Life After I Do Podcast

Our 2 Cents Vol.22

• Life After I Do • Season 1 • Episode 105

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Marriage is hard enough—but what happens when in-laws, exes, and unspoken expectations start to pile on? In this installment of Our 2 Cents, we’re breaking down relationship dilemmas that push boundaries to the limit.

From wild in-law visit requests to uncomfortable co-parenting situations and permanent reminders of old relationships (yes, the ex-wife tattoo situation is real), we’re talking through the real-life messes that test communication, loyalty, and respect.

With personal stories, raw reactions, and some laughs along the way, this episode brings real insight into how couples can navigate life’s most awkward moments.

Thanks for rocking with us! Don’t forget to follow Life After I Do so you never miss an episode. Got a relationship situation you want us to weigh in on? Hit us at https://linktr.ee/lifeafteridopodcast — we just might talk about it in a future episode.

SPEAKER_03:

He was furious.

SPEAKER_01:

Crazy.

SPEAKER_03:

He said, You think we're finna be in this in this place? No, babe. We're leaving with the kitten. We're going to the Airbnb. My parents are going to stay here in our bed. And then we're going to come back every morning to cook them breakfast. Yeah. Clean up after them. Cook their dinner. And then we're going to go back to the Airbnb. I think at this point you're just trying to test your lung capacity.

SPEAKER_02:

I do it for the people. They come for the doo-doo-doo-doo-doo.

SPEAKER_03:

Welcome back to another episode of the Life After I Do podcast, guys. Thank you for joining us today. Whether you're driving in your car, just waking up, if you're around the house cleaning.

SPEAKER_02:

If you brush your teeth or not yet, we appreciate you for tuning in.

SPEAKER_03:

With another episode of the Life After I Do podcast.

SPEAKER_02:

Delay podcast.

SPEAKER_03:

Of the laid podcast with Mo Kai.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm Messy Mo. Oh, yeah. I come for the mess. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, drama.

SPEAKER_02:

I I come here to spend time with you.

SPEAKER_01:

Do you?

SPEAKER_02:

I do. Oh. Because on my normal schedule throughout the week, I see all of two hours and ten minutes of you a day. Because when I come home from work and I and that eye mask is down.

SPEAKER_03:

It's done deal.

SPEAKER_02:

She's not talking about talking.

SPEAKER_03:

Done deal. And you already know this. And like three nights in a row, you thought you were finna come into that bedroom and have sexy time. And I said, you didn't get here before the face mask. That's crazy. That's wild.

SPEAKER_01:

It's crazy that I had to work.

SPEAKER_03:

It's it's crazy. It's crazy. Crazy the other time you didn't. You were in your room playing a mission. And what did you say? This game is too good.

SPEAKER_02:

I had to play my mission.

SPEAKER_03:

And I said, okay, well, I can't stay up no longer because my eyelids.

SPEAKER_02:

You could have said that.

SPEAKER_03:

My eyelids were head.

SPEAKER_02:

You said that the next morning, not that night.

SPEAKER_03:

No, I did. It was like my eyelids were like. Hey Booskies. Hey Booskies. Hi.

SPEAKER_02:

How's your week? How's you been? Tell the people about your week. Let me. I got time to get something to drink.

SPEAKER_03:

Y'all be back. Let me start it off like you do. Okay. It was an uneventful week. You know, it's same old, same old, nothing too exciting. Baby girl had her mock meet this past weekend or this past week. Yes. So, you know, there was there was that. She's got a little work to work on. You know, I'm here's the thing. One thing I have learned about my child is that she does not shy away from a little bit of spotlight. So when when she knows that there is like when it's time to turn it on, she turns it on.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna offer her. And that's I'm going to offer her$100 for every nine.

SPEAKER_03:

You shouldn't bribe children. For every nine children this year, I don't think that's great.

SPEAKER_02:

She can get a hundred. That means think about it.

SPEAKER_03:

She has the potential to earn$400 a meat.

SPEAKER_02:

A meat.$400 for every nine.$100. And if she gets a 10, she's going to Disneyland.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. Anywho.

SPEAKER_02:

I gotta motivate this baby somehow.

SPEAKER_03:

Um you should continue to motivate her that her hard work can pay off.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

So, and it's not just with the money. Goodbye. Anywho, um, I think she was, I'm not saying like she didn't try, because obviously I know she tried. But I just feel like because she also knows that it wasn't like a real, like a real meet. So she was like, you know, like I'm gonna show you what I got, but I'm not gonna show you what I got.

SPEAKER_02:

You show up, you practice how you show up.

SPEAKER_03:

And that's what I told her. But anyway, you know, it was fun. It was cute. It was cute, it was fun. She did, she actually did really good. I'm very proud of her. That was good to you.

SPEAKER_02:

I guess we just got different standards.

SPEAKER_03:

Demel, what you're not gonna do with it, perfect. What you're not gonna do is shit on my kids.

SPEAKER_02:

I was about to hit it with the Denzel speech from River Titan.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, goodbye.

SPEAKER_02:

We will be perfect in every aspect of the game. You miss a cue, you run a mile.

SPEAKER_03:

No, it's fine.

SPEAKER_02:

Your legs are bendy on that vault, you run a mile.

SPEAKER_03:

No, because I've I've seen her.

SPEAKER_02:

If you fall off that bar, I break my foot off in your John Brown hind parts, and then you run a mile.

