Life After I Do Podcast
Marriage and relationships can be tough. You may feel like you’re the only one struggling but you’re not. Life After I do is a weekly podcast where Morice and Kynesha, a black married millennial couple, share their experiences and advice on everything from kids and family to intimacy and connection. Noting is off limits.
In their 21 years together and 7 years of marriage, Morice and Kynesha have learned a lot about what it takes to make a relationship work. They know the importance of communication, trust and commitment. They also know it’s okay to not have it all figured out.
Join them every Wednesday as they talk about their own journey of “Life After I do”.
Life After I Do Podcast
Our 2 Cents Vol. 20
We made it to 100 episodes—and we’re going all in on this one. From family updates to jaw-dropping relationship dilemmas, this episode brings the same energy, humor, and honesty you’ve come to expect from Life After I Do.
We share the joys (and growing pains) of raising an 8-year-old, then dive into relationship stories that had us pausing mid-convo. Think: late-night secret calls, a surprising family twist on OnlyFans, and a 20-year-old bringing home a man twice her age.
The age-gap discussion? Let’s just say we didn’t hold back. Some things bring out the protective parent in us real quick.
We also take time to shout out some of the funniest listener comments that have kept us cracking up behind the scenes.
Thanks for riding with us. Here’s to the next 100!
Thanks for rocking with us! Don’t forget to follow Life After I Do so you never miss an episode. Got a relationship situation you want us to weigh in on? Hit us at https://linktr.ee/lifeafteridopodcast — we just might talk about it in a future episode.
it's molito and nisha g and we are on episode 100 so thank you to all you guys who have stuck by us through thick and thin. If you knew what it is or if you chewed it is, we appreciate we appreciate all the love and there's more, and there's more to come, and episode 100 will be everyone's favorite, that's good, it's an hour two cents episode and we're going to drop our hour two cents back to Back, going back to back like the Lakers in 09-2010. Okay, back to back.
Speaker 2:Thank you everyone for your continued support and let's see if we can get another hundred down.
Speaker 1:That's right, 100.
Speaker 2:100.
Speaker 1:100 it down 100. 100.
Speaker 2:100 bands hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Life After I. Do Podcast Sit back, relax and enjoy. To come kick it with us for the next 45 minutes to one hour with Moly Thuanisha.
Speaker 1:Jean Maurice and. Kynesha 45, 47. I can't, you know him and his antics. Do, do, do, do, do, do doha 45, 47. I can't, you know him and his antics. 45, 47. I'm back. I came here to check on Dwight, dwight, dwight, around your mouth, stop it, I can't. Hey, booskies, hey.
Speaker 2:Booskies, how are you feeling? I'm feeling good. How are you doing?
Speaker 1:I mean overall, overall, can't complain, but you know, let me stop you. Let me stop you now we're going, but overall we're doing good, vibes only okay, I mean I'm good.
Speaker 2:I feel like my vibes are we're doing good vibes usually flying high so how are you?
Speaker 1:how is your week? Let's get into it.
Speaker 2:Uh, my week was good celebrating baby girl's eighth birthday I have an eight-year-old. We're not talking about her oh, I am, because I have an eight-year-old and you can't live, I'm not sure like how, yeah, like because it's crazy, because I just gave birth last week.
Speaker 1:That's funny, because time says differently yeah, and she's eight already.
Speaker 2:So I'm not sure like if it's a phenomenon or something, or like how that works.
Speaker 1:Hello to kujay. What do you think? Bye, something's a phenomenon or something, or like how that works. Let's ask.
Speaker 2:LL Cool J. What do you think Bye? Something like a phenomenon. Yeah, so my baby is eight and Eight and great. She's eight and great and that personality.
Speaker 1:Great, not gray.
Speaker 2:I didn't say gray. And that personality is starting to shine through and her testing more boundaries. She definitely testing and trying to see like if she can outsmart her parents she's definitely and although it gives me a little bit of a giggle and a tickle.
Speaker 2:Uh, it's annoying as crap and I've been having to lay down a little bit of law with her. Give her a little bit of scared straight medicine um no, but she's good. But we celebrated her 8th birthday over the weekend and she was really, really happy and at her birthday she was like I want to say thank you to my parents and everybody was like, oh, my gosh, oh. And I was like that's my baby. And I was like you're welcome, not to her parents. You know what she told me today when I picked her up from school. What'd she say? I picked her up from school and you know, okay, so for her birthday she got lots of gift cards and she got like three Chick-fil-A gift cards, right, and she loves Chick-fil-A.
Speaker 2:So I pick her up from school and she goes, she goes, I'm hungry, mom. And I was like, okay, I was like I can get you food when we get home. And she was like but I'm thinking I want to like go get something to eat. And I was like, oh, you go get something to eat. And I was like, oh, you want to go get your like Chick-fil-A? And she was like no, I'm thinking I want to go sit down at a restaurant. And I said, girl, you have practice in like 40 minutes. Not going to happen.
Speaker 2:I was like but you can get your Chick-fil-A, you have money to pay for your own Chick-fil-A. And she was like OK, I think I want to get my Chick-fil-A. So I was just giving get Chick-fil-A now, before practice, or would you like to get it after practice? She was like no, I want to get it now because I want to be full when I go to practice. I said, okay, that's fine, we're driving and I always keep my rearview mirror a little tilted down so I can see her. She goes, mom. I was like, yeah, she was like you're such a great parent to me, aw.
Speaker 1:Did you?
Speaker 2:cry. I was like Did you cry? No, you cried. She was like you're such a great parent to me. You cried and she was like I'll love you forever.
Speaker 1:And I was like you get such sweet things? I get that you have to do whatever your wife says.
