Life After I Do Podcast
Marriage and relationships can be tough. You may feel like you’re the only one struggling but you’re not. Life After I do is a weekly podcast where Morice and Kynesha, a black married millennial couple, share their experiences and advice on everything from kids and family to intimacy and connection. Noting is off limits.
In their 21 years together and 7 years of marriage, Morice and Kynesha have learned a lot about what it takes to make a relationship work. They know the importance of communication, trust and commitment. They also know it’s okay to not have it all figured out.
Join them every Wednesday as they talk about their own journey of “Life After I do”.
Life After I Do Podcast
Loving Through Responsibility
This week, we’re talking about responsible love—the kind that shows up, adapts, and puts in effort even when it’s inconvenient.
We unpack the emotional labor of being present when life is overwhelming, how love needs to evolve as we grow, and why it’s important not to lose yourself while showing up for someone else.
From managing work-home balance to honoring small promises, we keep it honest about what makes love last.
If you’ve ever felt burnt out in your relationship, or like you're giving more than you’re getting, this episode is full of perspective and real-life insight.
Thanks for rocking with us! Don’t forget to follow Life After I Do so you never miss an episode. Got a relationship situation you want us to weigh in on? Hit us at https://linktr.ee/lifeafteridopodcast — we just might talk about it in a future episode.
You like babe, okay, you're you. You hype right now. I know what you're saying. Things look like, but let me tell you it's not. It's you. You looking at the, you looking at the window when it's got dust on it. Let me Windex it for you.
Speaker 2:So I can show you a better view.
Speaker 1:Goodbye so I can show you a better view. Hey, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of life after I do podcast. Yes, how's it going, booskies? It's going good I can't with you there is a fly in here and I feel like he is going to drive me absolutely crazy. Start the episode about the fly again, but he just like, oh goodness, I don't know, there's just been like.
Speaker 2:I feel like there's been an increase every summer we go through an increase of flies, I know I'd rather have.
Speaker 1:I'd rather have the flies than the.
Speaker 2:It's the flies in the summer, it's the pincher bugs in the winter.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was going to say I think I would rather have the flies than the pincher bugs, though I mean I would rather not have either but, Honestly, it's the flies and the wasps. The wasp nest, don't the wasps eat the flies, so the wasps must be losing, okay. So remember, when I was asking, I was like who eats who?
Speaker 2:Because I don't understand how all of them are collectively here. The flies eat shit. I feel like flies eat shit.
Speaker 1:You know what the flies were eating today.
Speaker 2:What that dead bird your dog killed in the backyard. Oh, wow, wow. I walked outside I said I don't know how she caught this bird, but she killed the bird and then just left it there.
Speaker 1:The bird got caught slipping. Was it a little bird? Yeah, it was probably a little like.
Speaker 2:No, it was probably a jaybird. It was like a jaybird. I said it wasn't. It wasn't a chick, it was an actual bird, I said, and even eat it. She just killed it and just left it here, I guess she.
Speaker 1:I was like, she was like I was trying to play with it. Then it just stopped moving. I was like are you leaving this here so the other birds don't have?
Speaker 2:to come fuck with you. Because when I grabbed the shovel and threw it in the trash can? She was even like that's my hard work, like what are you doing? I said, look here, we don't leave cockerels around. Only that birch around here is chicken.
Speaker 1:Bye, you hear me, except if it's the neighborhood chicken.
Speaker 2:No, because if I can't stop motherfuckers from eating, no one agrees to.
Speaker 1:I feel like everybody now knows like we have a neighborhood chicken, there's two of them. Well, I've only ever seen one, I've never seen them together. But we all know like collectively in this, like housing community and the next housing, it's the neighborhood chicken and at any random time you can find him walking on the top part of like the the brick of friends.
Speaker 2:No, that motherfucking comes around when you seed your grass well whenever you see him.
Speaker 1:He was in our backyard one time and I was like, when I first saw him, I was like why is there a chicken in the backyard and how did you get here? And then, um, and then we realized that he was like going from house to house. He gets on top of the roof. Sometimes we took a family walk. He, there's a, um, there's a tree that he likes to hang out by, and then there's a lady that's in the actual neighborhood and she feeds him so I was like anywhere yeah, he has it pretty good, he does.
Speaker 1:He gets. There's got to be a two-for-one special. He can live free range. The second he get caught, no one's gonna no one's gonna catch him. I wonder where he came from, though, and then we're all just like around here letting him just run free right around here somewhere. He just go back home when he want to. I've never known chickens.
Speaker 2:Just go out and take a walk and then go back. Oh, but what's diabolical is the amount of stray cats you would. You would think he would have been caught now.
Speaker 1:No, that's why I said he's the neighborhood chicken, like we all respect that. He's the neighborhood chicken, even the cats, right, we all respect that all he do. Literally all he does is just walk around the neighborhood in different yards, the one lady feeds him and then, wherever he goes, he goes Well, speaking of birds, how was your week, booski? Wow, why would you say that that was a terrible transition? What are you talking about? Speaking of birds, I called you a bird. Wow, that's rude, is it? Yeah?
Speaker 2:That's rude, you, my bird.
Speaker 1:No, that was rude. I feel like you should apologize to me. Okay, that was rude. It hurt my feelings. I now you want to start over you know, you know the word is right the bird is the word. My week was good. Well, my week it was. My week was overall suboptimal. Yeah, it was a little sad. It was a little sad.
Speaker 2:Yeah, couldn't squat, couldn't squat, nope, because I have a hip pitch it's funny, you couldn't squat, but y'all you and your daughter was gassy.
Speaker 1:Goodbye so, yeah, I have a uh, I have a hip pitch on my right side right now, so I have my chiropractor appointment. I'm really hoping my chiropractor can work that out for me because, like I was, like I was, that sounds like a muscle issue. That's not a chiropractor.
Speaker 2:Well, work that out for me Because, like I was, like I was, that sounds like a muscle issue. That's not a chiropractor.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, I'm hoping that between a massage and my chiropractor appointment it can do something. Okay, and I was trying to like I was trying to push through because you know me like I can push through a little bit of discomfort.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, you push it, I can push this concept if I go heavier, the weight will push me down more and I won't be able to feel it as much. How?
Speaker 1:that worked for you. It did not, and by the time I got to my 225 warm-up I did.
