him saying like absolutely not, he's just telling his wife, I support your decision. I'm not gonna now that you said that, I think that would run me the wrong way too. If you came to me and been like, I support your decision.

SPEAKER_04:

Like it should be my decision too. Right, so are you trying to uh is he trying to crack Lisa? That's my question.

SPEAKER_02:

Or maybe he never considered an open relationship, or maybe he has thought about an open relationship, but he knows first of all he knows that his wife wouldn't go for it.

SPEAKER_04:

People, this is this is what I mean when I say stop telling people about your relationship. Yeah, don't ever tell people don't I don't care if they're your friend. That's it. Do not divulge uh information about your marriage or your relationship to other people because now Lisa asks want to know what it's like. Yeah, Lisa won her turn on the ride.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, because Lisa's on the outside looking in, and like she said, I've developed feelings for your husband, but I also admire you guys' relationship, and I just want to know if you wouldn't mind sharing that with me. No, ma'am.

SPEAKER_04:

No, Lisa 304.

SPEAKER_02:

No, no, no, we're not gonna share. Yes, I mind.

SPEAKER_04:

That's not your friend.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. I mean, but bold, bold, bold enough on Lisa's part to even come to her friend and say some shit like that.

SPEAKER_04:

But now she's starting messing in the group chat, and now you got friends picking sides.

SPEAKER_01:

First of all, first of all, what are there different sides? Right. I want to know the rationale between the sides.

SPEAKER_02:

She said that Lisa's 29. So would that make her a Gen Zer? I don't, it doesn't matter. I'm just trying to think.

SPEAKER_04:

I don't I don't care how old you are. Yeah. If she's over 18, she's available for these hands.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye.

SPEAKER_04:

Goodbye.

SPEAKER_02:

She's available for these hands. She's open business. No, if a friend came to me and and said some shit like that, I would just say. Oh no, which one? Okay. Don't don't make me hurt you. Don't make me hurt you. Don't make me hurt you. Which one?

SPEAKER_04:

You want me to get a list?

SPEAKER_02:

Go ahead. You've always told me I've never it's for you. Like my friends aren't your type.

SPEAKER_04:

They're not. They're really not. Lord knows. None of them. Zero.

SPEAKER_02:

How many?

SPEAKER_04:

Zero.

SPEAKER_02:

I feel like we've we've both had that conversation. Zero. Because I've said the same thing about him.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I got a couple.

SPEAKER_02:

Not that are my type.

SPEAKER_04:

That you would know.

SPEAKER_02:

No, I wouldn't. Do I know them? Or are these friends that you've kept from me? I know them. No. What about the? That was a test that you passed. Oh, I was like, See, that was. I literally started thinking about all your friends. And I was like, none of them.

SPEAKER_04:

So now you're thinking about the niggas.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Goodbye. And the non-niggers.

SPEAKER_02:

And the non-niggas. Right, right. Because that's that's exactly what that was going to my mind. Because I was like, it's definitely at first, at first it remembered I was like, it's definitely not the niggas. And then like the second I was like, I started thinking about the non-niggers, then I was like, definitely not them either. So who could it be?

SPEAKER_04:

Next one.

SPEAKER_02:

Who could it be talking about? I was gonna say something else, I'm not gonna say it. I love you. Um okay, let's move on.

SPEAKER_04:

Not you trying to trigger me. I'm not you are okay.

SPEAKER_02:

What?

SPEAKER_04:

Clean your throat before you read the next one.

SPEAKER_02:

Shut up. My throat, my throat's getting scratchy. Let me let me drink some water. Hold on, guys.

SPEAKER_04:

I love when you put your maffer in that bottle.