SPEAKER_03:

Bye. No, I've I've seen her, so I know I know I know what she can do. Now it'd be a difference if I didn't know her, like the level in which I see I have seen her perform. So I've seen her perform at her like high level. So that's why I was not trying to be that parent when I got the scorecard back. You know, I was trying not to be that parent, but then I also had to let her know, you know, that wasn't what that that wasn't what we come here for. And I just, you know, that wasn't what we come here for. Um I paid that judge an additional$50, and um, I'm I'm kind of wanting it back.

SPEAKER_02:

You know, I I I hit her with the Jalen Hurts.

SPEAKER_03:

I said, um and it was a mock meet, so I know that kind of sounded bad. We didn't pay a judge. Like we did pay a judge, but the judge comes in. You pay the judge to be there to judge her. Yeah, to judge her so that she could um point out the weaknesses and what she needs to work on before we go to competition.

SPEAKER_02:

You're supposed to be trained to go.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

Rain, sleep, or snow? You supposed to be trained to go.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, so anyway, that happened. And um, yeah, that's pretty much it. I didn't have yeah, I didn't have anything.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh wow. Eventful for eventful, huh? Just nothing. What about the gym?

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, um deadlifts. I did 325 for five and dead. Okay. That was pretty good.

SPEAKER_02:

And still brought in no boxes from samples.

SPEAKER_03:

And still didn't bring down any laundry, didn't carry any groceries, and don't plan on. She barely carried a one. What have I complained about this week already that I feel like I've been doing too much of? Putting gas in. Putting gas in my car. So we're we're almost to we're almost to that to that limit where I'ma just have to leave it on E, and you ain't gonna have no choice but to just go put the gas in there yourself.

SPEAKER_02:

It's because you've been driving more. So I used to put gas in your car on on um like Thursdays. Yeah, but I can't do that no more. Yeah, it needs to it needs to be I I had to start doing it on Wednesdays.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah. I mean, you know, I mean, I've been I've been doing it. But you know, and every every week I'm out there risking my life at the pump and risking getting kidnapped or risking somebody running a scam on me, or you know, like I'm just the girl. Just a girl. I'm just out there. I'm just the girl. Okay, Gwen. What to tell you? I'm just okay, Gwen. But yeah. And I think the groceries are still very heavy. Still very heavy. Laundry baskets are still very heavy.

SPEAKER_02:

Crazy.

SPEAKER_03:

It's not okay, listen, it's not in the shape of uh a barbell, so it's different.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay?

SPEAKER_02:

Just hip thrust it into the house.

SPEAKER_03:

So dumb. Just hip thrusted into the house. No.

SPEAKER_02:

Just hip thrust into the house.

SPEAKER_03:

That's not a thing either. How was your week, baby?

SPEAKER_02:

Um my week was a week.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

That's all I'm gonna say.

SPEAKER_03:

Can I go ahead? Because you got this.

SPEAKER_02:

I know, you're jealous of it.

SPEAKER_03:

And this, he's got this one eyebrow that's longer.

SPEAKER_02:

Ten times longer than don't ahead of my eyebrows because it's luxurious. Okay. Luxurious? Okay. My week was a week. I got it done. What can I say?

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

I I I said, look here.

SPEAKER_03:

You said look here a week.

SPEAKER_02:

I gotta lock in. I had enough of you. I gotta lock in. Life is life and these terror is about to hit.

SPEAKER_03:

Wait a minute. Why did I go to old Navy today? And um Oh, you did? Yeah, I did. I went to Old Navy today, and uh, because all the active wear is on sale. And then the clearance. So all the like the old active wear that I bought all last season, all that went to clearance, and then the new stuff is on clearance. Not my not my clearance price, like not my my good sweater price, but still.

SPEAKER_02:

I thought I thought you were done.

SPEAKER_03:

Um, anywho, well, you were just we were just talking. Um, but there's a lady, she was looking at the pants and she was like, I swear I bought these for like four dollars the year before last. And she was like, and it's crazy because these pants are$42 already, these tariffs. And I was like, I don't think that's how that works. I was like, I was like, oh girl. I was like, it's crazy out here, right? I was like, I don't think, I don't think that's how that works, but okay. So that was your week.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, you know, and this it's it's about to be October. Well, I mean, it'd be October when y'all hear this.

SPEAKER_03:

The best part about this is again, I I went to uh Hobby Lobby today because October is coming.

SPEAKER_02:

It's out there, huh?

SPEAKER_03:

Because October is coming. So October is when Christmas stuff starts to come out. So, you know, Hobby Lobby, you know, they're on it. They are on it with the Christmas decor. And so I went looking at rugs and stuff today because I think I want to switch out the rugs for the front porch this season. They had a lot of good options. And then um, I want to go back to at home because I think I want to get, I can't decide if I want to get new Christmas pillows or if I just want to make Christmas pillows. What do you think? Really? You're gonna space out while I'm talking? Wow. Wow, just rude. I'm not spacing out. I'm asking a question. You think I should just make some pillows? I could make some pillows because because fabric was also 50% off.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna give you the answer that every husband gives his wife. There's nothing wrong with the ones we have.

SPEAKER_03:

There's nothing wrong with the ones we have now. So we don't need that. We've had them for like four years. It's time to like freshen up, switch some stuff out. Like, I want to switch up the decor for Christmas.