Speaker 2:Oh wow, not the warm-up. Oh, flex on them goodbye.
Speaker 1:When I got to my warm-up, I had did the 225 and after like the third rep, I was like I'm not gonna be able to walk if I don't stop. So, but other than that, like I feel, you know, and then I had to have the whole conversation with myself. This is just part of the journey, you know what I mean. Like it's not always going to be your body's not always going to be in the best of like shape and form to do the things that you want to do, yeah.
Speaker 1:So I was like don't let it be a brain thing, because for me I was kind of like it was kind of like what? I was kind of like no, like, I have to really make sure it's not nothing I just like really lean into, because my brain will easily be like well, I tried it and see what happened to what I tried. It got effed up, so I'm not going to do it anymore. Like, and that's where I was kind of headed to her and I was gonna do it anymore. No, like, and that's where I was kind of headed to her and I was like see, I was like now, now, now I'm not, what's the point? What's the point? What's the point?
Speaker 1:so, um, really, I'm just, I'm vibing no, don't, don't, don't, don't do that you're gonna irritate me don't do that, don't do that you're gonna irritate me um don't do that, but yeah, so I was just like listen we're not gonna do that did you say linda, was just like listen we're not going to do that, did you say Linda?
Speaker 1:No, I said listen, just listen, we're not literally to myself. I was like we're not going to do that. This comes with the territory, you know. And then I started, I started seeing um, that's how I know your phone be listening. Sometimes you start getting all the videos where I started getting the ones where it's like nobody talks about how hard it is to go from here to here, or like people who've like actually had like big injuries and they were like tip-top athletes but then they went through a huge injury and they had to take like a year off or a year and a half, but then they came back and I was like girl, calm down, like your, your legs still work.
Speaker 2:You're just going through a little something right now.
Speaker 1:You're completely out of commission but, but I was just I. I think this is, this is the mental portion of um. Working out like this is the the mental workout. You know what I mean? That's the part where I have to push through. When I'm like, when my brain wants to be like girl, just sit down, Like you know let me sit my stupid ass down, you know.
Speaker 1:So I was just like, nope, I'm just going to work my accessories and I'm going to try to be great in every other aspect, and it just take it for what it is.
Speaker 2:And it was great. That's it the greatest I faithfulness, yeah, and that's it the greatest I have faith on this yeah, my week was cool. That's good.
Speaker 1:I'm just you know you you know what was the highlight of your week? You.
Speaker 2:Pressure, show me pressure.
Speaker 1:What was the low light of your week? You Bye, goodbye you, you. Okay, I had no low lights this week. That's good. I'm happy to hear that it was pretty even okay, and stevens.
Speaker 2:Okay, you know, I'm really just. I'm really starting to just accept things as they are and I'm just starting to just roll with the punches. I'm not, I'm not feeding any energy into anything that is not productive. Exactly exactly that's what I'm.
Speaker 1:So so therapy be working, yeah but I, I think that's where the growth comes from. Goodbye, I think that's where the growth comes from. When you're in the growth, just just growth and maturity and mental toughness. You just hit a wink. Huh, yeah, I did. That's where the growth comes from, because now you're able to recognize it ain't worth it. Yeah, like you're able to take a step back and be like you know what. It's not going to be conducive to anything if I feed into what's not serving me right now, because it's like lowest hanging fruit. It's the easiest thing to do, right, it's literally the easiest thing to do like, like how I was saying with you know, with my squat, the easiest thing for me to do was to be like and I'm giving up and I'm done and I'm done so, but think that's that's where the growth comes from, where you're able to take that little step back and say you know what, like marie is you're blowing it up bigger than what it really is, you know what?
Speaker 2:and here's the thing is. I know that I'm starting to get to the point, to where my normal day-to-day conversations are certain like talking points I don't even want to entertain no more. I'm like this is like old news, I don't care, this don't interest me no more. This has no benefit to me. Can we talk about something positive? Can we talk about how we're gonna get this money bye? Can we talk about how we're gonna get this?
Speaker 1:this money Bye. Can we talk about how we're going to get this money? That's what I would prefer to talk about. That's what we're trying to get to yeah, but yeah, I think that's really when you think about that. It's growth, that's growth.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it is.
Speaker 1:Look at that. Would you cut it out with the winking? What are?
Speaker 2:The growth. Okay, look by, now they know how I feel about you. Okay, do they. And the growth.
Speaker 1:Cut it out with the growth.
Speaker 2:You said it. It's weird. Well, people, today's going to be a little bit different. My wife has ordered me.
Speaker 1:I haven't ordered you to do anything. Let's not start off with lies. She hasn't ordered me. Let's start the episode with lies she has employed me.
Speaker 2:She wants me to take lead on this. I said I'll lead every other aspect of our lives, goodbye. And I got to do this too. Oh my gosh, it's rough.
Speaker 1:You guys know what I'm dealing with over here. It's rough. You know what I'm dealing with over here. So roles are a little reversed today. So, babe, what are we?
Speaker 2:getting into today. Are we trading spaces Like trading places?
Speaker 1:No, I knew you were going to reference that song.
Speaker 2:Please don't no.
Speaker 1:What are we getting into this evening?
Speaker 2:Today we're going to talk about responsibility and love Okay, right and unpacking the emotional weight of showing up every day, even when you don't want to.
Speaker 1:And let me tell you, boy, there's some days, there's some days.
Speaker 2:About being responsible in love, even when it's not convenient. Okay, and there is some inconveniences.
Speaker 1:You think you're such a sunshine. Oh, I know I'm not. No, I know that I'm not, and you know how I know that I'm not, because there are times where I'm feeling that way and the only thing that I can do is make sure that I'm not a sunshine.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, well, at least you admit it, but when I say it so it's cool when you do it.
Speaker 1:No, wait, okay, wait, it's a problem when I do it so we went and saw the comedian uh ali sadiq, right, and he was talking about how, like at his age now, he was like I don't, I don't really get sad, right, and he's like, but when I do get sad, I can't keep it to myself okay, he was like I like to share it with everybody. So he was like I'll go into a random store and I'll walk straight in and I'll just be like can I speak to the manager?
Speaker 1:damn so the manager will come out and he said I just ask what's your policy on on theft? And the manager be like what he said, because we all know the managers don't do shit, so I'm gonna make you work today. So then he says so, then that gets the manager out to the sales floor. He said and all I do is I walk around for about 20 to 30 minutes picking up stuff and putting it down back in random places, and all he do is follow me around the whole day. And so he was like and then, after he does that, he was like maybe another time, and then he walks out and he was like and I feel better, and I was like oh see, that's how you share giving, you give and you share.