SPEAKER_02:

Maybe you should edit that out so they don't have to like listen to me gulp down my water.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I'm gonna leave that in there. They need to hear the gulp. So they know why I'm here.

unknown:

Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye, Maurice. All right, here we go. Am I the asshole for bursting out laughing when she told me what she brought to our relationship? Okay. Um yeah, it says this one's for like shits and gigs. Okay. Um, I apologize for the mouthful of the title. I was just trying to be as descriptive as possible. No worries. I'm a 25-year-old male and I've been dating my girlfriend Jen, who's a 24-year-old female for nine months. Five months ago, Jen lost her job when her company went under, and around the same time, she had a falling out with her roommate. She was in urgent need of housing but in an awkward position with employment status. So she reluctantly asked if she could move into my house. I agreed because she had already spent the night several times, and she moved in under the condition that she would be looking for work to contribute. Now, back on our second date, when I asked Jen if she wanted to be exclusive, she responded by asking me what I would bring to the relationship with her. I answered as pragmatically as possible. I said, a stable income, loyalty, companionship, willingness to compromise, and consistent attention to my appearance and my hygiene. I didn't really care much for the question at the time. And so while she seemed mildly satisfied with what I said, I didn't bother asking her the same in return. I feel like I've held up my end of the bargain. But after moving in, Jen only really looked for work for about two weeks. She now spends the majority of her time and her waking hours on Instagram and TikTok and Netflix. Well, I think I know her. I've raised the issue with her indirectly before by asking her how the job search was going, and she said nobody was hiring, which I find hard to believe. Well, yesterday in the evening, I finally hit my limit. Jen drank a bottle of wine that I was saving for a romantic evening date and spent the rest of her day screwing around on her phone. After work, I sat her down and I asked what she thought she was bringing to our relationship. Okay, let's get it. Jen stared at me for a few seconds as if I had asked the dumbest question in history of mankind. Then she erupted, frantically pointing at herself and screaming, Me, I'm the prize. Not on my couch. From my perspective, this was coming from a woman who had just gotten daydrunk off of wine, watched Netflix, and ate all of my food. I honestly couldn't contain myself, and I just burst out into laughter. Every time I looked back at her, she would give me this insidious look while shrugging, which only made me laugh even harder. Jen got really angry at me and let out this wailing shriek of a sound. She stormed off to another room where I'm 100% sure she just screwed around on her phone even more. I haven't talked to her since. I feel like I might have gone too far. Was I being an asshole? No.

SPEAKER_04:

Hell no. I love stories like this because I love it when it's reversed. Because had that been a no-good two-to-women nigga laying on the couch on the room. If the roles were reversed, if the role was reversed, I'ma sit down. The women in the comments will be going at his ass. I want the same energy in the comments from GZ. That's the same. I want the same energy. It's not the same. I want the same energy.

SPEAKER_02:

It's not the same.

SPEAKER_04:

No, everybody wants it. You want to be equal?

SPEAKER_02:

Uh listen, not everybody was on the same joke.

SPEAKER_04:

Look, look here. Y'all wanted woman's suffrage.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, bye. Okay, y'all. That's not the same thing. Stop it. That is not the same thing.

SPEAKER_04:

Y'all want equal rights. Cut it out. So I don't think you're an asshole at all. Like I said, if the roles were reversed, this would be a laughable situation. And every woman would tell you to put that man out. Right. So I'm going to keep the same energy. But you think he's going to put her out? He's not. He's not. He's not. Because I always say women get more grace than men. Strictly because y'all got a pair of titties.

SPEAKER_02:

But but now that she's been in the house, she hasn't worked, and she's just comfortable. She's comfortable. Yeah. And unless he's going to break up with her.

SPEAKER_01:

But what's crazy is how does she think she deprived? I can get more for my money off of Tinder. Because she's been looking. I can get more for my money off Tinder. I could at least I can send her home.

SPEAKER_02:

Because she's been looking on social media. And it told her.

SPEAKER_04:

That he should that he should want to take care of it.

SPEAKER_02:

She should just sit there and day drink. Okay. And not try to find a job.

SPEAKER_04:

Again, I say if though if the roles were reverse, I know.

SPEAKER_02:

The reaction, the reaction would probably be different.

SPEAKER_04:

It might be. Now I can see if she was sitting at home all day showing her phone, if she was throwing that shit down and cooking and throwing that shit down on the throwing it on.

SPEAKER_01:

But how you know she's not? She's not. How you know she not? Because they had time to talk.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. Bye, Maurice.

SPEAKER_01:

They shouldn't have been talking. They shouldn't have been fucking. Goodbye. That's the problem. If they was fucking instead of talking.

SPEAKER_02:

You're making my nose run.