SPEAKER_02:

Wow, I'm happy you don't feel that way about your marriage because I'd be swapped out already.

SPEAKER_03:

You really should be happy. I don't feel that way about my marriage. Because you're not a pillow. That's why. You call me a teddy bear. Okay. Bye to me. I thought I was just stuffy. Anywho, now that now that I've said it out loud, I know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna I'm gonna make some pillows. I'm gonna make some pillows because the Christmas fabric is 50% off.

SPEAKER_02:

So it's not. No, it's not. No, it is. No, it's gonna be 50% off the day after Christmas.

SPEAKER_03:

No, it was 50% off today, but I couldn't decide what I wanted to make with it. So I left it there, but it's gonna be that way for the rest of the weekend.

SPEAKER_02:

This is my weekend.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, damn, that would mean today would be the last day. Oh because they're not open on Sunday.

SPEAKER_02:

Play yourself.

SPEAKER_03:

Damn. Hopefully it's still there. Even if it's not 50%, it'll still be 30 on Monday. So, I mean, that's fine. I only need like two yards. What? Why are you looking at me like that? I think I can get it done in like two weeks. I'll get some.

SPEAKER_02:

What we got today?

SPEAKER_03:

Um, it's everyone's favorite. Our two cents.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't say anything. It's your it's your favorite.

SPEAKER_03:

Wow, why would you say that?

SPEAKER_02:

Because I don't want something right now.

SPEAKER_03:

I could go for some gra. But you know what? Instead, no, I'm gonna make I'm making spring rolls. I'm gonna make homemade spring rolls.

SPEAKER_02:

If you're eating them like gra pa?

SPEAKER_03:

No, no, we eat egg rolls from grapa. I'm making spring rolls.

SPEAKER_02:

Not the same.

SPEAKER_03:

My gosh. Okay, you just keep that same energy when your daughter and I are sitting here having a whole spread. Okay. The kid asked for a pho for dinner tonight. And I don't know why, but last week I had got the grand idea to want to make pho from scratch. And so I was like looking up recipes and everything. And long story short, it takes about two days to really make like pho from scratch. And I was like, well, I don't have that type of energy right now. And so I figured out like a quick two-hour type deal with pho. So that's what we're gonna do.

SPEAKER_02:

Two hours.

SPEAKER_03:

Two hours compared to two days, it's it's it'll work.

SPEAKER_02:

I still feel like you should be making red beans and writing to the pho.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, well, you put it you've made your request and I've made your request. This is the request she's made. So when I'm done with her request, then you can request it, you can put in another request. If you want to put in a request after pho is done, you put your request in, put it on the family uh list right there, and I will let you know what day it shall be prepared for you.

SPEAKER_02:

I feel like my request should be at the top, no matter what.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. Well, what what's your request?

SPEAKER_02:

I want red beans and rice.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, again, okay.

SPEAKER_02:

I want some chili beans.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

I want some salmon croquettes.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. For breakfast or for dinner?

SPEAKER_02:

All day. We're homemade biscuits. Okay. Uh, I think some apple turnovers.

SPEAKER_03:

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02:

And um I really none of which you can eat. And I want a peach cobbler too.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. I could, I could make you, I could uh make you uh a lighter version of peach cobbler that could probably fit into your macros.

SPEAKER_02:

No, I don't.

SPEAKER_03:

But everything else.

SPEAKER_02:

I can't wait. I'm cutting. Oh, when this cut is over, I'm fucking with me. I'm making me, I'm I'm making a soul food dinner. Do you think I'm playing?

SPEAKER_03:

I don't think you're playing. I'll I'll probably make it for you.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I'm I'm ribs, greens, uh yams, mac and cheese.

SPEAKER_03:

All that.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't need the mac and cheese.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, I need them. I need the mac and cheese, but whatever. Um, so yeah, so we are gonna hop right into it because, like I said, guys, I have I have fun to bake. Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh wow. Let's hurry. Let's let's hurry up, people. Let's not waste her time.

SPEAKER_03:

That's not what I meant. You're such a buckle.

SPEAKER_02:

Let's go. You're such a buckle. I'll keep my responses short.

SPEAKER_03:

You don't have to keep your responses short. I'm just saying. Oh, okay. Like, you know, the kid is gonna get hungry. Yep. Um, let's see. Am I the asshole for refusing to have my sister-in-law service dog at my wedding?

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_03:

I once put um, oh, sorry, no. I'm getting married in five months with my fiance, and we set our we sent our invitations out last week. For context, my sister-in-law, my husband's brother's wife, um, has a medical dog since she's had brain cancer around five years ago. She has seizures where she feels dizzy 20 seconds beforehand and then goes unconscious for a few minutes. This happens three to four times a week. She has a dog who senses the seizures one to two minutes beforehand, and it gives her time to lay down in a safe space and warn people that a seizure is coming. The dog, which is a Labrador, is an angel, but sister-in-law, not so much. She is not a good person. She claims wrong facts about my fiance and I's respective fields, medical and biology environment, and screams at us when we politely call her out. We don't like her, but we are civil because she loves him. She loves her brother. My own sister, on the other hand, is my favorite person on earth. She is my maid of honor. She's a very angelic person towards dogs. If she's in the same room, her eyes get red and very, oh, sorry. She's very allergic, not angelic. She's very allergic to dogs. If she's in the same room as a dog, her eyes get very red and itchy, and she sneezes constantly, and she has a little asthma attack. Um, antihistamines don't work on her. She isn't an entitled person, preferred to sacrifice herself to penalize the person with the service dog. But in the same closed room with the dog for five hours, she will obviously have a strong asthma attack. Me and my fiance want my maid of honor to be comfortable in our wedding. And it's shallow, but I want her to feel pretty in the pictures and not to have swollen red eyes. And we want our sister-in-law to be safe. But we thought that with her husband always around her, she would have someone to lean on. We even proposed bringing a plus one to be there for her at all instances. And the venue is a 50-person room, so it's not possible to have them spread out enough and no backyard wedding in the winter. So I guess like room for the for the dog. We wanted to announce these propositions face to face, but my sister-in-law canceled our lunch together last minute and the invites needed to be sent out. So we wrote to her on Messenger all of our points and our propositions. And we thought it was a good idea because it gave her time to think about it and to not feel pressured to answer all of our invites at the immediate moment. She called me and screamed that I was an ableist and that I was an asshole for suggesting to remove her from her medical help and that I want to, and that I want her to create a scene at our wedding and get a concussion from falling. Brother-in-law just said what she says goes. So he's basically siding with his wife. Like whatever she says goes. Um, and we don't know what he thinks. My mother-in-law is furious and starts to say that she won't come to the wedding if the sister-in-law can't bring her dog. I know I'm biased because I'm obviously preferring my sister, and because I myself also have allergies, like food allergies, and believes allergies should be accommodated in my wedding. But um, what should I do? Am I the asshole? Is it an asshole move for me to suggest for her not to bring her dog?

SPEAKER_02:

No, it's not. It's not. Here's why I say that.

unknown:

Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

It's your day. That is true. It's your day. And if you if you want your sister to not have a swollen face in your pictures, because she's your maid of honor, it's your day. And uh your sister-in-law will let her, her husband, and your mother-in-law have a good time watching it via a live stream. That's all I'm gonna say.

SPEAKER_03:

I mean, I don't necessarily disagree with you.

SPEAKER_02:

Hold on, and let's just be honest. Oh gosh. She said that she's not a nice person to start with, so she knew that she wasn't gonna acquest it.

SPEAKER_03:

She knew that she wasn't gonna take it easy.

SPEAKER_02:

She wasn't gonna acquiesce to any of her suggestions, even though she's trying to make it work for everybody.

SPEAKER_03:

Right.

SPEAKER_02:

So again, it's not about her, it's about you. And I I guarantee you that mother-in law talking shit, she'd be there.

SPEAKER_03:

And and I do, I can appreciate that she was basically saying, like, excuse me, we'll even allow you to have an extra person there if you need to. But she's thinking if your husband is gonna be there anyway, right, and you're gonna be around like everybody, you're gonna be in a safe space.

SPEAKER_02:

I think the extra person was because the husband is probably part of the wedding party.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, okay. Because it's I mean, but in any case, like she's saying, like we're gonna have we're gonna make sure you're safe. Even if your dog is not there, you're still gonna be with family, you're still gonna be with enough people so that we can ensure your safety because obviously you have a condition that you can't control, right? And it says that she gets like she gets the warnings, like what is it, 20 minutes or 20 seconds?

SPEAKER_02:

How bad is this brain cancer?

SPEAKER_03:

Bye, Marie. Stop it. Stop it. It doesn't matter. It does not matter. Because if she's having seizures, yeah, she has seizures, but that's why she has the service dog because the service dog senses when the seizures are about to happen. Yeah, how bad is it? Okay, I'm not doing this with you this evening. Nope. I'm not doing it. No, I'm not falling for it. Nope. Ready? All right, yeah, well, sure. Am I the asshole for refusing to change my wedding guest list after my parents demanded it?

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_03:

I'm a 25-year-old female and my partner who's 31 and I are getting married in the fall of 2026 after almost four wonderful years together. Doubtful. My relation, my relationship with my parents have always been on the rockier side, and my fiance has little to do with my parents because of comments that were made to me in the past about threatening to make me homeless, etc. All this before we bought our first home together. After I moved out, my relationship with my parents had improved, and I was looking forward to having a small, intimate wedding with my parents, his parents, and some of our closest friends. We've planned a 25 to 30 person um guest list for a church ceremony, followed by a meal. On my side, the guest list includes my parents, my brother, my grandmother, and two of my dad's childhood friends who are like uncles to me. My bridal party consists of three women I'm close to, and I was considering asking a close male friend to be a bridesman. The issue began when I asked one of my close friends, someone I met at work in the early 2000s, um, and have stayed very close with ever since, to be a bridesmaid. She's been a consistent support in my life and has been involved in my journey with my fiance from the very, very early start. She's the reason we met. My mom objected, claiming that I didn't know her quote unquote deeply enough, despite the fact that she has been a major part of my life for many years. From there, things escalated. My parents demanded I invite a list of people that I don't even speak to and haven't had meaningful contact with in years, just so they would have more people on their side present on the day of my wedding. These people who are these people have added nothing to our wedding day, and I do not envision them being present when I think of my dream wedding day. So naturally I refused, and their behavior became extreme. Calling me pathetic, threatening to invite people, threatening to invite these people behind my back just to make sure that I get upset on my wedding day, publicly posting online that my fiance and I are awful and that they would not attend. And my dad even called the wedding a sham. Oh, okay. Am I under the belief that the guest list should mine and my fiance alone and that we get to have the final say in who we want to invite to our wedding, especially a wedding of this size? I don't think that I'm being unreasonable, but my parents are making me feel like it's a battleground. Also, for added context, we have paid for this wedding entirely out of our own pockets, which is fine, and I didn't mind doing, but I know some people will have a view if my parents were paying.

unknown:

Fuck them.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't give a fuck. You were already rocking with them. And they look, you don't need them. They threatened to make you homeless. You found you found a young man and you guys are making a life together. Yeah. And this friend, it sounds like this friend has been more supportive of your relationship than your parents. Than your own parents. Yeah. Fuck them.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, I have to agree.