Speaker 2:You have to take care of your wife. What did she say last night, when I was like you were annoying me and she was telling you you had to give me my space and be respectful.
Speaker 1:Sometimes you have to get your wife for her own space.
Speaker 2:You need to be respectful. I said look here.
Speaker 1:She said respect your wife. I said look here, dad, she wants space. If this one thing that we're gonna do is gonna is ride for her mama, that's one thing she goes, she gonna ride for her mom.
Speaker 1:She stands up for you too, don't get it twisted she does well, my dad, he whatever, he made black he's mad black, he made by the mail. He's mad my week was cool, just exhausted I didn't ask you. I know I'm just gonna cut you out. It was. It was exhausting because baby girl getting ready for baby girl's party and her birthday trying to make sure she had everything she wanted.
Speaker 2:Everything she wanted.
Speaker 1:And I will say that the smile and the look on her face, priceless it was. I was like. That's why I think I told you I said you did good, mom, like you did good Like my baby was on Saturday y'all.
Speaker 2:My baby was happy. And what did she tell me? Because I didn't get the balloon arch right. And I remember I told her I was like I'm sorry, I didn't get your balloon Arch. I was like I kind of like ran out of time. Mommy was falling behind and she literally looks at me and she was like it's okay, mom, I just want the pool of my friends.
Speaker 1:And I was like well, I wish you would've told me that, because I would've took some of that food back.
Speaker 2:Bye, goodbye. I was talking to Tiffany, her cousin's mom, and she was like she said, venice always tells her Cherry, y'all do too much. She was like y'all be doing too much for my birthday, I just be wanting my friends a little bit of food.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:Y'all be doing too much.
Speaker 1:We just be trying to get these kids something great.
Speaker 2:We just, yeah, we do Like. I was like obsessed with her decor. I was like I just want to make sure, like her theme comes across, you know.
Speaker 1:This girl. She's now officially had three water birthdays. And I think every water birthday is her favorite birthday.
Speaker 2:But it's still well. She finally said, like outside of her fourth birthday. This is like this was it? Yeah, this was.
Speaker 1:Because she had the pool.
Speaker 2:This was the top tender, right here. You know but her fourth birthday is still a memorable one, so it was a long, a long weekend, stressful week yeah, personal life is life.
Speaker 1:But you know, my baby was happy, so we are. I don't know about my wife, but I am still recovering. I am still.
Speaker 2:I mean we're still recovering but like Exhausted. I still had to, I still had to like.
Speaker 1:Okay, keep moving, you know, yeah, I shut that shit down.
Speaker 2:He was struggling today at the gym.
Speaker 1:I said I'm here. I'm here, but don't expect it. He's like I'm tired. How are you not tired from the?
Speaker 2:weekend, but it doesn't change the fact that we still got stuff to do, like I mean, I was like I'm in here, don't expect much, I'll be happy. I showed up and we showed up late the hard part is that, oh gosh, my goodness, the kid closed her whole finger in the front door. Do you even know how she did it?
Speaker 1:she was in a rush to her and come back and talk to her granny because you know she felt like she gotta talk to everybody, but she legit.
Speaker 2:Oh, maybe when she closed it she was holding on to it because I couldn't like, because normally you just push the door closed the baby closed her whole finger, separated the skin from the, the fingernail blood going everywhere. I was like girlfriend, so we ended up being a little late to school today, but I picked her up from school I checked on her.
Speaker 1:I was like how.
Speaker 2:I was like how's your finger and she's like my finger. She was like it's good, she's like it's just sore when I pinch it, and I was like, okay, well then don't pinch it and she came home, she did a couple of flips and she was like mom I didn't even feel it because I was like damn, do you put that nerve endings in there this morning?
Speaker 1:she was like you're going to be fine.
Speaker 2:But I tell you, don't do her like that when she's having an experience. You can't do that to her.
Speaker 1:Look here, you won't give me a son, so I have to give her the best of both worlds, that's absolutely ridiculous.
Speaker 2:Don't do that, that's stupid.
Speaker 1:Don't do that. You're like Don't do that.
Speaker 2:That's stupid. Don't do that. You're like. I can't do it Like because she's being she's not being dramatic.
Speaker 1:Her finger feels like it's falling off sir, oh, my God, okay, come on, ma'am come on.
Speaker 2:Goodness gracious, what we got. Oh, we got.
Speaker 1:Well, anyway, Guys, in honor of episode 100, we are giving you a.
Speaker 2:An extra dose of our juices.
Speaker 1:It's like back in. It's like if all y'all out there are old enough to go to Rite Aid, it's like you're gonna double scoop. Remember, at Rite Aid you had to single the double and the triple, the thrifty ice cream, yeah, thrifty ice cream.
Speaker 2:Those were good times actually Busting.
Speaker 1:Those were really good times when you, you, ice cream on a hot summer day.
Speaker 2:And then don't mess around here and get a triple scoop, right.
Speaker 1:In a cup. I ain't feeling with that cone. I ain't feeling with that cone.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna yeah, I want all my ice cream.
Speaker 1:I want all my ice cream. You can put that in a cup Pim, Put the cone on top.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but nah, I'm gonna eat all my ice cream dibs, but there's going to be another. Aren't you serious In celebration of our 100th episode?
Speaker 1:Can you believe it's been 100 episodes? I cannot believe I have tolerated you for 100 times. I have not.
Speaker 2:Wow, you tolerated me for 100 times. That's crazy work.
Speaker 1:What happens, people, is that we record and then she makes me mad and then she puts it on me and I forget.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1:That's what happens all the time.
Speaker 2:That is not.
Speaker 1:That's exactly what happened.