Speaker 1:So that's why some asshole shit so that's why I said I know, when I'm in one of those moods, I want to, I want to share anyway, I have brought this to you.
Speaker 2:I'm teasing. I have brought this to you because I was thinking the other day about how, in our marriage and in relationships in general, how I am responsible or we both are equally responsible for the love we share, and that means showing up for each other when we're not in the same room for each other and when it's not easy. When it's not easy, it's doing the right thing when the wrong thing is so enticing.
Speaker 1:When the lowest hanging fruit is right there for you to grab and get full off of.
Speaker 2:Right when she keep wearing that outfit trying to entice me. Oh wow, I said, nipples go back somewhere.
Speaker 1:First of all. First of all, now we know who she is if you've been around for a little while, you'll know that we have given nicknames to some of the regulars at our local gym, and one of the nicknames we have given is nipples, because she wears these tops that are like that, like barely cover her. She's going to be seen, yeah. So we, we dove her nipples and so he'll be like babe. Nipples was at the gym today so she'd be trying to entice you, right? I?
Speaker 2:can't Goodbye. So the thing is, is that when, like, the thing about love is that it's not just one thing, it encompasses a variety of tasks and responsibility within itself. Right? So the way that you receive or perceive love, that's another thing that I have to be mindful of, that, because I have to then portray that to you and vice versa. Right so I know, like from your point of view or from my standard, like me being a source of stability, someone that you can count on being that rock for you, and like you knowing that when you're not in the room, you're still up on that pedestal.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Even though you lost two of the stepladders, you still in your. You can still climb up. I don't know how you get up there with only one stepladder.
Speaker 1:He cannot stay on task for like more than 30 seconds at a time.
Speaker 2:But you know, know, but it's just, it's like being able, like me, being responsible to you is being, is, is me being, is you believing that you can count on me, not only financially but more but emotionally and spiritually? Yes, right, yes, and it's that I and I intertwine all those aspects of your life to make sure that you feel stable, secure in all those areas. For the most part, I think that's a key point in our marriage. That kind of helps us stay grounded and rooted together and where we have for lack of you know, have we have ingrained our roots together to become one weird dope ass family tree.
Speaker 1:But I kind of feel like that also. Obviously, with a lot of things, that takes time. Oh no, that takes time because, especially when you've been with the same person for a long period of time Almost three decades, yeah, we're 23 years in. I have changed over the years, you have changed over the years. Yeah, changing. So what probably worked in my early 20s?
Speaker 2:Don't work now.
Speaker 1:It definitely doesn't work now, and what worked prior to having kids definitely doesn't work now. You know what I mean. So finding out and learning how to grow, to learn how to love your partner in different phases of the relationship, I think is that's where that comes from emotional support. My emotional support looks a hell of a lot different now, going into my 40s, than it did prior to my 20s, when I still had a little bit of guard up or when I still you know what I mean when I still had a little bit of attitude of I don't need you. You know what I'm saying. And, of course, like financial stability, the rely relying on you financially, that's completely different than what it was in my early 30s or my early 20s. So, yeah, I yeah.
Speaker 2:And like, another thing like I think is very, very important and was kind of really, really hard it took me a long time to grasp, especially once we had the child was the concept of providing versus being present. Like I have to provide, I need to provide, but I also need to be present. I also need to be able to come in and be emotionally available to you when you have your moments where you need to break down, and I also need to be. I also need to have a space that where I can be vulnerable enough to get some of the work, slash, life stresses and pressures off of me from time to time, so that I don't feel overwhelmed, so I don't feel like I'm doing too much, so I don't feel like I'm not appreciated because I'm just running myself rampant to make sure everyone's okay, but now I feel like no one's feeding back into me. Yeah, I have to make that time so that you have time to feed back into me. Yeah, I have to make that time so that you have time to feed back into me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, that reminds me of I had saw I think her name was Brene Brown and a concept that her and her husband had came up with was giving each other like percentages of where they are right. So like, if we're both working parents, we're both tired. If we're both working parents, we're both tired, right, but we still have household things to get done, we still have kids to take care of. And it's like she'll ask her husband where are you at right now? And he's like, he's like he's at two percent or whatever, and she's like I'm at whatever percentage higher than two. Then I'll go ahead and take on the nightly task for tonight and then we can revisit, like tomorrow.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. Yeah, but see, that's what I'm saying with you.
Speaker 1:You wouldn't be fair, so that wouldn't work with us, um, but but I can go, let my battery die doing what you need me to do. Stop it. But I think, um, when it comes to like being present, I can see how difficult that can be sometimes, especially when you're like the primary provider. So, obviously, in a financial aspect, when you're the primary provider and you're the one who goes out and you work, and you work a lot of hours and things like that, and I primarily take care of the kid and take care of home, but, like we've talked about before, that's still never an excuse for you not to be a present parent.
Speaker 1:Right, but that was something I had to learn, yeah, well and I feel like that's something we I do honestly feel like that's something we still work through.
Speaker 2:Because I know for us, like when we made the shift to you being a stay at home wife, that was during COVID, yeah, and I was working 60 plus hours a week, yeah, and it was like when I got home I was like I don't want to do nothing. Yeah, like I'm exhausted, like I'm putting in 60, sometimes 60 through 263 hours a week when I, when I'm off, I want to be all, I just want to sleep. Yeah, like, and you're like, no, we need to do something. That's half a family game night and I'm like, can we have family sleep night?
Speaker 1:yeah, can we have family nap day, and that's something I had to learn too, to also make sure that yes, no, I'm sorry. Can we go back to having family nap?
Speaker 2:day Bye. Yes, we can.
Speaker 1:That was really nice. But making sure that, I think, especially in the beginning because before there was like a whole schedule and I kind of had how I was running thing down pack I still wanted it to be like I still need you to give me 80% when you're here, even though you've worked, you know, 60 plus hours. So that's something I had to work through also in the transition and making sure that I allow enough like time, grace and patience for you and have a better understanding. You know, because now it's like my energy even though I had a little bit more energy in the beginning because, to be honest, it the first year it was like you was comfortable, very comfortable, very comfortable.