SPEAKER_02:

And first of all, look here. They lost my support when they went online bad mouthing you because you don't actually have to date demands. That's crazy. Crazy work. That's crazy work. I don't I don't know that's crazy work. I don't know what it is when people you you you think you're finna guilt me or talk and or or make me look bad that make you. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

And wait, and the button. I'm gonna double down.

SPEAKER_02:

Hold on, baby. Personally, you do I'm when you do some shit like that to me, I'm doubling down. Of course.

SPEAKER_03:

Of course. And I think that's what she's doing.

SPEAKER_02:

Because my but I'm gonna be petty with mine, because I'm about to make I'm gonna make videos responding to you.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh wow. And then post them.

SPEAKER_02:

And then post them. That's it. And I'm and I'm going below the belt.

SPEAKER_03:

You going to hell. They go low.

SPEAKER_02:

Go to hell.

SPEAKER_03:

We go to where well Cardi say we go to where the lava at. Okay. She said, I understand you being nice, Michelle. That's nice, but that's not what we do. That's not what we're doing. That's crazy work. That's not what we do here. Yeah, I I I would have to agree. Like you're paying for the wedding. It's your wedding day. It already sounded like you guys had a rocky relationship to begin with. It seems like, you know, I I would probably have to tell them, look, you you know, y'all ain't gotta be there.

SPEAKER_02:

I would no longer want to.

SPEAKER_03:

You're gonna be uninvited. Actually, actually, now that I think about it, there's gonna be even less people on my side, which I'm perfectly fine with. Because now I don't want you there. Because now I don't even want you there. Because we just got back on speaking terms. Because like she said, they didn't have a really good relationship until you know she moved out, her fiance were together, their relationship was starting to even out a little bit. And now it seems like mom and pop is back to their old bullshit.

SPEAKER_02:

It's just like and there it goes. I don't know what it is about that generation of parents who they feel like no matter what they did or matter what your upbringing was.

SPEAKER_03:

What your age is.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. That they that they just supposed to be uh that they have final say. They have they have final say, and they're supposed to be looked at as some high regard no matter how they treated you or how you're man, you better sit your ass down. Yeah, look at that.

SPEAKER_03:

Like you got you got final say, but you literally tried to kick me out.

SPEAKER_02:

It's crazy work. If you hear this, you DM me, I'll slap your daddy for you. Bye Maurice, you will not.

SPEAKER_03:

Um, okay, here we go. Am I the asshole for not picking up my ex's daughter from school when I picked up our son?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes.

SPEAKER_03:

You sure about that?

SPEAKER_02:

I don't know, Gigo.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. Um X cheated on me when I was pregnant with our son, who's now eight. And because of this, he now has a daughter who's also eight with his affair partner, who's now his wife. We are not on good terms, and I do not have a relationship with my ex's daughter. I have never spoken a word to her or spent any significant time in her presence. Ex and I split custody 50-50 with our son. Two weeks ago, I got a call from the school during custody time, uh, her ex's custody time. So he should have been picking the son up from school. So two weeks ago, I got a call from the school during his custody time stating nobody had picked our son up from school and was asking if I would come and get him. When I got to the school, my ex's daughter was also there and the teacher was with her. She told me I was on the approved list to pick up my ex's daughter and that I would need to take the both them both. I said, no. And I told her that I did not want to be on that list, as I would never pick this child up from school. She told me that she would pass along the word and that it would be uh taken care of, but I would have to call and follow up to make sure that it was taken care of. My ex never told me or his wife, um, or his wife never told me to that I was an authorized pickup person for the daughter. When he realized that I didn't pick up his daughter with our son, he was furious. He asked me how I could leave her behind when I have our son unplanned anyway. I told him via our parenting app that I picked up our son as I would always do if needed, but his daughter is not my child, and I will not be their emergency pickup contact. According to my ex's daughter, she was there until seven because I refused to pick her up with our son. She is a child and I understand that it's not ideal. I don't feel bad per se, but I wonder if I would be considered an asshole for being unwilling to do this just this once. This is not something I want to be a regular that I want to be a regular thing, and it's the first time it ever happened. My ex's wife was apparently delayed from getting out of town, and my ex was working. But am I the asshole?

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna say yes or no. I'm gonna say no because it's not your child. It's not your responsibility, but at the same time, that's his sister.

SPEAKER_03:

That's his sister, but yeah, I know, but and not only that, you also put my name on paperwork that I didn't authorize.

SPEAKER_02:

I understand that. So I understand that.

SPEAKER_03:

But again How bold of you to do such a thing?

SPEAKER_02:

As a parent, sure. Every year we get that form, who's authorized to pick your kid up? Do we always uh verify with these? I do. Ah, we know we don't. I do.