Speaker 2:OK, well, we're going to go ahead and we're going to go ahead and get this started, because I have a kid to tend to. So there's that.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to make another.
Speaker 2:Let's, let's kind of hop right into it.
Speaker 1:OK, here we go.
Speaker 2:Am I the asshole for telling my wife she can't have it both ways? We've been married for nine years. We're in our thirties and have two kids. For the most part I think our relationship is great. We don't really struggle with jealousy or insecurity or like usually anything. Until recently.
Speaker 2:I know this makes me sound horrible, but I never really got along with one of her friend groups. These are some of her work friends she started hanging out with about a year ago. Nothing really against them, just don't really think it was my crowd. It's two married guys and two women who are divorced, one recently. So, and the few times I've come along with the wife to hang out with them, it was mostly work talk and I didn't find that particularly interesting. So usually I just stay home, care for the kids to save money on the sitter and let my wife go. But I was clear with my wife that I just didn't really enjoy that particular group and while I encourage her to go out and socialize, I just didn't want to come. She was fine at first but then the group started pressuring her into bringing me, as the guys started bringing their wives around and one of the gals found a partner so she was starting to feel awkward coming along without me. We argued for a bit but after a few times she said it was important to her that I come along, so I agreed. She said it was important to her that I come along, so I agreed. Well, to my surprise, it turned out I get along really well with one of the guy's wives. We just hit it off immediately because we're a very similar type of geek. So we just talk about TV or movies or anime while the others did their thing.
Speaker 2:I thought I cracked the code because now, whenever spouses were invited to the hangouts, I could show up and have a good time and I thought it'd make my wife happy. It did not. Instead of her being happy that I'm coming, she's now acting jealous and saying that it's weird how close I'm getting to the woman. I told her that it's not weird. She's just the one person I get along with well in the group outside of her. Not weird, she's just the one person I get along with well in the group outside of her.
Speaker 2:My wife asked if I would make more of an effort to not just interact with her and I said no. I again said that the choice was hers. She could invite me to the hangout or not invite me, and I would respect it. Moreover, I'm not actually close to the woman. I don't have her number, we aren't connected on social media. I genuinely have no contact with her outside of the group. But if my wife is going to insist that I come to these things, I'm not going to go to force myself into having the worst time ever. My wife said that I'm an asshole for not putting her needs and wants first, but I told her that's selfish to claim, because she's basically telling me to put myself last regularly so she can both get to bring me to these hangouts but also discourage me from enjoying myself when I come. It seems controlling and petty. So I just said she can decide if she wants me there or not, but she does not get to dictate how I behave. So am I the asshole?
Speaker 1:Not at all. I don't think so, not at all.
Speaker 2:And I think it's crazy work that you said he was being selfish, because the whole reason that he's there is for you and he's giving you the choice he's getting like do you want me to come or not?
Speaker 1:Now look here.
Speaker 2:I'm on his side, I'm on his side too.
Speaker 1:I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna lie, because we've been in situations, even like with your family, like where it's like I used to tell all the time like it's not that I don't like going around your family, it's not that I don't, I don't have like much in common yeah, like somebody that you vibe with right so like when, the, when, the, when the few are there that I vibe with.
Speaker 1:I'm there and I'm interacting with them and I'm cool with that Because I vibe with them Right. So I get that. And she only has a problem with him vibing with the one individual because it's a woman.
Speaker 2:Because it's a woman, yeah. If it was a dude he was digging out, she wouldn't care. She wouldn't care If it was the interesting.
Speaker 1:You guys have similar interests. Yes, now look here. So that's where the insecurity kind of comes in what's her name on the that we, uh, we're talking today. Who the the one that on bench press? Jen the one with the curly hair, jen. Um, so, like jen, today I was like jen. I'm loving the shirt. Yeah, it was a naruto shirt. Yeah, that's it, yeah I don't take offense to that.
Speaker 1:I know you don't, but I'm saying like it's like when you find someone that's like in your niche as far as like your hobbies and your interests, right, you're going to be excited. Because now you're, because you're talking about something you're passionate about what?
Speaker 2:somebody else is passionate and then I can also enjoy my time here, because without this interaction I don't want to be here anyway. It's like. So now I can have an interaction and interact with them. Even if you're not amongst the group, you're still amongst the group.
Speaker 1:Look here, my wife knows I'm an Eagles fan. I don't come here and talk about day-to-day team activity. My wife, I'm like babe. If I said babe, they cut someone.
Speaker 2:So you're like, okay, what was his?
Speaker 1:position. So now, like you, wanted me to hang out with your people, right, I found my person inside your group, inside the group, and that's the other problem. It was my person, Right. So look, sir, you're not an asshole?
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're not the asshole at all, I agree.
Speaker 1:Look here and look here, and I think he's going above and beyond to protect her feelings because, like he said, I have no contact with this person outside of the group setting.
Speaker 2:But I think from her perspective she just don't like the idea of watching him laugh, cackle and giggle and have similar interests with another woman. They say you can't have cake and eat it too, kate and Edith too. No, you cannot. You cannot have cake and Edith, but ain't that what you're supposed to do.
Speaker 2:Bye, bye, that's what Trey said. All right, am I the asshole for calling out my cousin when she tried to blame her body odor on me? I'm an 18-year-old female from Ontario, canada, and my cousin is a 19-year-old female and she's from Florida, the USA. I'm staying with her family in Florida. We were out at midday at an outdoor restaurant and my cousin's boyfriend who's 20, was to meet us.