Speaker 1:I was like you know what I was like home dude, the two uh, the $2,000 gaming PC guy. I was like you know what.
Speaker 2:This is great I said you do have to at least cook some food around here.
Speaker 1:I said this is great.
Speaker 2:I'm working 12 hours, 12, 13 hours a day.
Speaker 1:I'm coming home, y'all in your pajamas, so I was like my energy.
Speaker 2:You talking about? Did you get something on your way home? No, I came straight home.
Speaker 1:What are you talking about? What have you been doing today? You didn't mind picking up takeout before, but then again was also working, so nobody was. The money was different when we both was working, honey. So you know me having to develop the patience and the grace to make sure I have a better understanding, like you've picked up increased hours to cover what is no longer there, to make sure that everything can still run like how it needs to run. You know what I mean. And then as we got more into a routine and really more so as she got older and the requirements of things started to change, her schedule started to change, things became a little bit more demanding for me. And then, once I started to settle into, like you know, running the house by myself and doing things like that, I could have a little bit more patience and grace. And then we kind of step into now that you are settled with how work is going and with the hours and stuff. Just because you know again, you're working all those hours.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to require you to have like 80% energy when you get home, but you do have to have something like it's not it's not, you know, it's not one of those things where you get to just say, oh, I went to work today, so therefore I'm hands off everywhere else.
Speaker 2:And I will give you credit, because some days all I got is I went to work today.
Speaker 1:And I know, but I know that, I know that I let it be known. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Babe when.
Speaker 1:I get home, yeah, but I can feel that, but that's why I say learning your partner, because now I can see, I can see when you've had one of those days and you come home, I'm like, okay, well, tonight's probably not the night for me to bring such and such up or whatever happened earlier today. I was waiting for you to get home because another thing that we've been trying to work through, like and this is why I say this is a, it's a process, as you learn right, there's some things I will text you about, like that happened at the house, or like with the gardener or with whatever, and you'll be like, ok, well, I can't do anything about that right now because I'm at work and in my mind I'm just like, I'm just letting you know, but from your perspective, you're like I'm already dealing with a lot of stuff right now, what I don't want to deal with is you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Like you're sending me these random text messages throughout the day and it's like oh, the gardener didn't show up or you know the dog tore down the fence. Oh, can't you know the this? Can you send money for that Like?
Speaker 2:put a damn dog.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean. So that's where.
Speaker 2:I've told you, I've told you this. I don't know if I said on a podcast, but I told your problem comes to, it immediately, goes to the top of the list. Of course, right, right Now it's at the top of the list. Now I think about okay, how big of a problem is it? Yeah, Because I have to address it first, because I got to calm you down because, lord knows, you'd be on 10. You go straight to 10.
Speaker 1:I don't go straight to 10. You go straight, maybe to 10.
Speaker 2:So, like now, I have to think about what the problem is, and then I see, I say okay, I ask them, I say Marissa, okay, what can you do right now?
Speaker 1:And if the answer is nothing, I just say hey there's not much I can do right now, but if it made you feel better to tell me when I get home.
Speaker 2:I'll address it Now, for instance, when there is something I can do, I'll say, okay, let me, let me call you back, yeah, and I'll start taking care of it. But even then, like even when I can like call somebody to come out me being who I am, I don't you know, I don't really like having other grown men here.
Speaker 1:I know when I'm not here.
Speaker 2:And that's why I tell you keep Olivia in close by yeah.
Speaker 1:No, I understand that and you know like the thing is too, going back to like what you said before making sure you're creating stability by making sure I can also rely on you, right? So when I have transitioned to the brainstem of when I do call you, something happens. And I mean, if you batten a hundred, I'll be like you know, I'm going to just go ahead and call my husband and let him take care of it. So I feel like that could be a double-edged sword for you sometimes.
Speaker 2:No, it is a double-edged sword and I've literally said to myself this is exactly why our daughter thinks the way she does Because whatever I it's like, whatever mommy asks, he make happen. Whatever I ask, he make happen. Whatever I ask, he make happen. So I'ma just, no matter how outlandish or crazy it is, i'ma just trust that my daddy and you be like my husband gonna make it happen and my dumb ass be out there racking my brain trying to figure out how to make it happen.
Speaker 1:But then, here's the thing, so I'm, but then when you problem when you make it happen. Right, you know, and that's what I'm saying. I should not be when you make it happen, you know. But I but I am a but see, the thing is, I am aware of that. So I do try, like I do try to not like put too much, like I try not to push the envelope too much, you know.
Speaker 1:But if it's something where I just feel like I mean, you know, I've offered too, because this is the thing that you do also, and I don't know if this is part of like your brain conditioning as being like the provider is, when I do offer to try to take care of something or handle something, immediately you're like no, it's okay, baby, I'll take care of it. Like the situation with the car right, the car needed to get picked up from the house to get taken to the repair shop. I can very much sit at the desk and call AAA and I can schedule the appointment for the car to get picked up. I can do those things. Like, those are things I can do.
Speaker 2:I have done it, but most of the time you're like don't worry about it, I'm gonna take care of it and I'll be like babe, I can take care of it, because I know that you're already doing a hundred a hundred things, but one thing I do is, at any time there's a situation where we're dealing with any type of business or anything went into our child, I let it be known that this woman has a husband and this child has a father, so ain't gonna be no bullshit up in here.
Speaker 1:You're not going to get over on it. You're not going to let somebody charge me for putting air in my tire no.
Speaker 2:I'm let somebody charge me for putting air in my tire. No, I'm not, that that's not happening. So I said let me so some phone calls I have to make that. Yeah, the doctor's office go call.
Speaker 1:Oh see, yeah, see you, you lead me to the shit.
Speaker 2:You just don't want to take care of girl, call them a girl call them.
Speaker 1:But see in that. But see, that's where we talk about the stability, the support and patients going both ways, right. So when you need doctor's appointments, babe, you know I need a doctor's appointment. Okay, let me get on that. That's for me, that's part of household things anyway, because I'm making my doctor's appointments, I'm making her doctor's appointments. Let me go ahead and make your doctor, your dentist appointment, put it on the calendar. Whatever you know for the times where I do know your schedule or whatever else you need from me to better help, support you to make sure your day goes a little bit more smoothly.
Speaker 2:Let me ask you this how well do you think I partake in what they call the silent love language?