SPEAKER_04:

He wouldn't have had time to bring it up. I'm just saying.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, here we go. Um, am I the asshole for kicking out my sister and her family because her son and her husband's entitlement?

SPEAKER_04:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm a 23-year-old female. My sister is 37. So it's her older sister. Um, have we've always had a rocky relationship, had our ups and downs, but we've always had each other's back. That's why when her house had a really bad flood, I offered to let her stay with me and my girlfriend in our house. We had enough space and we talked it through first. So my sister, her husband, and my 13-year-old nephew packed up their things and set camp to our house. My nephew and I have been fine, but he had this entitlement to him that always got on my nerves. Right off the bat, he tried to claim mine and my girlfriend's shared bedroom like it was some guest house. I politely told him that he couldn't stay in our bedroom and that he could stay either in the guest room or the TV room in our basement. He immediately got upset and demanded our room. My brother-in-law tried to mediate the situation, but the whole reason he wanted the room was so that he could have our TV for his gaming system. I showed him to the TV room in our basement and he relented and agreed to sleep downstairs. I was sort of relieved, assuming he would spend most of his time down there. It had only been a week before the issue started. My brother-in-law wouldn't clean up after himself. He would fill the sink with dirty dishes, leave his dirty laundry all over the house, and wouldn't clean up the bathroom after he used it. My nephew kept me and my girlfriend up all night with his screaming and yelling at his video games. I brought all these problems up to my sister and she just brushed it off by saying, They're just used to how things are at home. You ain't at home. Right. I told her that I ran things differently, but she wouldn't budge. After another week, my girlfriend asked me if the cat had thrown up somewhere downstairs because there was a very sour smell every time she went to do laundry. I looked around everywhere, but found nothing. Until I realized the smell was coming from my nephew. I almost gagged. He clearly hadn't showered in days. I talked to my sister and she tried the excuse of boys will just be boys, but I wasn't having it. I stormed downstairs and I told my nephew that he needed to have a shower ASAP. He threw a fit and started throwing empty soda cans and food containers at me while throwing curse words and insults at me. I brought up the issue to my sister, but all she did was try to quote unquote gentle parent, which was just him getting his way by cussing out his mother. By the first month, me and my girlfriend had finally had enough. During dinner, I brought up the issue that had been happening and now and how they were affecting me and my girlfriend. All three of them brushed it off and claimed that they were just too stressed. I bit my tongue, but I was fighting back, jumping across the table at my sister. The first month and a half of living with them was pure hell on earth. What immediately drew the line was me overhearing my brother-in-law on the phone with his friend. I tried not to listen until I heard him saying the most disrespectful and disgusting things about me and my girlfriend I have ever heard. My blood immediately boiled when I heard him say that he thought, quote, living with two gay chicks would be much hotter. I snapped and demanded him and my sister pack their things and leave my house immediately. He acted like he hadn't just completely disrespected me in my own home. My sister tried to defend him, saying that it was a joke. I refused to hear her out. I told her about her husband and her son's disgusting habits and entitlements and said that I refused to deal with it anymore. I gave her one day to get all of their stuff and leave before I did it myself. She immediately broke down in tears, claiming they had nowhere to go. I told her to get a hotel room, stay at a friend's, or hell, go to our parents' house anywhere but here. She called me cruel and heartless, but I didn't care. I couldn't take it anymore. I was exhausted. She called me a bitch and went to her guest room. I didn't care. I was just relieved to get them out. They packed their things and left. And my sister hasn't said much to me since. My girlfriend said that I did the right thing. But was I being an asshole? Hell no. Fuck all of them. Absolutely not. Fuck all of them. Absolutely not. It's your space. It's your home. Look here. I'm not going to be uncomfortable in my own home. I'm not going to be disrespected in my own home. And I I invited you into my home to help you and your family.

SPEAKER_04:

You don't even mean helpful.

SPEAKER_02:

And all you've taken my comedy. Most people, most people, the first thing that most people try to do when they're in your space is be, yeah, they try to be out of the way. Like that's like if you're in somebody else's space, you don't want, you don't want their everyday to be interrupted because you also probably know what it feels like to have people in your space. So usually they try to like stay out the way or they try to be more helpful or you know, like bring something. But you think just because we're sisters that you can, however you run your unruly household, you can bring that shit over here. Absolutely not. Here's my problem. Absolutely not.