Speaker 2:My cousin had a sweaty body odor but she had an active day. My boyfriend, my boyfriend kissed me. Let's see. Oh yes, the boyfriend kissed my cousin and she introduced us at the table. He made a face when I was looking away. My cousin tried to whisper in his ear that the smell he was smelling was from her. She said her name, the cousin's name. I said the smell is not for me. The boyfriend got his nose close to my cousin's upper body and smelled her. He kissed her on the forehead and told her it's humanizing when such a beautiful woman gets all smelly. She laughed awkwardly on the ride home. She told me that I unnecessarily embarrassed her. She said I broke girl code. Am I the asshole?
Speaker 1:No, you're not going to blame your BO on me.
Speaker 2:But I think you're asking. But I love how he tried to still make her feel comfortable by making it like a joke, Like yeah, babe, it is you Look here, look here, but it's very humanizing for such a beautiful woman to have a body odor.
Speaker 1:As a man who has been with a woman for two and a half decades, I can honestly say that I have. It's very, very rare that I smell my wife stink.
Speaker 2:Even when I'm sweaty in the gym, you don't stink. Did I smell my wife stink? Even when I'm sweaty in the gym, you don't stink. Yeah, I don't, but I also wear perfume to the gym, so there's that too.
Speaker 1:But on the couple of times I've had, I've never been offended by it. I get it. We're all humans. The Lord knows, I know I be stinking Jesus.
Speaker 2:We ain't even going to talk about it.
Speaker 1:Okay, calm down. You got a little too excited.
Speaker 2:Calm down Because I know like when I'm out especially if I'm doing like yard work or anything in the garage. When you're doing something like really, laborious, I know.
Speaker 1:When I come in, like making me hug, I know I don't smell the best, yeah.
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't think anybody would if you've been outside working all day, that's crazy.
Speaker 1:I don't understand why she had to say she's Canadian I don't know if's your asshole at all um, and I don't think he embarrassed her and I fuck girl code. I don't, I don't. I don't understand what's the so girl code was. She was just supposed to accept to be the single and make her look, I'm not.
Speaker 2:She was just basically supposed to take one for the team, like listen if you and I know that I'm the smelling one, but I want to tell him that, like you're he can smell you. I was just gonna say that he's sitting next to you. He, he kissed you.
Speaker 1:I'm pretty sure he smelled you my thing is if that was a concern, why are you didn't freshen up before you got together, that's, she took you a whole bath. I don't know if the hoes on figueroa could take whole baths at 7-eleven. You can too.
Speaker 2:I can't okay, here's one. This this one was screenshotted in by a follower, ok, so she may have seen it somewhere else, I'm not sure, but this is what she sent in. I need help. I've got a faceless OnlyFans. Nobody knows it's me. Yesterday I asked my brother to borrow his phone because mine was dead. He gave me his passcode. I made a quick call to my baby's daddy. Then I saw an email pop up labeled subscription renewed, with my OnlyFans username. My heart dropped. I went into his safari, pulled up the site and it was me. My own brother is subscribed, not just subscribed. He's one of my biggest tippers. I feel absolutely sick. I can't stop thinking about it. He doesn't know it's me, but now I do. I don't know what to do. Do I block him and keep my anonymity, or let him keep tipping because he's just another quote-unquote fan? I've been sitting here in shock, feeling violated, disgusted and confused all at once. This is next level twisted. Do I tell my baby daddy like, please?
Speaker 1:I need some advice okay, I will start by saying that I don't think this is real. Okay, I don't think this is real but I want to answer as if I, if, as if, as if it.
Speaker 2:Okay, I think, first it's hilarious. I think first it's hilarious. It's hilarious.
Speaker 1:And I thought about this. I said would I? Now I don't have OnlyFans account so I don't see but would I be able to recognize one of my sisters? And I don't think I would, because I have not seen my sisters naked.
Speaker 2:Nor do you want to see them naked, nor do I want to.
Speaker 1:I have not seen my sisters naked, nor do you want to see them naked, Nor do I want to.
Speaker 2:But if we're just you know, if you did look at OnlyFans and you were subscribed and there was a particular woman you were subscribed to, Well, I would know because my sister got tattoos. And came to find out that it was your sister.
Speaker 1:I'd be disgusted. How would you feel I'd be disgusted?
Speaker 2:okay, but this is wild though but but would you want your sister to tell you, or would you tell your sister you could have kept that shit to yourself? I would say tell me okay, because you don't want to keep subscribing, renewing and dipping right, I mean but you're taking care of your sister's household, so you're like helping her through high school, but then you also gotta know that you got right whole year's right.
Speaker 1:I think this is funny, right and okay. If this is real, the part about I'm gonna shout out to my baby daddy, what is he gonna do? He don't your brother, he don't know. Like you cannot put somebody at blame.
Speaker 2:No, I don't think she was trying to blame, I think she's just. I think she's just like that conversation's gonna be awkward she's just taken back like, oh my gosh, you know. And then if you do have the conversation, how do you have a conversation with your brother about that like, do you sit him down and be like, hey, bro, are you like on OnlyFans?
Speaker 1:like that.
Speaker 2:I would say just block him, or that's what I was gonna say just block him. I would just block him so that way you can.
Speaker 1:He got them screenshots anyway, so just know that.
Speaker 2:I mean, she didn't specify what she does on OnlyFans.
Speaker 1:She's faceless, to my knowledge like. Onlyfans isn't just like she busting it open 2D stuff.
Speaker 2:She busting it wide open that's probably why she felt disgusted her brother was seeing all her stuff.
Speaker 1:Oh wow, it's crazy work it's probably like Arby's down there too, because she's got a baby. Daddy, she got a kid. She didn't put the kid out.
Speaker 2:Why, Maurice?
Speaker 1:We have the meat.