SPEAKER_03:

Well first of all, I had to because I had to switch because the verified person was my best friend and they no longer live in the same state.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, first of all. First of all.

SPEAKER_03:

But yes, they know that they're authorized to pick our child up.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, there's only two people authorized to pick up.

SPEAKER_03:

But they they are very much aware that they're authorized to pick up our child. As a one-time thing, I don't think I like you mean she could have just done it, and then when she did it and said this can't happen again.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but it probably wasn't. But I understand why she didn't.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah. She said they're not even on good speaking terms.

SPEAKER_02:

Because you gotta set you gotta set precedent.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

I get that.

SPEAKER_03:

She said, I picked up my child.

SPEAKER_02:

But I do feel like some of that is pettiness towards him. So absolutely. Because he cheated.

SPEAKER_03:

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02:

So a sense of the father. That that that baby girl ain't had nothing to do with her decision her daddy made.

SPEAKER_03:

Listen, none of not listen, unfortunately, see, all of us are paying in some shape or form from what our parents have done.

SPEAKER_02:

Go ahead.

SPEAKER_03:

Unfortunately. But no, I do get what you're saying. She's a child. She doesn't know what's going on. She's a kid. Yeah, she's eight, and now she had to be at school till 7 40. So you wouldn't feed her either? She was that baby was hungry. I mean, if I had some extra snacks in my car, look here. I'm just teasing. Look here.

SPEAKER_02:

I let me put it this way. I am, there is no part of me that is responsible for your niece. Right. I'm not gonna just leave her somewhere when I know I could take her. Right. And I'm gonna feeder too.

SPEAKER_01:

Are you gonna feed her?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. Just the way I fed and took care of uh my sweet Kaya when she blew that damn diaper out her first time meeting me.

SPEAKER_03:

That was hilarious.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm not gonna just like come on now. I didn't have to. I could let you I could let her sit right there and have blown out diaper until her mama got back.

SPEAKER_03:

I see what, I see what you're mean. I see what you're saying. Yes, it's a kid because the kid has nothing to do with it. Right. She has nothing to do with it. Because then what happens? What happens if like literally nobody could come get her?

SPEAKER_00:

See, because

SPEAKER_03:

Eventually you but eventually you would have broke down and been like, you know what, I'm gonna just go get her. But then you're gonna hear it. You're like, she would make sure her ex heard it. This could never happen again. Like you and your wife, get it together.

SPEAKER_02:

I get it. You and that skeezer, you know.

SPEAKER_03:

Right. Because the kids are the same age, they both ate. So they was pregnant at the same time. Crazy work. And then he marries her. Crazy work. Maybe she wasn't. That's because she didn't probably want them or something. Okay. Ready? Am I the asshole for suggesting my in-laws stay at an Airbnb instead of us leaving our home with our kitten? Okay. My parent-in-laws are visiting us for a week because our space is so small, they would have to sleep on the couch, which they would not like. So I suggested booking them an Airbnb. The way they could spend the that way they could spend the day with us, enjoy homemade meals. Um, maybe my husband, she was like, oh, her husband can cook and stuff, enjoy homemade meals, then go out and return for dinner at our place before spending the night at their Airbnb comfortably. My husband hated the idea and was furious that I even suggested it. He wants us to leave our apartment for them and for us to stay at the Airbnb ourselves, taking our three-month-old kitten with us, then come back every single morning to prepare their meals, do the house tours for them, and then spend the day with them. Am I crazy for thinking that this sounds unreasonable? No, no, no. The fuck?

SPEAKER_02:

What type of parents would want to displace you that like that anyway? That's wild.

SPEAKER_03:

She said they wouldn't like sleeping.

SPEAKER_02:

They must be from the Caucas Mountains.

SPEAKER_03:

They would not like it. Here's the thing I can I can understand when you have like family or like parents who come from um maybe like a different country or something, they don't come very often and they're gonna be staying the week. Of course, you want them to be as comfortable as possible. Like, I don't wouldn't want you to travel all this way for you to be uncomfortable in my house for a whole week. But um I just don't know that I mean that I feel like that kind of falls in with like getting away from the city.

SPEAKER_02:

When they booked the trip, they knew you had a one bedroom. So when they booked the flight, they should have booked the Airbnb. They should have booked the Airbnb over the room.

SPEAKER_03:

No, they left that, they left that for you to come up with.

SPEAKER_02:

Again, I say, when you book the flight.

SPEAKER_03:

But see, that also means, okay, if we're leaving, because if the only other bed that's up, if the only bed that's available is ours, because otherwise they would be sleeping on the couch, that means you want, I can't have them sleeping in my bed. I can't have nobody else sleeping in my bed. That's where I draw the line. I'm gonna tell you right now.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna tell you right now, I draw the line of people sleeping in my bed. The only person, the only two people that I can't do that. The only two people that can sleep in my bed, that's not me and you, is in is in heaven. I can't, I can't do that. I can give my bed up for nobody else.

SPEAKER_03:

I can't do that. That's too much.

SPEAKER_02:

That's wild.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, that's wild. He's he said, he was furious. Crazy. He said, You think we finna be in this in this place? No, babe. We're leaving with the kitten. We're going to the Airbnb. My parents are gonna stay here in our bed, and then we're gonna come back every morning to cook them breakfast, clean up after them, cook their dinner, and then we're gonna go back to the Airbnb.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm out. Yeah, it's a lot. I didn't sign up for that.