SPEAKER_04:

First of all, let me double down by saying fuck all of them.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

I'm talking about the sister, her husband, and that bitch ass nephew of yours.

SPEAKER_02:

The stinky one?

SPEAKER_04:

Yes, his stinky ass. Fuck all of them. You don't come into someone's house and then try to dictate the terms in which you uh uh live in their house.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Or make excuses.

SPEAKER_04:

She's already doing you a solid by letting you stay here. Yep. She's doing more than what I would have done. Right. Because the first time the nephew would have would have would have talked back, you gotta go. Yep. And to sit here and say that I thought it'd be harder living with two days.

SPEAKER_00:

That's crazy work.

SPEAKER_01:

Are you trying to sleep with them? That's crazy work.

SPEAKER_02:

Now that makes me think, have you been trying to spy on us or something?

SPEAKER_04:

Right. Because my thing is, did you think something was gonna happen for you? What did you think would happen? Yeah, what did you think would happen? What's going on here? And then for the sister to just turn the previous to just turn a blind eye like, oh, they're oh, they're just used to being at home, but they're not at home.

SPEAKER_02:

That's the yeah, and you should have taken it.

SPEAKER_01:

But now that I know. That you don't give a fuck how about how you run your house? Yeah. And not only she's their maid. Right. She's their maid.

SPEAKER_04:

Not only does your husband don't understand boundaries, your son's getting raised the same way where he has no goddamn. Yeah. Because how the hell are you gonna demand my room? Bitch.

SPEAKER_02:

How you gonna come over here and be like, no, I'm gonna need this room because of this TV. How about be how about be glad that you're not sleeping in the car?

SPEAKER_04:

Look here, people. I'm gonna say this. I'm gonna say this one time. Gentle parody don't work for all these kids.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. Some of these kids. They need hands.

SPEAKER_04:

No, you no, you're right. They need hands. You gotta, you gotta put your I'm not gonna- You gotta put your foot down.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm not condoning both feet. I'm not condoning violence or abuse.

SPEAKER_04:

Abuse. I'm just saying, take it to the line.

SPEAKER_02:

Bye. Take it to the line.

SPEAKER_04:

Take it to the line. Like, like if this is abuse, take it right right here. To let them know that it's possible for me to get there.

SPEAKER_02:

Just to just to invoke enough fear. Yeah. Bye, Devil.

SPEAKER_04:

I'm just saying, this is wild. Yeah, it is. You're not an asshole.

SPEAKER_02:

No, you're definitely not an asshole.

SPEAKER_04:

And I would have sent her ass to mom and dad. Protect your home. I would have sent her ass to mom and daddy house a lot a lot sooner.

SPEAKER_02:

And you know what? I'm thinking, would I call mom and dad to let them know how they kidding? No, no, here's the thing. Or let them be just a surprise and let mom and daddy.

SPEAKER_04:

Daddy surprised. Yeah. Because here's what's gonna happen. Mama dad, like, I don't know why your sister would do that to you. But then once they're mom and dad's house for a while, Dad's gonna be like, Yeah, I just gotta go. Yeah, I gotta go. Because I guarantee you, yeah, daddy wouldn't put up with that shit. Yeah. And I guarantee you, had it been your parents' house, your husband would treat your parents differently.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, I would hope so. Oh, I know he will. I would hope so.

SPEAKER_04:

I know he would because because because dad is there. Yeah. And he knows dad can put the man's on his ass.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, here we go. Excuse me, guys.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh my God. Just sick.

SPEAKER_02:

What the? I am sick. I know. Go ahead. Okay, last one. Um, am I the asshole for telling my husband's best friend she's just not funny after years of jokes about me? Okay. Okay, so I'm Veronica and I'm a 31-year-old female. My husband Jake has his best friend named Melissa.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, never mind.