Speaker 2:Arby's, we have the meat. I can't. You're terrible, that's wild.
Speaker 1:I don't think that's real, though. Okay, you think's why? I don't think that's real though, okay, you think it's real.
Speaker 2:You think that's real. I mean, you never know. I think it's very far-fetched, but I don't, I don't know. Okay, all right, um, am I overreacting? My wife has been sneaking out of bed at night and I finally followed her. Now I can't look at her the same, okay, would I be an asshole for confronting her?
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:I'm a 33-year-old male. I've been married to my wife, who's 31, for five years. Things have always been good. We laugh a lot, our intimacy has been solid and never had a reason to not trust her. But for the past month she's been waking up around 2 to 3 am and slipping out of bed. At first I thought maybe she was having trouble sleeping, but she's always tiptoeing and closes the door quietly like she doesn't want me to notice. Last night my gut wouldn't let me ignore it anymore, so I pretended to be asleep and I followed her.
Speaker 2:She went into the living room with her phone, sat on the couch and just in her robe, and started whispering into her AirPods. I couldn't hear anything, but I definitely caught her laughing softly and at one point she said I can't talk long, he's asleep in the other room. My first thought was maybe she was talking to her parents because they live overseas, so the time difference would make sense. But she hasn't mentioned calling them lately and honestly, we rarely talk about them unless I bring it up. The entire thing just seemed and felt off. I froze. I wanted to walk in and confront her, but instead I just stood there.
Speaker 2:She eventually came back to bed, crawled up next to me like nothing happened this morning. I asked casually if everything was okay and she just smiled and said yeah, all is good. Now I feel sick. I love her more than anything, but I can't shake what I heard. Am I wrong for wanting to demand her phone? Or would I be overreacting? And I'm reading into. Who is she talking to? We got to you don't know who she's talking to, so instead of going straight to having to go through her phone.
Speaker 2:I would just ask her point blank first.
Speaker 1:I would just ask her straight up yeah, straight up and then, if that still doesn't, satisfy you, and I want to know why you can't talk to her. Because that right there is suspicious. Suspicious Because if you weren't someone, you uh, it was okay to talk to you when you could talk to her for as long as you want, but you creep out of bed in the middle of the night doing whole activities, she doing whole activities whole activities.
Speaker 2:Why does it have to be?
Speaker 1:because hold all your friends and hold all your enemies what if she's planning like a big surprise? Yeah, that's what? Okay, shoot her bell, here we go maybe she's planning like you're gonna go her gonna uh that girl call we talked about earlier. Go ahead and shoot her bail. Go ahead and shoot her bail.
Speaker 2:Maybe she's planning a really big party.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's why she had to fondle her robe a little bit. She didn't fondle her robe.
Speaker 2:She put her robe on to exit the bedroom she didn't want to be around the house just in her nightie. It's probably cold. There's no telling where they live. I mean, you have to think about this in a 360. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she 360 fucking.
Speaker 2:Bye, okay, but in any case, I me personally I would simply ask her hey, I overheard you on the phone last night. Who were you talking to? Okay, just like that, okay, okay. And then after that I would ask her well, I've noticed that you step out of the bedroom or say that first, I noticed that you like step out of the bedroom a couple of nights a week.
Speaker 1:Like who are you talking to on the phone? You want to ward it nicely.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, because you don't want to, you don't want to come off like accusing right off the top because you don't know what it could be.
Speaker 1:Fuck that no-transcript.
Speaker 2:And then, if she don't want you to look at the phone, you're not helping my nerves.
Speaker 1:Ding dong.
Speaker 2:You're not helping my nerves, ma'am.
Speaker 1:Ding dong, because now you don't want to give up the phone.
Speaker 2:and if you, don't want to give up the phone. But what if she says you have to respect my privacy? Okay, that's I. I I hear what you're saying, but I'm coming to you with an issue and it's like we're gonna have to come to it. I'm not asking to have full, like look through everything, I just want to check out what you're telling me, that's all is that so?
Speaker 1:I mean, that's what I would do, that's what you would do, that's what I would do, okay but you know I'm me.
Speaker 2:so yeah, whore, bye your mama. Wow, let's see. Let's do a couple of more. Okay, am I the asshole for giving my pregnant girlfriend an ultimatum?
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:My girlfriend Jen and I have been together for four years. Back in April, two great things happened. We found out Jen is pregnant and I closed on a house for us to move into.
Speaker 2:We found out Jen is pregnant and I closed on a house for us to move into Our family and friends know about the pregnancy, including Jen's best friend from her childhood, amanda. Okay, I will admit I never liked the dynamic between Amanda and Jen, but it didn't really affect our relationship, since Amanda lived across the country. After finding out about the pregnancy, amanda decided to move back home. We live in Jen and Amanda's hometown. Amanda has been back since late May and all hell has broken loose.
Speaker 2:Jen has always felt a little self-conscious in our relationship. I work construction and I do personal training. She feels intimidated by small girls, but I have no idea why. She is a sexy, curvy woman. Amanda has done nothing but play into Jen's insecurities and anxieties.
Speaker 2:Since being back, jen and I have never been the tracking location couple or looking through phones couple. We always considered that a red flag in a relationship. Amanda has convinced Jen that she needs to start doing both, so she's been looking through my phone on a regular and finding nothing. I have communicated my hurt and frustration and that I think she needs to distance herself from Amanda. She kept rebuttaling my concerns.