SPEAKER_03:

That's a lot. All right. Am I the asshole for being furious that my cousin dragged her stupid kid on our Italy trip?

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, come on.

SPEAKER_03:

We planned a family trip to Italy, six adults. Should have been easy, should have been fun, but my cousin decided to bring her 10-year-old son. Big mistake. Honestly, I hate that she did this because that kid single-handedly ruined our Florence day. We checked out of our Airbnb at 10 a.m. Flight wasn't until evening. I did the smart thing, book bounced luggage storage near Santa Maria, so we didn't have to haul suitcases, drop bags, get the QR code, smooth as butter for about five minutes. I thought, great, this is gonna be a great chill day. Then the kid happened. First stop, Piazza. Signoria, street performer painted head to toe in silver, standing still like a statue. The demon child stares for a minute, then walks up to him and pinches his leg. Not a light pinch, a fool-on pinch, like he's testing the guy's paint job. The silver man jumps, kid screams, crowd laughs, performer yells in Italian, my cousin's falling over herself, apologizing. Meanwhile, I'm standing here thinking, Effing hate this. We finally drag him away, and I'm praying we can salvage the day. Nope. He runs straight to the Neptune fountain and climbs it like it's a juggle gym. A guard blows his whistle so loud that the entire piazza stops. My cousin's face is purple, the guard is pissed, the crowd is staring, and I'm just done. By the time we picked up our luggage that night, everyone was silent. No talking, no laughing, just six adults completely drained by one kid who managed to turn Florence into his personal war zone. On the train to the airport, I kept thinking I paid for storage so we could enjoy Florence light and Caffrey uh carefree. Instead, we got cardio, humiliation, and babysitting duties. I'll admit it, I muttered stupid kid more than once. I hate it the entire day. And honestly, I hate that my cousin thought it was a good idea to drag him along in the first place. Am I the asshole for being so angry? Or is it fair to say that her kid ruined Florence and I'm not obligated to pretend otherwise, stupid kid?

SPEAKER_02:

Both. He's 10.

SPEAKER_03:

He's 10, but I also think it's crazy that you're be the only person who brings a kid on a vacation where it's all adults.

SPEAKER_02:

Here's what I think will happen. She paid, she really wanted to go. She didn't want to give up, she didn't want to let the trip go, and she couldn't find a probably right.

SPEAKER_03:

There was nowhere for him to go.

SPEAKER_02:

So she brought the kid hoping for the best. Now, unfortunately, it didn't go as well as she hoped it would do, but he's 10 though.

SPEAKER_03:

You would think it would be the behavior would be a little better, but it's a 10-year-old boy. Okay, I'm done with you. So done with you.

SPEAKER_02:

You gotta watch the video, see what I did. Um she knew what kind of cat kind of kids she had.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, yeah. Parents know they're children.

SPEAKER_02:

So, like my kid, no, I would have just pushed her ass in that pond.

SPEAKER_03:

Bye.

SPEAKER_02:

You're not gonna embarrass me in front of all these people.

SPEAKER_03:

You're not gonna push her in a pond.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna embarrass you when you embarrass me. That's how we go. Um First of all, don't call a kid stupid. That's not nice.

SPEAKER_03:

I know that's that's so that's so playground. That's not nice.

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, I I'm gonna let the demon slide because after I saw what he, after y'all read, after I heard what he did, I understand that. You're not wrong for being mad at him because he did ruin your day.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, he did.

SPEAKER_02:

Right? He did. But I do believe that your cousin was trying to make the best out of a situation that she could. Yeah. I don't know what her dynamic is as far as this child's father, but maybe this is the only way she can make it work where she can go on the trip. And unfortunately for people with kids, that tends we turn down a lot of invitations.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, we do. But it's not, but I feel like also with us, it's not necessarily because we can't find shut up. Not necessarily that we can't find somewhere where she needs to be. But it's also because I I don't be like letting my kid be going like a lot of places to be like overnight with people. You know what I'm saying? You know, what? Why? Because that's your number one excuse all day. We ain't got nobody to watch, baby girl. So we can't go. Can't do it. Can't do it. Damn, play yourself. No, but I mean, but that is the truth sometimes. Like it very much is the truth. Like a lot of the time it is the truth. But we do have, you know, things in place where she can go. But I don't always like, I'm just not, I'm not one of those parents that's very free and willy-nilly when it comes to my kid being overnight anywhere without me. Like, that's just that's just where I am. Maybe as she gets older, it'll I'll relinquish a little bit more, but that's just not, it's not what I'm what I'm down with, you know? Um, okay, so last one. Let's get one more in. Okay. Um, am I the asshole for telling my fiance that I won't marry him unless he removes his ex-wife's name tattooed across his chest? Okay. I'm a 28-year-old female and I'm engaged to my fiance who is 32. He was married before, and while I understand people do have past, there's one thing that I can't get over. He still has his ex-wife's name tattooed in big letters across his chest. I assumed he'd get it removed eventually, but when I brought it up, he shrugged it off and said that it was just ink and that it doesn't mean anything anymore. To me, it absolutely does. The thought of walking down the aisle and starting a new life together while he literally has another woman's name written across his chest over his heart makes me feel disrespected and humiliated. I told him that I won't marry him unless he covers it up. He didn't like, he didn't like it and said, uh, mind my own body and told me to be uh that not to be shallow and to focus on the present, not the past. But every time I see him with no t-shirt on, I see the name of his ex-wife, and that hurts me. And he's refusing to even consider it. So am I the asshole for making this a condition before we get married?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, his body, his choice.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, I I knew that's where you were gonna take this.