Speaker 1:The silent love language.
Speaker 2:Right, which means it was just sacrifice. Do you think I sacrifice my own personal desires for what's good for you and the family, or do you think I just say?
Speaker 1:We're going to roll with the punches and see how we end up on the other side If you got it out, it ain't triggering.
Speaker 2:How much do you feel I put the family first, without expecting praise or needing praise for?
Speaker 1:that I think that you do a really good job at trying to make sure that we're always at the forefront where it counts for sure. There are times where and I don't hold that against you where it's like something you want to do or something you want to get, and it's like, no, I'm going to do this because, excuse me, I've never seen you do something for yourself or get something for yourself that sacrificed something that either that we needed or something that was really important. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:Like, for instance, I know that you really want a truck, you know, and, yeah, I'm making that payment and technically, you could get a truck, you know, and yeah, I'm making that payment and technically you could get a truck but you also payment every month, but you also know right, exactly, but you know how, you know pretty of a bill we pay for making for gymnastics lessons, for competitions, for private lessons, for dance practices like time.
Speaker 2:So, and every time she don't get a nine, I say bye.
Speaker 1:I could have had a truck. Goodbye, Don't put that pressure on my baby Eight point nine, but so I could have had a truck.
Speaker 2:It's like no hold on.
Speaker 1:I'm watching her get an eight point two, cut it out and I could have had a truck.
Speaker 1:So, like you know, just using that as an example, like yeah, you could, you could go get the truck you want, right, but also being the protector and the leader, knowing that that may not be the most financially responsible thing to do. So therefore, you figure, I'll just, you know, I'll ride it out, I'll sacrifice I don't like that, that term for this example, but I'll sacrifice something that I really, really want for the happiness of what this is, what my child is choosing to do, right now and honestly, I really do try to put you guys first.
Speaker 2:I really do try, I really do, I really do try to give myself bare minimum what I need to just survive, and I really try to. But that's not what we want for you, but I get that Sometimes I feel like it is.
Speaker 1:But Sometimes it feels that way.
Speaker 2:However, I'd be like, babe, we got x amount of dollars left. You're like, oh, I'm on my way to tour it goodbye. No, I will go ahead and finish your thought and then I'll let you know. So it's like I I part of therapy has been me rewarding myself with things that I want, not just what I need, because it's one thing to buy myself the things that I need because I'd have to buy them anyway.
Speaker 1:Right, whether we were here or not. Right, that's what I always say.
Speaker 2:So like for me recently, if I can think back, like the last six months, those headphones I bought us I wanted those. I didn't need those. Us I wanted those, I didn't need those, I wanted those. And now I don't even use them. Crazy work.
Speaker 1:I'm really over buying expensive headphones. By the way, like I'm done.
Speaker 2:And the other thing I really, really want in my baby my damn Ninja Turtle shoes. I wanted them, shoes.
Speaker 1:So bad, and did you not get them?
Speaker 2:I got them, yes, and I want them so bad. And now I want the other pair so bad, and every time I see them I have fomo that I'm like when you go up to the bottom they're gonna have no more. You'll be mad, but it's like it is something where I've even said this to my friends like sometimes you have to reward yourself for the work you're doing and, as a provider for me personally, that was something that was hard for me to understand, because my mentality for so long was I don't want to take from the pot when there's other things needed.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but there's always going to be other things.
Speaker 2:I mean you saw how bad. I mean we got to a point y'all where she was throwing my underwear away.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was just a little ridiculous. I was like, sir, you might as well just go out into the world drawless Because the amount of holes in these draws. Like I told him, I said you are basically a 40-year-old man and there is no reason for you to have a hole in your outside of the hole that was intended to be there.
Speaker 2:There's no reason why you should be walking around with holy draws and I'm telling her I'm paying for gymnastics Draws, ain't that?
Speaker 1:And I'm paying for gymnastics Draws, ain't that? And I went and bought him some draws. I said, because now you're just using excuses, that's really an excuse. I had a lot going on A lot going on, but you paid $500 for headphones. That's crazy.
Speaker 2:Those headphones were not $500.
Speaker 1:No, I'm talking about when you bought both of our headphones together, the AirPods. Don't tell me what I do, yeah, but then you. But then you come back and tell me you know I got a lot going on. I don't, you know. Buying underwear is not not necessary.
Speaker 2:Another thing, another thing with you know, continue on another thing with the whole love and responsibility thing. Right Is is me personally taking the elite, taking leadership and being a leader with accountability. Now, I think I have done a better job of that recently because I've really been on my accountability tip this whole year. Now I'm on my positive accountability tip. I've really been trying to be positive, even though this one makes it very, very very hard, okay, so Hold on.
Speaker 2:I'm not done, oh, go ahead, sorry. But leadership and accountability. It means that just because I'm the lead doesn't mean I can't avoid it. It doesn't mean I can avoid accountability. I've taken accountability for that, and it's not about just taking accountability for my own mistakes, but it's also about taking accountability for the things that I allow to happen, because I always say that whether I made the decision or not, the aftermath still falls on me. So, and I also, I try to lead with some humidity. Humidity, no humility. You know what I mean Humidity, now, god, let me say it again Humility. So I try to. I don't know if you have been perceiving it that way, but I, okay, see y'all, and this has been the last episode, but that's what I've been trying to do.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I don't know if that's been coming off that way. I don't. I don't know how important like have. Have you seen? Do you feel like?
Speaker 1:what you feeling. Wow, what am I feeling.
Speaker 2:And not just my hand on your thigh.
Speaker 1:I see, okay, this is where I see I can see the second, like that second thought process happen with you where you're trying to work on old habits. So when you react a certain way to something, it's like the old habit first, and then, once your brain kind of calms down, then you are able to be like, hey, remember, this is something we said we were working on. And then you come back and you're like okay, I apologize for the way I handled that. This is what I was trying to say, this is how I'm feeling and that's why it came off this way.
Speaker 1:So it's growth. That's what I said.
Speaker 2:It's growth it's growth.
Speaker 1:Um, I think it was growth, stop it.
Speaker 1:I think too, um, the biggest thing.
Speaker 1:Well, not the biggest thing, but one of the things for me is when we talk about you know, you being or just men in general, being providers and being protectors and being the leader, and like holding down the four and being the strong one and having to take care of a lot of things, making the other person feel like they have to like.