Speaker 2:About two weeks ago, jen again asked to look through my phone. I told her in no uncertain terms that this will be the last time she looks through my phone. If she again sees nothing suspicious, she needs to agree to go to counseling and distance herself from Amanda. She agreed, she looked through my phone and found nothing suspicious, but she soon reneged on her promise to do counseling and distancing herself from Amanda. I decided to move out. We are currently on a month-to-month lease in an apartment until our renovations get done on the house that I bought. I'm staying with a friend until the house is ready and then I will move in alone. Jen has asked me to reconsider and I refuse. She will likely need to move in with her mother, which is not ideal given the limited space which I feel terrible about for my child. But am I the asshole?
Speaker 1:I don't think so. You don't think she's the asshole.
Speaker 2:Like he's the asshole for like putting her out the house though.
Speaker 1:No, I don't think he's the asshole for the ultimatum. Oh, okay, now that's the house part. A little much, because she is carrying your child yeah, but that's part of the ultimatum.
Speaker 2:The child's part, no, the ultimate. He basically is saying that. I mean he said in no uncertain terms that if she asked to look through the phone again and she didn't find anything, she would agree to distance herself from Amanda and also do counseling.
Speaker 1:As soon as she found nothing.
Speaker 2:She didn't do it, so he's like in his perspective I paid for the house. I bought a house for you, the baby and myself, but nonetheless it is still my house.
Speaker 1:I still don't think he's an asshole. Okay, because don't think he's an asshole. Okay, because she Renigged On the terms.
Speaker 2:She agreed to the terms To get what she wanted.
Speaker 1:And then backed out Mm-hmm. So this seems like a lack of accountability on her part. Okay, and I'm hopefully a man that has room for her and the baby. He sounds like he's going to be a great father.
Speaker 2:I think it could also be one of those things where Amanda is jealous and Amanda is jeopardizing Jen's situation and Jen can't see it, because Amanda really wants Jen's position.
Speaker 1:Oh, come on now, because we all know, you know, I like it when you get messy.
Speaker 2:We all know that that is a real thing Right. And so now all of a sudden, you know she's back in the mix. She's back home putting all these ideas in Jen's head, and then Jen is pregnant. That's true, so that's also playing a major part with her hormones.
Speaker 1:You know what Jen probably been telling Amanda, how amazing he is.
Speaker 2:She probably has. And it's like even when she told her like oh my gosh, we're pregnant because Jen lived across the country, because I thought the flying back was weird, but she didn't fly back, she moved back.
Speaker 1:I thought that was weird. Personally, I said that's weird.
Speaker 2:Like I love you, we besties and all. I'm going to come visit for like a month, but I'm going back home Because I couldn't figure out why she had to move back.
Speaker 1:I was like to me that's weird.
Speaker 2:Just because your best friend is pregnant, yeah, okay. So for me, like we don't know all the details around it, but you know, taking matters into my own hands, that's what I would say. But I think Jen probably on some level, is jealous, most definitely, or Amanda is jealous of Jenen. And, like oprah said, you cannot be friends with people who even have an ounce of jealousy or anything towards you. Not, she said, not even with you. Good damn bye. Good damn bye, sir, damn bye. Why are my friends with you? But, like she said, not it not, not even in one ounce and I think, uh
Speaker 1:I think jen's got herself one of them friends, unfortunately it's a lot of things I'm I'm confused why she had to move back, because it seemed like that she moved back and then just started shit, just basically just started stirring the pot she did, and, and the poor girl is pregnant, so it's not that hard to do, and that's what I'm saying, and then now her hormones.
Speaker 1:I'm saying, I'm thinking jen is pregnant, she not in her right mind because lord knows y'all wouldn't be and then, like y'all going through pregnancy, y'all going through so, and then like he said, y'all going through pregnancy.
Speaker 2:Y'all going through so much. And he said he's a trainer. So Amanda's probably like oh my gosh Girl, do you trust him being around? All those like thick skinny girls?
Speaker 1:Because Jenna's, like I'm already. I was already a bigger girl, which I like them thick too. He said she was curvy. He said he meant that Bye and and he said she's sexy eight. She said so, she like. So Jenna's like I'm over here getting bigger and he around all these guinea bitches training all day, Cause he in it, yeah See.
Speaker 2:That's what Amanda did. She came in and she got a big wooden spoon and that's the thing about.
Speaker 1:That's the thing about insecurities. It's like that's the.
Speaker 2:That's the thing about having sorry ass friends. Um, okay, here we go, let's see we can do like one more. Okay, am I the asshole for telling my daughter how much older boyfriend isn't welcomed in our home?
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Okay, I'm 48. My husband is 46 and we have a 20 year old daughter, whose name is Ellie, who is currently on vacation from college. About five months or so ago, ellie told us that she had had a new boyfriend. We'll call him Tom. This came rather out of nowhere and out of the blue, as Ellie hadn't mentioned seeing anyone or that she was dating, but both my husband and I were supportive and happy for her. However, ellie was strangely secretive about the whole situation. Usually she's an open book, especially with me, and would always share details of her personal life. On this occasion, she wouldn't show any pictures and we knew next to no information about Tom or other than that they met at a party through mutual friends. Ellie spent the past month of her vacation in college in her college town and the plan was always for her to come back this weekend. Ellie asked if she could bring tom with her for a few days on the trip, as they were getting pretty serious and she wanted us to meet him. Although we mentioned that we barely knew anything about him, ellie expressed that we would be surprised and that we would love him, given he's clearly an important part of our daughter's life. We agreed and said we looked forward to spending the weekend with them together.