SPEAKER_02:

Look here. In y'all's quest for equality, it gotta be across the board. His body, his choice. You know, maybe uh I don't I don't know how he uh Yeah no, I don't know how they separated, but maybe it wasn't maybe it was on good terms. They just did see I die. And she was the one he let go. But you you hear now.

SPEAKER_03:

You hear it now. You hear it now. Okay, so What's her name? I don't know. She didn't say what her name was? No, but she said it's in big letters across the hard to get removed and cover up. You could black it out.

SPEAKER_02:

Nah.

SPEAKER_03:

She just don't want to see it. So don't look. Because, like, and here's the thing I can I can understand it from both sides. I totally see his point, and I can also see her point because I'm also thinking like you getting out the shower, your shirt is off. So if I had you turn to me. If I have Maya written right here, and you turn towards me, and all I have to see is Maya all the time, all the time, or when I'm like on top and I'm looking down at you, and all I see is your ex-wife's name, that's probably gonna be a hard note for me.

SPEAKER_02:

She had a career. Bye, Maurice.

SPEAKER_03:

That but I can that's why I said I can understand, I can understand both. Like uh imagine if it was the other way around. Like, what if she had, I don't know, Brandon in big old English across her chest, and you standing at the altar. Are you really gonna want to have to stare at Brandon across your wife's chest for the rest of your life?

SPEAKER_02:

I just nickname my penis Brandon from that day forward.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, okay. I see, I see. I see what type of time you're on. I see what type of time you're on. His body is choice. And it you listen, he told her, mind your own body.

SPEAKER_02:

So why why why are you threatened by somebody that's not around?

SPEAKER_03:

I mean, but here's the thing, too. Uh this is what I would also say. Don't make threats that you're not gonna follow through with either. Because you also told him that you are refusing to marry him until he covers it up. So what if he tries to call your bluff and be like, I have no plans on covering this up? So I guess we're either gonna date indefinitely or I guess there's the door. It was nice. And maybe I'll still have a chance to reconnect with this one right here.

SPEAKER_02:

The one that has my heart.

SPEAKER_03:

Wow, really? Scandalous. Scandalous. If he said some crap like that, that's how your tires get slashed. Oh, wow, crazy, huh? It's crazy. Crazy that's crazy. Because tires get slashed, tires get slashed, like you know, I don't know, like slippery stuff at your front door when you walk out and bam.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm sorry, what?

SPEAKER_03:

Huh? What did you say? You said something? Wow. All right, what do we have for the comment of the week, baby?

SPEAKER_02:

The comment of the week uh is from the reaction about the the boyfriend that upgraded his seat and left.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, and it didn't update. Okay, so if you guys are we had there was a uh gosh, I just went all over the place. A gentleman went on a trip with his girlfriend, and when he got together, but they bought it.

SPEAKER_02:

They each bought their own ticket. For some reason that's important. I don't know why.

SPEAKER_03:

She paid for her ticket, but he ended up getting an offer to upgrade to first class on the same flight that they were going on together, because this is a trip together as boyfriend and girlfriend. Um, so he upgrades to first class and tells his girlfriend as she's walking back to coach, I'll see you when we get there.

SPEAKER_00:

Yep.

SPEAKER_03:

He does not offer to upgrade her. He doesn't offer to decline the upgrade that that was given to him. He was like, I'm sitting in first class now and I don't have to deal with that coach life, but I'll see you when we land. And so this is a response to that video.

SPEAKER_02:

Her comment was, he's not for her. He's for them seats.

SPEAKER_03:

And then she put the seat emoji, the airplane seat emoji, with three laughing, rolling on the floor emojis. He's not for her.

SPEAKER_02:

He's for I will say that when I read this, I started crying laughing. This was this really took me out.

SPEAKER_03:

That took you out?

SPEAKER_02:

It took me out. I can't. I had a full face of tears.

SPEAKER_03:

Really?

SPEAKER_02:

I y'all understand. I live for the comments.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh my gosh. And who did this come from? I'm not gonna but uh Shaima73.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't know. I you know, I don't butcher people's name. I can't say words. You know, it's funny. It was funny.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, that was really funny. All right, guys. This has been another episode of the Laid Podcast. If you are not doing so already, you already know the drill. If you've been here before, but if you have not, feel free to follow us on all of our social media platforms. You can follow us on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, YouTube.

SPEAKER_02:

OnlyPans.

SPEAKER_03:

OnlyPans. Um, and you can also write into the podcast at lifeafteridopodcast at gmail.com. We love hearing from you guys. We love interacting with you guys. Don't forget to uh like and share. We love seeing all the stitch with the videos. Just keep engaging. We really enjoy it and draw all the love. We appreciate you guys.

SPEAKER_02:

But until next time, tell a friend to tell a friend to telephone.

SPEAKER_03:

Right. And you get a new episode every Wednesday, so don't forget. Okay. Until next time. Peace, Booskies. Peace, Booskies.

People on this episode

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Kynesha Gill

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Morice Gill

Host