Speaker 1:Of course, we're grateful, we're appreciative, you know, but it's almost like like weaponizing it in some form. You know what I mean, because when you are in a heightened state or when something comes about and you do have a lot going on or a lot on your plate, it comes off when you're trying to tell me like, oh, I'm stressed out about this and we have this to do and we've got this to do, and it doesn't seem like you, you appreciate this and I'm not being appreciated to do, and we've got this to do, and it doesn't seem like you, you appreciate this and I'm not being appreciated and I'm just like, okay, like, hold on, because we're in this together. There's the problem. And then there's us.
Speaker 1:It's supposed to be us together tackling it right and with bees, bye stop it being a pod together stop it, um, cut it On the pod, cut it out, so it's. You know, like I've told you before, as we're working through you, when you're taking accountability or whatever, don't. When you react in a heightened state, don't react in a way where you're trying to translate to me that I don't understand all that you have to do. When I'm yeah, I am, I'm here because I have to deal with, I get all of the emotional aspect of it.
Speaker 1:When you are in that heightened state, when you're feeling overwhelmed, when you're feeling stressed, when you're feeling like you don't know which direction to go, when you feel like you're at a crossroads I'm literally right there. You do not shield me from that. Do you know what I'm saying from that? Do you know what I'm saying? Like it's not. Like you go off into a corner and you're dealing with all those emotions by yourself and then you come back out to the room and you put on a face for me to be like everything's great, like I hope you're, yeah, you're living life, everyone looks good, happy.
Speaker 1:Like you know, then I could live in La La Land and be like, yeah, like life is great. You know he's taking care of everything, I've got money in the bank, I can go do what I want. You know, it's not like that. I feel when you're stressed out, you express to me when you're stressed out, do you know what I mean? So I feel like that's also a part of you taking accountability, right, but I think for me personally, it's like I don't. I don't want you to feel like you're still having to just carry the load by yourself. Okay, because you know, even though you quote unquote may be carrying the load by yourself, you don't have to carry the load by yourself.
Speaker 2:Okay, that's funny.
Speaker 1:You say that I'm not sure if, like I, used a lot of words to go around and say something small.
Speaker 2:It's funny you say that because it's like the whole concept of protecting your peace, right.
Speaker 2:Not just your safety right, the concept of me showing up through love, by managing my tone, the tone I take with you right, by planning ahead and handling conflict before it gets to you. So, basically, being that buffer and I do try, I make that of my attempt to say, hey, man, let me try to hit this on the head and I may not. I understand now that I tell you things without saying things, like I'll be like, hey, babe, maybe not this week, maybe we do that next week, or you know, we got this coming up. Yeah, like I never like, I try not to never say like yes or no. I try to like give you a broad paint spread, brush spread or whatever you want of the landscape, but, hey, I know it look good today, but I ain't spending this. Yeah, I ain't do this because I know what's coming yeah and I'm trying to be ready for what's coming.
Speaker 2:So once I know we in the green for what's coming.
Speaker 1:Now let me ask you this Then we can. Let me ask you this, as we're like learning, and you know how's that working for you? It's not working. It's not working for you, right? It's? Not working for you Because, because, and like I've told you before, there is there what, what I have to bring to. You know, I hate this term of like bringing something to the table, what, where I can help you.
Speaker 1:like I always tell you where I can help you when you don't allow me to do that and you don't allow me to be a participant in our marriage to help you and support you, then that like that that puts me in a very not so good like headspace, because I can either be like no, let me bulldoze through this so he can know that I'm here and let me help him navigate this, because I can see this from a different angle. Like I always tell you, like when you're looking at an issue or when you're looking at a problem, I can see how your thought process is sometimes.
Speaker 1:And you only see it, because sometimes the oranges look like peaches to me, right, and you can only see it through that lens. But when I come to you and I say, babe, let me reveal to you a different angle, then you can be like oh you know what, babe, I didn't even think about that. But that's what I try to remind you, that's what I'm here for that's how that's hold on that's how I support you.
Speaker 1:Okay, you know what I mean, but you have to. I feel like where we're still learning is you having to learn to lean and depend on that lean back like lean and depend or lean into that right when I'm telling you like babe, okay, you're you hype right now. I know what you're saying things look like, but let me tell you it's not. You're looking at the window when it's got dust on it. Let me Windex it for you.
Speaker 2:So I can show you a better view.
Speaker 1:Goodbye, so I can show you a better view. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, I get you so like. That's where the support system comes in at. That's how we work together. That's how the head and the neck work together. Who's the head, who's the neck? We won't get into that. Go ahead. What did you have to say next? Who's the head, who's the neck? Go ahead. Oh, so you didn't, don't let your little deadlift PR get you. Oh my gosh, bye. Okay, go ahead.
Speaker 2:Okay, and it's this thing, another thing, my last, my last point is that it's it's really about me keeping the promises, even the small ones. So if I say, hey, babe, you know we're going to flow on Thursday, I promise you Thursday, even though when Thursday come around, I don't want pho, no more, I want some catfish.
Speaker 1:Yep, but what happened? It's funny that you brought that particular example up, Because what happens when you don't keep the small promises?
Speaker 2:When I thought we were going to actually have pho.
Speaker 1:I wasn't happy and then, when I got an attitude, you got upset that I had an attitude. And then you got an attitude. Look here. But all this stems from you not keeping your promise. I really intend Something so small as some noodles.
Speaker 2:I woke up and said you know what?
Speaker 1:It was noodles people.
Speaker 2:I woke up and said you know what?
Speaker 1:I know I said I was looking forward to just a little, just a side note. We've literally been eating pho every single Thursday for like the past two and a half months. Every Thursday we've been eating pho, so I've kind of gotten used to having my number 11 on Thursdays you know what I mean. I look forward to my big sodium meal of the week.
Speaker 2:I was like, babe, let's just let's just hit up the night market. They got food trucks. We can go kick it for good vibes, yeah it wasn't bad, but it wasn't.
Speaker 1:It ain't fun.
Speaker 2:It wasn't my number 11 at Baja but you know, it's just that I think I'm starting to understand that it's the little promises and the little things that I keep. It all feeds the bigger, the grand, the gigantic romantic gesture I give you, so it's like it pretty much sustains you in between the big ones. Yeah, if that makes sense.
Speaker 1:And it gives me something kind of to look forward to it also shows consistency correct, which is very, very important.