Speaker 2:Yesterday morning we went to pick up Ellie and Tom from the airport to drive them to our place and we were shocked. We knew instantly that Tom was much older than Ellie and he certainly wasn't a college student. I was just in a state of surprise, but I didn't want to cause a scene and told my husband to do the same. We drove home, but it was a frosty journey, which Ellie commented on. When we arrived, my husband point blank asked Tom how old he was. Tom said he was 44. Shit. I was immediately disgusted. He's only two years younger than my husband and old enough to be Ellie's father. My husband continued to interrogate him, asking him how they met, the whole background, etc. Ellie explained that it was at a party and Tom was there because he was well known around town and they realized that they had a lot in common and hit it off from there.
Speaker 2:I really didn't want to hear anymore and my husband told Tom to leave. Ellie shouted and said how unfair it was and we hadn't even given Tom a chance and that he would make her happy. I'm sure he would. Tom could sense the tension, so left and Ellie followed right behind him. I texted Ellie to tell her that we'd love to see her and to come over to discuss the situation. She asked if Tom was welcome and I said that he was not. Therefore, after labeling me a judgmental asshole, she told me she wasn't coming and that they would be staying at a local hotel and catching up with friends. I feel terrible about the whole situation and I don't want to lose my daughter over this. My husband isn't budging at all and says that he would have to be held back if he ever saw that man again. Am I the asshole for saying that he isn't welcome or did I not do the right thing?
Speaker 1:You're not the asshole.
Speaker 2:I think that's a genuine concern.
Speaker 1:Here's why I'm saying you're not the asshole, you're not the asshole. Yeah, I think that's a genuine concern. Here's why I'm saying that that's all.
Speaker 2:You're not the asshole because you said at the end, your husband is emulging, because that means that if tom showed back up, he said he, your husband said you're gonna have to hold me back.
Speaker 1:It's gonna be some problem swinging on him, so you have to think you have to think about your husband, because your husband well you may be able to work up and come around to it your your husband said I don't give a damn, absolutely not. And I'm on your husband's side.
Speaker 2:He said, not us being two years apart. Sir, she's 20 years old, absolutely not.
Speaker 1:Because at first I'm looking at myself like how do you have daddy issues? What did I do? I'm still with your mama. Why do you have daddy? Why are you bringing this?
Speaker 2:old mama to my house. I don't think that's how that works. All the time, guys.
Speaker 1:This is weird. It brings me back to that. It really is a delicate situation, though.
Speaker 2:It is because he's 24 years her senior, Like that's wild. I mean, she couldn't hear the house. He was 24 years old when she was born.
Speaker 1:I thought he was pedophile 24 when she was born. I'm sorry you can't say that out loud. Pdf file.
Speaker 2:Okay, but that brings me. That brings me to um. There was a viral clip that was going around a few months ago and, you know, the guy was on the street asking uh men like you know what's the the age range they date? And he was a man in his 40s and he said that he wouldn't date anybody older than like 25 and the reasons that he gave that he wouldn't date a woman who was like at that 25 mark he said his words were um, because he can show her things and he wants to be like.
Speaker 2:He wants to be the person to give her her experiences, like if she's never been on a trip. He wants to be the one to take her on that trip.
Speaker 1:He wants to be the one to buy her a first. You know what that?
Speaker 2:sounds like to me Sounds like grooming.
Speaker 1:Yes, and it sounds like I have nothing to offer women my age because they can see through my bullshit Right.
Speaker 2:So I can dangle pretty things in front of a young girl and she's going to think the world of me.
Speaker 1:And I will call him. And that's what it is. You want to think the world of me and I would call him a bitch too.
Speaker 2:He wants her to look at him like you are my everything, like my man, my man, my man. But women in his age group are going to require more than you taking me on a trip or buying me a handbag or like doing, doing surface level shit.
Speaker 1:I always say that a woman that got her shit together can require a lot more from the woman that started out.
Speaker 2:But, but that's what they know.
Speaker 1:I think it's I think it's.
Speaker 2:I think it's the lack of life experience, and not to say that 20 year olds are, just like you know, dumb they're not you know very smart right, and I like to think that I was a pretty responsible, smart 20 something year old too. However, I also know, now, going into my 40s, looking back on my 20s, you don't know what you don't know. And when you're dating someone who has a little bit more life experience and who actually knows some things.
Speaker 2:You can seem like the dynamic between somebody who has a 24 year gap in between them is crazy.
Speaker 1:That's a lot, but I can see the appeal in it.
Speaker 2:From her perspective dating a more older, mature, experienced man, her experiences with him is a lot different, right.
Speaker 1:But then his experiences with her and when Grandpa picks up his newborn from kindergarten up.
Speaker 2:But think about it right If you're a 20-something, right.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to think about it.
Speaker 2:Well, I'm just saying from my perspective as, like a girl being 20, dating someone who is 44, if I'm, like, physically attracted to him, I don't see him as 44. But the experiences that I have with him, like even going on dates, our dates are more intellectual, our dates are more thoughtful and intentful. And then I look at the boys or the young men that are in my age group and that just ain't happening. But my mental level is at that capacity that would be very alluring for me, right, and if he's established, like he's already established, he's got some life experience, and then for him it's like everything is still new for her.
Speaker 2:She's still in college. She don't know what it's like to be still new for her. She's still in college. She don't know what it's like to be on her own yet.
Speaker 1:Like.
Speaker 2:I can mold her, I can shape her.
Speaker 1:First of all, I'm going to just say this If you are a 40-year-old man walking into college parties, you're fucking weird.
Speaker 2:No, he's well known in the town.
Speaker 1:That's because he's going to college parties.
Speaker 2:He's weird college parties he's weird, but we don't know he might own the catering company or something that's weird no, that's weird, you don't know why. He's well known I, as a 30 Tom might be that dude.
Speaker 1:As a 39, I'm 39.
Speaker 2:Uh huh, proudly, 39 you're not gonna go party with your niece.
Speaker 1:I don't wanna party with nobody who ain't at least 31.