SPEAKER_02:

David's been friends since college, so like 10 plus years. Melissa has this thing where she makes jokes about me in front of people. And they're not actually funny, they're just mean. Jealousy. It started maybe two years ago when Jake and I got married. She made a comment at our wedding reception about how I finally locked him down, which, okay, whatever, wedding jitters or something. But then it just kept happening. Comments about my weight. Veronica, you're so brave to be wearing that. I could never. Comments about my cooking. Jake, you better keep takeout menus on hand. Comments about my job. I'm a cake decorator, and she's made multiple comments about how it's not a real career, but just a hobby that pays. And every single time, if I don't laugh or if I looked annoyed, she goes, I'm just kidding. God, you're so sensitive. So she is. Jake always says, that's just Melissa's sense of humor, and that I shouldn't take it personally. But like, how am I supposed to take it if not personally? She's literally making jokes about me. Anyways, this was Saturday, maybe Friday. We were at a barbecue at Jake's friend's house, a bunch of people there, and Melissa, obviously. I made a cake for the barbecue, red velvet with cream cheese frosting. People were complimenting it, saying that it was really good. I want to pee. Melissa goes, Yeah, Veronica's cakes are always so pretty. I just wouldn't trust her actual cooking, though, and laughed. And I just, I was just done. I said, You know what's funny, Melissa? You've been making these jokes about me for two years, and I've never laughed, not once. Maybe you're just not funny. Ah, that part. The whole group went quiet. Melissa's face went red and she said, Wow, okay. I was just kidding, but I guess you can't take a joke. I said, Or maybe you can't make one. Okay. She grabbed her stuff and left. Just left the barbecue. Jake was so mad at me on the drive home. Fuck Jake. Said that I embarrassed Melissa in front of everyone and that I was harsh, and she was just trying to be funny. Okay. I said she's been insulting me for two years, and you've never not once defended me. He said that's different. She's his best friend, and she doesn't mean anything by it. My best, my best friend says Melissa's been bullying me and uh bullying me, and Jake's been enabling it, and I should have said something way sooner. But some of Jake's friends are texting me saying that I was being too harsh, and Melissa's really hurt. Now I'm second guessing myself. Like maybe I should have just pulled her to the side privately or ignored it like I always do. But I also am kind of not sorry. Like I'm tired of being the punchline. Am I the asshole for calling her out? No.

SPEAKER_04:

No, let me tell you this. No. Let me go ahead and cook because I got a lot to say.

SPEAKER_02:

No, go ahead.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, first of all, fuck Jake.

SPEAKER_02:

That's her husband.

SPEAKER_04:

I know. I know. Fuck Jake. This shit ain't funny. And let me tell you what happened. Melissa is mad because Melissa was playing a long game, hoping that Jake would come around to pick her. And since Jake never not. And Jake, since Jake never picked her, her way is to try to make you look less appealing in Jake's eyes to make herself look better. So fuck Melissa. Okay? Yeah. And fuck Jake for not protecting you from your enemies.

SPEAKER_02:

Both foreign and domestic.

SPEAKER_04:

Exactly. And if you can't see it, now I understand a lot of times that men were naive to the gravity of the situation. And this may very much well be part of her normal uh behavior and personality.

SPEAKER_02:

Like that might, yeah, it might be her broken boundaries.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. Once you committed to this woman and say this is who you're marrying, boundaries should have been set. Yeah, you're right. And and for someone to constantly ridicule your wife, yeah, and you just sit there.

SPEAKER_02:

And not even like you could at least be like, all right, come on, Melissa, lay off. Like you don't even do that.

SPEAKER_00:

And then you, but for you not even pick them on the signal that she don't laugh.

SPEAKER_04:

Hold on, hold on. And then that's the part that really pissed me off.

SPEAKER_00:

That pissed me the hell off.

SPEAKER_04:

How the fuck are you embarrassed that I defend myself? Right.

SPEAKER_01:

But you not embarrassed that this bitch has been talking about me for the last two years.

SPEAKER_02:

But when she when she brings it to his attention, his response is that's different. She's my best friend. So are her feelings more important than mine?

SPEAKER_04:

She's your best friend, but I'm the vagina you're going in and you're trying to get into every night. Okay. You fucking me, but that's your best friend.

SPEAKER_02:

That's his best friend, though.

SPEAKER_04:

So go fuck your best friend.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

That's crazy work.