Speaker 2:That's this show up that that's.
Speaker 1:I mean. Consistency in relationship is in anything, it's yeah, in anything, but especially with someone you're trying to do life with and listen in, an inconsistent man can't do it, can't do it, especially if it's like, if you're supposed to be the one with the, the plan and the vision and driving the bus, I'm gonna stand beside you. No, I'm not. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2:No, no, no.
Speaker 1:No, no, remember, I made that clear. What was that in 2010?
Speaker 2:You broke my heart.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I said. I said listen, there's a lot of things I can do in life but this ain't one of them but you dragging me to hell ain't gonna be one of them, not hell come on now.
Speaker 2:This has been another episode.
Speaker 2:This has been the last episode but you dragging me down, okay, oh, no, okay, I'm gonna just end my little part with this, okay, since I'm I don't want to, since I, since she going to hell apparently Shut up that. I think every now and again, as a person, whether male or female, you need to ask yourself. When you look at your partner, when you're addressing, when you're thinking about your relationship, your marriage, whatever the case may be, you need to ask yourself are you loving responsibly or just emotionally? Are you just in it for the feels? Are you actually practicing and working in love day in and day out, showing up and doing the things that need to be done to prove the love? Not just say the words, but actually do the things that actually show that you love.
Speaker 1:Having action behind it. Having action behind it.
Speaker 2:And you have to understand that responsibility doesn't mean that you're perfect to achieve a certain level of consistency and to set a standard of what you can maintain maintain mentally for a extended period of time.
Speaker 2:And I just want to reiterate, like it's not about just sacrificing just yourself and all of who you are, because I think that is not conducive to anything but see, the thing is about that point, babe is like once you start to sacrifice yourself, you're going to get to the point to where you're going to look across the room and you're going to resent that person well, yeah, because now there's nothing left in the tank because you can't find yourself right.
Speaker 2:You don't want to get to the point to where you lose yourself, to the point to where it's like I don't even know who I am. Yeah and now.
Speaker 1:Because I don't want to get to the point to where you lose yourself to the point to where it's like I don't even know who I am. Yeah, and because I don't know who I am, but I do know that I don't like you, right. And then you're over there still doing all the things that you want to do and I'm over here, suffering.
Speaker 2:So now here I am, x amount of years later, having to rediscover who I am. Yeah, because I've been so caught up in for you that now I don't know who I am. So that's why I 100% agree with that. You cannot invest more in someone else than you can in yourself, because you need to understand that in a relationship, in a marriage, especially in a marriage, the more you love yourself, the more you are able to love your partner and it makes loving somebody else a lot, not just a lot easier, a lot more enjoyable, because, yes, we are in this together, we are one, but before we were one.
Speaker 2:Now, I may not agree with Will and Jade's marriage Bye. But the one thing I do agree with is that it is my responsibility to make me happy.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Because that, to place that burden, because it's a burden.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Happiness is a burden, I don't care what anybody say, it's a burden.
Speaker 1:Okay, to place that burden on someone else, to make them solely responsible, to make them responsible for it yeah, that's down the line, I mean because I would say, I would say, if you are in a relationship, especially if you're in a marriage, part of loving your partner is also being excited, to see them excited and to see them happy and to see them succeed and to see them flourish, to see them hit goals. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:To see them sleep while you're getting ready for work.
Speaker 1:Goodbye. Is that what you do in the morning?
Speaker 2:To see them in the third rim.
Speaker 1:While you got to get up.
Speaker 2:While you're walking out the door. Have a good day but then they'll call you on lunch and say I just got up bye.
Speaker 1:It must be nice um, but yeah but wanting to see, wanting to see them, you know, see them happy um should also bring you joy. Yeah, but definitely if it's if both are doing the same thing, like if I'm doing things that I know bring you joy and vice versa you're doing things that bring me joy guess what?
Speaker 1:we're gonna start doing things together we're gonna start doing things together, we're both gonna be happy, and then we could be like you know, you know what I'm saying, you know what I'm saying. You know what I'm saying making love okay. Okay, think we're going to have to just hop right into our two cents, our two shits.
Speaker 2:Our two cents, everyone's favorite. A segment Segment.
Speaker 1:We're going to have some new segments coming up too. By the way, I don't want to like put everything out there yet, but we love y'all, episode 100 might be a doozy, let's see Okay. Episode 100 might be a doozy, um, let's see okay.
Speaker 1:so let's start with this one, because I think you'll find this one okay let's go, let's get it um, am I the asshole for putting glitter in my roommate's humidifier after she kept, quote-unquote borrowing my clothes without asking okay, let's go? I'm a 22 year old female and I live with a roommate and we'll call her kayla the kleptomaniac who has a chronic illness called touching my stuff without permission, no matter how many times I've asked begged or written post-it notes in increasingly aggressive fonts. She's borrowing my clothes, not just hoodies either. I'm talking full outfits, down to my custom bras with my initials on them. So I got petty and I got glittery. She has this giant pink humidifier that she's obsessed with. Just think glowing orb of aesthetic health vibes. I unscrewed the top and dumped an entire vial of ultra fine cosmetic glitter into the water. I figured best case scenario she sparkles like a twilight vampire. Worst case scenario the humidifier dies and she stops living like she's in a Pinterest board. She turned it on and within hours our entire apartment looked like Tinkerbell had exploded. Her cat was shimmering, our couch had become disco themed. I was proud she was not. She accused me of trying to poison her sinuses. The glitter is non-toxic. I checked Now she won't speak to me, and she posted on Instagram that I'm a demonic terrorist.
Speaker 1:Our mutual friends are split. Half think that I'm a demonic terrorist. Our mutual friends are split. Half think that I'm a genius and the other half think that I've gone feral. What do you think? Am I the asshole as a board member of the petty committee? That's kind of genius, I don't know. I approve of all actions the fact that she was willing to sacrifice the apartment. She was like. I don't really. I approve of all actions the fact that she was willing to sacrifice the apartment.
Speaker 2:She was like I don't really care. At this point she said, a point has to be made and if I've gone through the steps of trying to be reasonable with you, I'm going to have to do something drastic. So you know, I ain't the one to play with. That's crazy. She said look here, I was the one and the two. I ain't finna be the three. That I was the one and the two.