Speaker 2:I want to party with people who get tired and that's kind of a stretch.
Speaker 1:I want to party with people who get tired, people who ain't got to work in the morning, who got shit to do tomorrow. Right, I'm not up to 2, 3 in the morning, no more.
Speaker 2:Nobody do I want to be. I get tired at 7.30.
Speaker 1:I'm ready to lay down at 7.30.
Speaker 2:At 7.30. I'm now at 730. And 730. Tom Rader is 730. Tom.
Speaker 1:Ass is weird. You think he's weird?
Speaker 2:But what if he's like one of those young 44-year-olds?
Speaker 1:He's weird, he's weird.
Speaker 2:And then I love how she's like we're calling Tom.
Speaker 1:Tom sounds like somebody who peaked in his 30s. And he's still like, and he's still like and he's trying to ride it while he can. But what if?
Speaker 2:he's like one of those 44 year olds where he don't feel 44 and it just sucks that that's the age he is, but really he's like 28 at heart, will you go out there and get you another 44 year old that don't feel, 44, that's active.
Speaker 1:Get somebody that's 38, at least 24 years is wild.
Speaker 2:He couldn't help who he fell for they hit it off.
Speaker 1:All right, I'm teasing you.
Speaker 2:How would you feel if Phoenix at 20?
Speaker 1:brought home a 44-year-old. I'm shooting the nigga. It's on sight. We're not even talking, I'm swinging. I'm swinging, but she's like dad, I love him and you're going to love him when we're both in jail, because I'm going to whoop his ass.
Speaker 2:And then he's going to hit you with she's a grown woman. Oh then I got to get involved.
Speaker 1:See, see, now you got mad huh, because that just rubbed me the wrong way.
Speaker 2:Because I feel like men like that would say some shit like that. They'd be like but she's an adult, she's a grown woman. If you know, wrong woman, if you, that's right, that's right, that's right, that's right that motherfucker, that, uh, that he was from some country.
Speaker 1:He was like well, the legal age of consent here is 16, so I can find a 16 year old attractive and I said you can get your ass kicked too, go ahead I mean, if they change the legal age to marry 14, what you go? I'm whooping, I'm shooting I'm shooting, I'm shooting, I'm shooting, I'm shooting. I ain't playing that shit.
Speaker 2:Could you imagine I would be like Phoenix. What in the world, in what capacity were you guys, even in the same vicinity, for you to even have a conversation where you think you are in love with this man If they think I don't play about you, I don't play about Phoenix. Lord, protect my baby.
Speaker 1:Protect me, Because I can't Because I'm look here I may not look good in orange, but I will rock it. Bye.
Speaker 2:I may not look good in orange. However, I can make it work.
Speaker 1:Alright, guys, we're going to jump into a new segment here.
Speaker 2:Oh, we are, yeah a bit to a new segment here.
Speaker 1:Oh, we are. Yeah, what's the new segment and I'm gonna point out each week I'm gonna pick two comments and I want to read them. That were my favorite comments that I and I. Honestly it's kind of hard because y'all be commenting, we can't keep up with all these comments y'all, but y'all are funny, hilarious and we absolutely love it. Now this goes back to the reaction video about how the son didn't want nothing to do with her. Then he got sick. Now he want her to help pay. Oh, yeah.
Speaker 1:And this young lady's comment was stand on his words like a podium. And I said look here. I have never heard a better way to say her. I've never read a better way to say stand on business.
Speaker 2:And that was from a linear photography.
Speaker 1:She stands on his words like a podium.
Speaker 2:If my money wasn't good, and she yelled it, she yelled it, she yelled it.
Speaker 1:If my money wasn't good, then my money ain't good now.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:And the last one, this one, I laughing. Okay, this is about, uh, the fort, the husband with the fort, the fiance with the forts and the shit with the door open oh gosh. She said I can't let Y'all Not Tootie Booty. Y'all be taking me, y'all be taking me out.
Speaker 2:Nikki Lou 11, not Tootie Booty Let.
Speaker 1:Tootie Booty go.
Speaker 2:Let Tootie Booty go. Oh my god, I should put that on a shirt.
Speaker 1:Let Tootie Booty go. And I don't know I'ma find the comments, the one that said Keep playing with me, i'ma leave at that playground, I said because, ma'am, you need to trademark that I said this is it this is the one you guys are hilarious, we love y'all we appreciate all the interactions.
Speaker 2:We appreciate all of our new family to the life. After I do podcast.
Speaker 1:I guess are they our booskies, booskies. We appreciate all the new booskies, our booskies, yeah, our booskies.
Speaker 2:Booskironies, booskies. We appreciate all the new booskies joining the fam. Like always, you guys continue to follow us on Instagram, facebook, youtube, tiktok. Only pans.
Speaker 1:Not after today.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, we don't want to.
Speaker 1:Sorry, we're going to cut that one. Don't do that one. We don't want our brothers to find this.
Speaker 2:Shut up, shut up, always remember. You can write into the podcast at lifeafteridopodcasts at gmailcom. You can remain anonymous if you like, but yes, and every week you get a new episode.
Speaker 1:I will say we do get all the messages.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Some of them. We love y'all, we love y'all, we love y'all, we appreciate it, all of it. All of it.
Speaker 2:However.
Speaker 1:Sometimes. Y'all should probably throw some of these in chat, gtp, and just have them. Correct the grammar, bye.
Speaker 2:It's cool. Luckily we can read how you're talking. We get some of it.
Speaker 1:We get it All right. Yes, now luckily we can. We can read like, we can read like how you're talking, so we get something. We get it all right, but yeah, till next time till next time booskies.