SPEAKER_02:

He would probably be like, That's the best idea you've had all in me.

SPEAKER_04:

I mean, they can go back to what the first story and it be open. But I guarantee but I guarantee you, he ain't gonna like Melissa asked once they go there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

I mean, they probably have, and he didn't, he figured that wasn't for him.

SPEAKER_04:

It probably in college. It probably most definitely happened in the college. In college.

SPEAKER_02:

And he was like, oh no, baby.

SPEAKER_04:

That ain't it. It most definitely happened.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

You got one more?

SPEAKER_02:

No, I don't.

SPEAKER_01:

You said you had five. Oh no, that was that was it.

SPEAKER_04:

Damn, played yourself.

SPEAKER_01:

Really?

SPEAKER_04:

Only four, huh?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Let's uh hop right into the uh comedy of the week. Now I'm not sure what post this comes from. I don't remember. I know it was when I posted recently, but it's not really about the post. Oh gosh. You know, uh the comic comes from the Freeman Lux. And this this this beautiful soul says they are so they love each other so look at her blushing. All that black love.

SPEAKER_02:

I I was wearing blush that day.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, you was. But see, when I hear all that black love, I'm thinking about all that ass.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, bye.

SPEAKER_04:

Thank you so much. All that ass. Ow. All that ass.

SPEAKER_02:

Ow.

SPEAKER_04:

In them jeans.

SPEAKER_02:

Ow, that hurts.

SPEAKER_04:

That's the comment of the week.

SPEAKER_02:

Thank you for the comment of the week. We appreciate that. I do love him. Do we?

SPEAKER_04:

I would hope so. Really? Yeah, I I would.

SPEAKER_02:

One could only hope. Oh. One could only hope. I'm teasing you. I'm sorry. I'm so sick.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm about to be sick of you. I'm about to be sick of you. Prepared to be sick of me. E yucky yucky.

SPEAKER_02:

Did you see? Did you see her wearing the shirt? She has she has the shirt and it says. Do you have a shirt now? Yeah, and it says e yuck.

SPEAKER_04:

I'm gonna probably buy one.

SPEAKER_02:

I need one of them. I I watched the video. I watched the original video. And I guess she was doing like a it was a barbecue restaurant uh thing, and she was like eating, and I I don't remember if it was the beans or if it was the macaroni and cheese that she had tasted. But she had tasted the barbecue and she was like, okay, okay. Then she tasted something else, and I think I want to say it was the macaroni and cheese. I'm pretty sure it was the macaroni and cheese. And she put the macaroni and cheese in her mouth and she was like doing this, and then she said, euck. I was like, Oh shoot.

SPEAKER_04:

It's funny.

SPEAKER_00:

She was like, mm-mm.

SPEAKER_04:

Hey, sometimes that just ain't it.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, she was like, mm-mm.

SPEAKER_04:

Sometimes that just ain't it.

SPEAKER_00:

But she said, eyuck.

SPEAKER_02:

That was comedy. That was comedy. I need to go take some more medicine, guys.

SPEAKER_04:

She's going down Booskies. I'm going down Boosky has been another episode.

SPEAKER_02:

If you are not doing so already, do not forget that you can follow us on all of our social media platforms.

SPEAKER_04:

And also forget to like, share, like, share, uh, uh-oh.

SPEAKER_02:

Not like, share, subscribe, comment, comment, and press that notification bell on YouTube so you can be notified when a new episode uploads, which is every Wednesday.

SPEAKER_04:

Um, if you would like for us to do a live episode, comment down below. Let us know if you're in.

SPEAKER_00:

And just comment live.

SPEAKER_04:

Just comment live. If we get enough, if we get enough, we may or may not. We don't commit to anything but each other.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, goodbye. Yeah, so follow us on uh YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, Life After I Do podcast. Don't forget, you can always write into the podcast at lifeafter podcast at gmail.com. We love and enjoy reading all of your stories for our reactions. Um, if you guys have any questions, you can also write into the podcast at life podcast at gmail.com. But you get a new episode every Wednesday, guys.

SPEAKER_01:

So until then, peace muskies, peace muskies.

Head Shot

Kynesha Gill

Host
Head Shot

Morice Gill

Host