Speaker 1:I ain't finna be the three, that's crazy, but the the Tinkerbell. She said Tinkerbell exploded. She was like best case scenario. She'll look like a twilight vampire she said even her custom stuff that she had her initials, her bras with her initials on them, and she's already given her. She's already asked, she's pleaded, she's already asked, she's pleaded, she's begged and she's wrote uh, post-it notes with aggressive fonts. What's an aggressive font? So when?
Speaker 2:she's on caps yeah, I guess when she, when they're posting them for her. I thought about that. That mean they used to say um, um when they left the note on their food at work and it says I eat ass, so go ahead eat my lunch.
Speaker 1:I dare you my lunch, I dare you, I dare you, I dare you. She's not.
Speaker 2:No, you're not an asshole.
Speaker 1:No, I don't think so.
Speaker 2:Some people may think you're an asshole. I think this is hilarious. I wish we had video footage of this. Yeah, because that would be funny. Because to have Tinkerbell explode is not a model game. Yeah, that's funny.
Speaker 1:Wait, she gave her roommate the bippity boppity. Okay, let's get through this last one. Um, am I the asshole for refusing to reschedule my wedding?
Speaker 1:because my sister might be pregnant then. I'm a 28 year old female and I'm getting married next March. We've already booked the venue, the vendors and sent out, saved the dates. Everybody's been going. Everybody's been going smoothly until my sister who's 32, dropped a bomb. She and her husband are trying for a baby and she told me there's a chance that she could be due around my wedding date. Are trying for a baby and she told me there's a chance that she could be due around my wedding date. She said if I'm pregnant, I'll be too uncomfortable to be in the wedding or possibly even attend. Can you just move it back a few months? Just in case I thought she was joking. She's not even pregnant yet. She hasn't even confirmed ovulation yet. But her own words yet. But her own words. But she insists that I'm being too rigid and disrespectful for not trying to accommodate a possible future niece or nephew. I told her that I love her, but I'm not moving a wedding that's been planned for a year because of something that may or may not happen. Facts Now my mom is calling me selfish and saying that the family comes first.
Speaker 1:Okay. My fiance is furious and says that if she doesn't come, that's on her right. I honestly don't know anymore. I didn't expect this to become a family fight. Am I the asshole? Absolutely not. Hold on. No, mom is right. Her mother is right. Family does come first, and he's about to be my creating comes first.
Speaker 2:Fuck your mama and your sister?
Speaker 1:I do you want to say that? She right, family does come first. The family you're creating comes first. Fuck your mama and your sister. I knew you were going to say that she right, family comes first, family does come first.
Speaker 2:I'm not moving. So what's going to happen? I done put these deposits down. You're not even pregnant. Yeah, I pushed my shit back and you don't even get pregnant. And now you get pregnant On a day when my shit would have been I mean, on the new day and not the day it would have been.
Speaker 1:No, yeah, you're not an asshole. Yeah, you're not the asshole. That's crazy work. Look here. Look here, that's crazy work. Look here.
Speaker 2:Don't play these stupid games, because when you play stupid games, you get stupid prizes.
Speaker 1:You win stupid prizes, guys.
Speaker 2:So tell your sister she didn't say nothing about pops. Pops probably be like man, let him know.
Speaker 1:Pops is like don't involve me in crap, I don't.
Speaker 2:You just let me know what time and day and what I need and what I need to pay and I'll be there and outside of that I don't really care pops are here. Well, this is.
Speaker 1:This is what I'm giving you for the wedding yeah, he was like I don't really care outside of that you and your sister, and you, your sister, and your mama y'all deal with it Y'all work that out.
Speaker 2:Why are women like this?
Speaker 1:I don't know why some women are.
Speaker 2:I'm not, but why does her sister think that her life trumps her sister's day?
Speaker 1:Because she in her mind it's a baby, A duh, and she's the older sister. So she probably feels like Let that baby come to term first. Yeah Well, let the baby get there in utero first.
Speaker 2:So yeah, and why do I care if you're?
Speaker 1:uncomfortable on my day Because she may not be able to be in there. Bye, we'll live stream it. We'll go live. You can watch it one way or another. All right, guys, this has been another episode of Life After I Do Podcast. If you're not doing so already, join in on the fun. Join the 20,000 plus followers on TikTok. Join the followers on Instagram and YouTube. Okay, and Facebook.
Speaker 2:We appreciate all of our new followers, all of our new supporters.
Speaker 1:We love y'all bad we are so grateful that you guys are enjoying the content.
Speaker 2:Look here the comments. Keep me alive.
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Speaker 2:The comments confirmed to me every day how much I love black people.
Speaker 1:Because my people Hilarious, hilarious.
Speaker 2:If you keep playing with me, I'm going to leave you at that playground. Ma'am, I'm going to give you credit for that. I'm going to figure out what your name is.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna put that on the shirt because if you keep playing with me, I'm gonna leave you at the playground keep playing with me.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna leave the playground. I said that's a shirt. I said she done, gave us a word and don't even know it.
Speaker 1:Don't even know it. Yes, we are so appreciative guys. It's, it's real, it's really fun. It's fun to engage and interact with you guys. Um, thank you for all the new followers, the likes, the comments, the shares, the reposts, all of the above.
Speaker 2:Uh, we absolutely appreciate you guys don't forget, if y'all, if y'all got no, we'll read. If y'all got some personal, stories.
Speaker 1:We'll read those too. Oh yeah, don't forget, you can always write into the podcast at life afteridoepodcasts at gmailcom. You can send them to the email.
Speaker 2:You can send them to the DMs. Yeah, all that. If we see them, we try to respond. Yeah, we do our best, we try.
Speaker 1:And we're trying, we're doing of the feedback, so hopefully you guys can also see some of the little subtle changes. If that wasn't a piece of your feedback, you probably won't notice the change Right, but if it was your feedback then you would notice the change. We appreciate it. So we appreciate that and we are just grateful and just want to keep growing with you guys.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:So don't forget to continue liking, sharing, comment, all of the things above.
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Speaker 1:Hit us up on Instagram, tiktok, facebook, youtube Only Pans, only Pans.
Speaker 2:Okay, you get a new episode every Wednesday.
Speaker 1:A new episode every Wednesday. I got to kill this fly.
Speaker 2:You get a new episode every Wednesday, with or without the fly. Sometimes, with the fly and until next time. Peace, booskies.
Speaker 1:Peace booskies.
